finally left

[Glaxel]

My ex and i are first Loves. We were together for 2 or almost 3 years.We broke up because he wanted to be alone for awhile and be by himself. I respected his decisions. I still never left his side and for awhile he wanted me there still. After awhile he started treating me bad. I always picked myself back up and wanted to start fresh with him because I loved him and I wanted to keep trying. He would string me along in the process saying things that would give me even some type of hope he would want to be with me again and then changing his mind on me again... He was always on and off with me and then telling me he might get a girlfriend in the future but its not gonna be me.. after awhile I lost it yesterday. I told him to get the **** out of my life because I couldn't take it anymore. he was being so unfair to me. After i said all that my mom said she saw walking with some friends and said he was staring at her while she was driving by. She said he never would do that when she drove by. I felt like I was being harsh but he was playing me it seemed like. Will leaving make him realize anything? Did I do the right thing? Im bringing him this jacket back to his house when hes not home and I was thinking of putting a letter in the pocket.

Edited December 18, 2016 by Glaxel

[DarrenB]

Will leaving make him realize anything? Did I do the right thing? Im bringing him this jacket back to his house when hes not home and I was thinking of putting a letter in the pocket.

 

Potentially. Some people from both ends come to the senses that they should have whilst being invested in the relationship. But, that is no longer something for you to worry yourself about.

 

Of course you did. You did what's best for you and that's what a lot of people don't do. Leaving someone who you love is a decision that of course stems and builds over a period of time. From what you've said, you've given him opportunities and he's not capitalized on that and done the opposite of what you expected him to do and be like. Never for settle for any less than you would give out.

[Glaxel]

I just feel so bad for blowing up on him. I just couldnt take it anymore. Constantly explaining how I wanted to be treated. I gave him the letter and his jacket. The letter was alot more hostile and nicer and explained to him how I felt and how I dont take back what i said because I meangt it but it was still harsh and handled badly. I told him the things I loved about him and things that I hated sometimes. I texted him and asked if he got my letter and the jacket but he left my message on read. I just feel like a real jerk.

[Superchicken]

Unless there is "Real" personal issues, when some one says "They need a break", means, they are looking for or have found someone else, and see where it goes.

If it turns sour, then they come back to you.

 

 

This guys sounds like a Shmuck, and if I were you, I would kick him to the curb (After one or two on his ass).

 

 

But, just be aware, he will come back in the future and say sorry, etc, etc, as they always do.

 

 

Ted.

[Glaxel]

I don't think he is gonna come back. He's not doing anything now and I actually don't want to deal with him anymore. And what set me off was him saying he doesn't want to be close friends with me anymore even though he said he wanted to be two weeks ago.

Edited December 22, 2016 by Glaxel

[Glaxel]

My ex and I dated for 2 years and a year of its complicated. I finally got tired of everything the disrespect , the games everything. I saw him the day after I gave him a letter that was telling him I'm letting go but if the time was right he could come find me, but for right now I just want to move on. I run into him the next day after the letter and I wanted to be nice so I talk to him for a couple min and tell him I'll see him around and go walk back home. A week goes by exactly and then he texts me about some picture I took with a guy for a photoshoot. He was mad about the picture and wanted to hear what I had to say about it . And he saidsaying it looked like from the picture that I've slept with him or something even tho it was for the photoshoot. I stupidly replied . I know. Well we got ininto a big thing and at the end of it I told him I'm trying to move on and focus on myself. After that I was sure he would leave me alone now. Exactly a week later he texts telling him he sells now and told me to text him if I need any. Then texts me later in the day tellin me he's all out. A couple days go by and something really serious happened to me. I felt so low and down. This time I broke the no contact and wanted to call him tell him what happened. We talked for a lil bit and at the end of the convo he said he would talk to me later. I feel bad for breaking the no contact. But I was just wondering why has he been? Is he just leaving breadcrumbs out? Or is he really reaching out? What should I do?

Edited January 2, 2017 by Glaxel

[Been]

What was the disrespect ?You basically told him you were leaving the door open for him to return one day.

[salem mark]

little confused here, gave him a breakup letter, and now think breadcrumbs, this doesnt make sense,

 

u broke it off, get it!

[Glaxel]

In the letter I still said there would have to be a lot of change and that I'm not sure if I want to be together again. I wasn't trying to make it seem like it's an open door. I still make myself unavailable.The disrespect is just not knowing how to treat me anymore and that's what I said in the letter. Using the wordBreadcrumbs isn't the right word to use in this situation. I was just curious to why he is still contacting me after everything I said. I was curious if he was just trying to reach out or did he just miss me

[basil67]

You didn't tell him to NOT contact you did you? It's actually pretty normal for exes to reach out a little while they are adjusting to a new life without each other.

 

He'll get used to being without you soon and stop contacting you. Or, you will take charge and block him.

[Glaxel]

I thought it could of been because he missed me or something..

[Glaxel]

I thought me ending it like that gave the message not o contact me. I already said I couldn't talk to him right now

[preraph]

You never told him it was all over because you kept saying "at the right time" and "right now." I'm sure he's thoroughly confused. If he was treating you bad, can't imagine why you'd leave the door open because now what you have is a guy who is free to roam (and he will) and has no obligation to you and probably feels he can drop by for a bootie call, and let me tell you something: That is probably closer to what the guy wants than being in a restrictive relationship with one woman.

