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He broke up with me and is now hanging out with his ex

Lolagirlxo

By Lolagirlxo
in General Relationship Discussion

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Lolagirlxo New Member

Lolagirlxo

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Soo I posted a thread a while back that I was worried about my boyfriend (now ex-boyfriend's) ex-girlfriend. I felt this weird vibe that he just wasn't over her, and she broke up with him about a year and a half ago. He constantly insisted that I was crazy and I had no reason to feel that way, so I tried as hard as I could to stop the way I was feeling, even welcoming her into our group of friends. Well, he broke up with me because he said "he just wasn't ready for a serious relationship," but what do you know? They've been hanging out again and are now friends again on social media! (Yes I am stalking their profiles, and it's torturing me). I am devastated, why I don't know. I honestly expected this but man does it hurt. It doesn't help that she's drop dead gorgeous and seemingly perfect in every way. I know I don't want to be in the relationship anymore, as I was unhappy and he didn't treat me the way I wanted to be treated. But how do I get over this blow? :/

eightytwenty Established Member

eightytwenty

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You start no contact...

 

Then you start doing things to get your mind off. Happened to me also when I was younger and that heartbreak hurt. But you'll get over it, with time and find someone better.

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Gloria25 Established Member

Gloria25

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:DYeah, I don't know why people won't just be upfront about where you stand. Guy I was seeing before my current interest? I suspected that he wasn't over his ex and till this day he swears there's no one else, but you could just feel that he isn't as close to you as a someone should be.

 

You don't wanna be the jealous, current chick and I wasn't. I just moved on after getting the "distant" treatment more than once. Can't argue with someone who just won't come clean with you.

 

Follow your gut/instincts and if their actions aren't matching their words, yep, probably still pining over ex.

 

Sorry :(

 

BTW, there's a Mya song called "Case of the Ex"...and she got it down pact - which is, if him and ex don't have kids and/or mutual friends, no need for them to be close if he indeed has moved on. Here's a link to the song:

Edited by Gloria25
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Lolagirlxo New Member

Lolagirlxo

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Thank you! I gave him multiple chances to come clean about his feelings for her and every time he said there were none, that he would never get back with her no matter what the situation, and he'd even say some bad things about her. However, I could just feel it. I wish I would have followed my guy instinct before he dumped me, but no use thinking like that.

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Gloria25 Established Member

Gloria25

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Thank you! I gave him multiple chances to come clean about his feelings for her and every time he said there were none, that he would never get back with her no matter what the situation, and he'd even say some bad things about her. However, I could just feel it. I wish I would have followed my guy instinct before he dumped me, but no use thinking like that.

 

***hugs***

 

I'm sorry you have to deal with this. But the upside is we live and learn. You can take this experience and be wiser in the future.

 

Well wishes :)

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ZayKayWill Established Member

ZayKayWill

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Sorry to hear about your situation. Sounds to me like he just used you until he knew for sure he would be able to get back with her. Wasn't upfront or honest to you at all, thereby leaving you hurt and wounded. :/

 

If I was in his shoes I would have told you upfront how I felt. Better than leaving things in cold blood, but I guess now that he has her he couldn't care less....people can be so inconsiderate and heartless. I'm so sorry. :'(

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ZayKayWill Established Member

ZayKayWill

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Also just wanted to add that you handled the situation 100% as you should have. A lot of girls in todays world wouldn't even be with someone who was still friends with an ex, but you showed that you trusted him, which was the right thing to do. Had you tried to control him from hanging out with the ex that would have made you look bad AND he would have left you regardless, but you at least showed that you aren't like all the other girls in the sense that you want to have control of the situation no matter what. Much respect to you.

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Springsummer Established Member

Springsummer

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But how do I get over this blow? :/

 

Time is the best medicine. You just have to endure the inevitable pain for a while.

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Lolagirlxo New Member

Lolagirlxo

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ZayKayWill, thank you! That means a lot to me. I can only hope that next time I will love myself enough to trust my feelings and intuition, instead of listening to someone tell me I'm crazy.

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