adrian77 Posted December 16, 2016 Posted December 16, 2016 (edited) They are human not super human. Like for example whenever my friend dates a new guy she always says they are wonderful. And a lot of times we find out later they did a lot of not so wonderful things. The guy she is dating now who she said is wonderful and is moving in with her doesn't have any money and she pays for everything. Since he is nice to her and treats her respectfully she considers him wonderful. Like being respectful is some super human trait? And she doesn't stop to think that he could be using her because she makes 200K a year with a nice home and he lives with his mom in a rundown house? I guess I am more realistic and a bit cynical but she is in her 40's and shouldn't be so trusting just because a man holds a door, Sends flowers, or compliments you. Edited December 16, 2016 by adrian77
carhill Posted December 16, 2016 Posted December 16, 2016 Emotions aren't rational. Watch the description change when the emotions change. That can be daily! I've had a few go from 'I love you' to cussing me for just sitting there. Best one was a comment I made about the sky being such a beautiful blue. That one was epic. Restaurant epic. Stuff movies are made of. That's life! I've learned to take the 'wonderful' stuff with a grain of salt because it can change at any moment for any reason or no reason at all.
smackie9 Posted December 16, 2016 Posted December 16, 2016 And if it was turned around her being po-dunk poor and him making 200K a year.....she would be considered so lucky to find such a catch. If he can make her happy, and she takes pleasure in spoiling him....then it isn't an issue. Maybe she likes being in the driver's seat. 5
LargoLagg Posted December 17, 2016 Posted December 17, 2016 Uh, because we are? Until we're not. No offense, but you sound very resentful of both the woman's financial success and her ability to purchase the best men that money can buy. 2
Sweetfish Posted December 17, 2016 Posted December 17, 2016 They are human not super human. Like for example whenever my friend dates a new guy she always says they are wonderful. And a lot of times we find out later they did a lot of not so wonderful things. The guy she is dating now who she said is wonderful and is moving in with her doesn't have any money and she pays for everything. Since he is nice to her and treats her respectfully she considers him wonderful. Like being respectful is some super human trait? And she doesn't stop to think that he could be using her because she makes 200K a year with a nice home and he lives with his mom in a rundown house? I guess I am more realistic and a bit cynical but she is in her 40's and shouldn't be so trusting just because a man holds a door, Sends flowers, or compliments you. Hypergamy at its finest.
sassyunicorn Posted December 17, 2016 Posted December 17, 2016 (edited) Uh, because we are? Until we're not. NAILED IT! Heck, after being with my husband he's still WONDERFUL! He's the sweetest guy who takes care of me and loves me when I act out and buys me chocolate and laughs at stupid stuff with me and smiles when I'm wearing his work shirts as comfortable clothes...all absolutely WONDERFUL, until he leaves his dirty socks laying around the house and his wet towel thrown in the hamper instead of hung up, can't find his own clothing in the closet, etc.... It's human emotion! Edited December 18, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator language~T 2
preraph Posted December 17, 2016 Posted December 17, 2016 Over these six decades, I have noticed that some people are just very easy to please by nature. Unfortunately, yes, because of that, many of them end up with someone who doesn't seem good enough for them. But if they're happy, what the heck, right? As long as they're not telling everyone that just to convince themself, it's just their nature to be uber-tolerant, probably too tolerant. But I have noticed that those are the kind of people who stay coupled up their whole lives, too, for what it's worth, probably with multiple spouses, but not always. 2
Gaeta Posted December 18, 2016 Posted December 18, 2016 It's her life, her money, she can spend it as she wishes. If she wants to financially support a man that is kind and attentive to her and that makes her feel special that is her business 100%. At 200K she is certainly not struggling to support him. The world is full of men being the main bread winner and no one thinks it's bad, but if the woman is the main bread winner suddenly it's bad and the man is a parasite. It would be interesting to hear about your story and not your friend. You're entire history is about criticizing your friend's choices. Lets talk about your choices. It may explain why you are so jealous of her. 1
preraph Posted December 18, 2016 Posted December 18, 2016 Some people just can't stand to ever be alone, and to those people, anyone seems more wonderful than no one, so they put up with a lot unless they get very, very lucky and find someone who treats them right and doesn't take advantage of their desperation, which can happen.
Els Posted December 19, 2016 Posted December 19, 2016 Why can an imperfect human not be 'wonderful'? Nothing is perfect in life, but plenty of things are wonderful. Perhaps the more important question is, why is her dating life of such interest to you? Are you secretly wanting to be with her? 3
dreamingoftigers Posted December 19, 2016 Posted December 19, 2016 Maybe the sex is just that dazzling that she's willing to fully support him to get it. Hmm. Maybe I should seek a raise at work.
TheWhittler Posted December 19, 2016 Posted December 19, 2016 Some men are wonderful... Just as some women are all well... But no one is perfect and we all slip up and make mistakes sometimes. Sometimes we have things about us that are not so great. Personally I like picking my nose. I hate having anything up there so frequently root around to ensure its all "clear"... I try not to do it in public for obvious reasons but in the privacy of my own home I rarely have a finger out of my nose... Doesn't mean to say that I am not perfectly capable of being social and keeping my finger out of my nose in public nor does it mean that I am incapable of committing both random and organised acts of kindness and generosity... I am also capable of being a complete fool at times and acting is ways that are completely contradictory to my character... I don't see why men can not be human too... 1
Mrs. John Adams Posted December 19, 2016 Posted December 19, 2016 I guess the term wonderful has its own personal definition and perimeters. My husband is a wonderful husband. My thinking that Does not define anyone's else's opinion. The term wonderful certainly does not mean perfect because none of us is. There is always room for personal improvement in any relationship. But I proudly say my husband is a wonderful husband. He treats me with respect and makes me feel that I am very special. He is not perfect but he is perfect for me. So whether I define him as wonderful or good or amazing ... is my opinion. After 45 years together I am certain I know him better than anyone else.... and the only opinion that really is important is ....mine. 2
sandylee1 Posted December 19, 2016 Posted December 19, 2016 He might be better than anyone she's had before, hence her standards are lower than yours. He might have a brilliant personality, which overshadows his lack in finances. I personally wouldn't take on a man who was jobless and was going to depend on me financially, but it works for some. Money isn't everything and if he's a good guy, then he's her wonderful.
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