 

Of course, the big blow up will be when either of you finds out about the other dating. You essentially said "Go away, I have this need, but don't go too far," so you have him on hold. Don't expect him to behave loyally during that.

[Glaxel]

Well it's whatever now... I always get the short end of the stick. I found out he was playing me for a fool. And after all these months of me trying to hard to win him and doing anything for him he repays me by lying to me about a girl he told me not to worry about. A girl he knew I would die if I ever knew he was with her again. And then finds a way to blame me for why he is with her

[Glaxel]

I honestly am more hurt bc I've been there for him through everything I never left his side and this is how repays me ... I honestly don't inderstamd

[Glaxel]

Has anyone done all that can't for someone they love a lot and stuck by their side throughout everything and loved them for their mistakes and always stuck by their side but then they finally push you over the edge.. I stayed by my exs side throughout everything the bull**** everything I never left even when I should have. For a year I stayed by his side and he knew how much I cared about him and would do anything for he repays me by getting with the girl he rebounded with again and chooses her over me in the process.. I'm heartbroken. I honestly don't understand how this situation could be anymore cruel. Can anyone give me advice ? Has this ever happened to anybody?

[LargoLagg]

You made a mistake when you contacted him because you "felt low". So what? You fired him from the job of making you feel better.

 

There are three states of relationship:

 

In, Out, and Back and Forth

 

You have opted for back and forth. You don't seem to like it, so pick one of the others.

[Redhead14]

My ex and I dated for 2 years and a year of its complicated. I finally got tired of everything the disrespect , the games everything. I saw him the day after I gave him a letter that was telling him I'm letting go but if the time was right he could come find me, but for right now I just want to move on. I run into him the next day after the letter and I wanted to be nice so I talk to him for a couple min and tell him I'll see him around and go walk back home. A week goes by exactly and then he texts me about some picture I took with a guy for a photoshoot. He was mad about the picture and wanted to hear what I had to say about it . And he saidsaying it looked like from the picture that I've slept with him or something even tho it was for the photoshoot. I stupidly replied ��. I know. Well we got ininto a big thing and at the end of it I told him I'm trying to move on and focus on myself. After that I was sure he would leave me alone now. Exactly a week later he texts telling him he sells now and told me to text him if I need any. Then texts me later in the day tellin me he's all out. A couple days go by and something really serious happened to me. I felt so low and down. This time I broke the no contact and wanted to call him tell him what happened. We talked for a lil bit and at the end of the convo he said he would talk to me later. I feel bad for breaking the no contact. But I was just wondering why has he been? Is he just leaving breadcrumbs out? Or is he really reaching out? What should I do?

 

You were the one leaving breadcrumbs by breaking up with him but not closing the door to contact. And, what you are experiencing now is the reason for maintaining strict NO CONTACT. You are stringing him along in essence by doing that. And, most of the time when a woman or a man breaks up with someone but leave the door open a crack, they are doing the breaking up to see if the person will go all out and come after them.

[Redhead14]

Has anyone done all that can't for someone they love a lot and stuck by their side throughout everything and loved them for their mistakes and always stuck by their side but then they finally push you over the edge.. I stayed by my exs side throughout everything the bull**** everything I never left even when I should have. For a year I stayed by his side and he knew how much I cared about him and would do anything for he repays me by getting with the girl he rebounded with again and chooses her over me in the process.. I'm heartbroken. I honestly don't understand how this situation could be anymore cruel. Can anyone give me advice ? Has this ever happened to anybody?

 

Never give more than you are receiving in a relationship . . . You did this to yourself. When you own your role, you be mad at yourself. Personally, I can't stay mad at myself for very long I review the situation, learn from it and move on.

 

loved them for their mistakes -- I can love someone even when they make mistakes, like forget to take the roast out of the oven or to take out the garbage. Those are mistakes. Cheat, lying, abusiveness, insensitivity, and taking advantage of me are not mistakes, those are character flaws and they only need to happen ONCE and they get kicked to the curb.

 

You allowed yourself to be used.

[Glaxel]

I feel like I made myself look so craZy for him too. I just feel like I'm a different person when I talk to him. I feel like a person with no standards. And then some when I try to get over him.when he makes me upset..I feel like I've comprised myself so much I lost side of who I was in the process... I was so angry about everything. I just feel betrayed. He pretty much said I pushed him into her arms when he was mad at me me. He said seeing some picture with a guy for photoshoot. I told him The look I was going for but he didn't like it. I just was acting out because I was upset with him when I just made another one his excuses. He just replied " look how great that worked out I got a new girl" . He said seeing it made him want her more and said he's the one who should be giving another chances Which made me mad at myself more. I sometimes I wish the tables would turn once where he would beg me but I feel like it's not possible now. So I just take your advice from this relationship and try to better myself.

Edited January 3, 2017 by Glaxel

[Glaxel]

he textede complaining about the sex with her.. he said he doesn't get to have with her a lot..

[Glaxel]

I feel like everything I do is my fault...