zena Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 just needing to vent some feelings to stop myself from texting my ex i guess we're on day 2 of NC although i didn't really plan it that way - i decided not to text him to see if he would text me at all and he hasn't it was kinda like that while we were together too - i would always text first, always phone unexpectedly for a chat - feels like i was the one making most of the effort we were in a LDR but we broke up about 2 months ago - it just wasn't working but we decided to stay friends. a few weeks ago we talked about giving our relationship another go but part of me is reluctant to be more than friends - its like, we get on great when we talk and we know each other pretty well and i know i still love him, but somethings missing. he would always say that i was the first thing on his mind when he woke up - then why would he wait for me to contact first? isn't it the little things that show you care? because we were long distance, i would write him little notes and cards, and he loved them - yet not once did he actually sit and reply anyways i decided yesterday that i wouldn't run after him (though i am so tempted to text him) , that i would wait for him to contact me for a change but he obviously cant be bothered to
Author zena Posted July 17, 2005 Author Posted July 17, 2005 i gave in earlier and broke NC by texting him.. i havent stopped thinking about him all weekend and wanted to know why he hadnt been in touch.. his replys were cold, i tried to ring but he wouldnt answer and i guess i got my answer that he didnt give a s*** about me... i feel so stupid i have been reading lots of posts on here, saying how you cant stay friends with your ex but i really thought we could - he was my best friend and now thats gone - i feel so empty and even now am tempted to ring but whats the point??? we had NC about a month ago for a week but he came looking for me, asking friends about me - why???? i really was starting to get over him then, and now i'm going through the same thing again i know in my head that this is it but my heart is breaking
katty Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 Keep reminding yourself not to contact him. It sounds to me as if you have done enough of the running, it is high time you took a deep breath sit back and let him do the running for a while. If he is use to your doing all of the contact it will be noticed by him if he doesn't hear from you. He will then start thinking that you are moving on and of course he will contact you just long enough to get it all started up again. I have been there myself more times than I can count. Just keep yourself busy, keep posting, anything you have to do to keep yourself from texting him or calling him. You need to see that you have put 100% into this rs and didn't receive it in return so now it is your turn to receive. Best of luck to you.
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 Originally posted by katty Keep reminding yourself not to contact him. It sounds to me as if you have done enough of the running, it is high time you took a deep breath sit back and let him do the running for a while. If he is use to your doing all of the contact it will be noticed by him if he doesn't hear from you. He will then start thinking that you are moving on and of course he will contact you just long enough to get it all started up again. I have been there myself more times than I can count. Just keep yourself busy, keep posting, anything you have to do to keep yourself from texting him or calling him. You need to see that you have put 100% into this rs and didn't receive it in return so now it is your turn to receive. Best of luck to you. you need to use NC to move on and not use it to get someone back. Using it to get someone back is a game/trick and you don't want someone you have to game or trick to get them to call you .. NC is a win-win deal if they don't come back it doesn't matter because you will have moved on and if they do then it will be on your terms not theirs and you can decide if you want to continue with the relationship.. You will have had enough time to decide how you feel
Author zena Posted July 18, 2005 Author Posted July 18, 2005 thankyou for your replies i think tonight i realised that i need to do the NC to move on - from his reaction earlier i dont think he would even care if i dont contact him - that is hard to accept from someone i was so close to, even up to 3/4 days ago i dont want to be the one doing all the running all the time - am annoyed at myself for giving in and texting him earlier it has been helping me to read the other threads and advice, thankyou! i guess i just gotta stay strong and not give in
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 18, 2005 Posted July 18, 2005 Originally posted by zena it has been helping me to read the other threads and advice, thankyou! i guess i just gotta stay strong and not give in Were all here when you need us .. Chin up .. it gets better from here on out
Author zena Posted July 18, 2005 Author Posted July 18, 2005 thankyou! i hope it gets better - i feel strong atm (i guess its been on my mind all weekend) but will probably hit me again in the morning
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