laRubiaBonita Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 guy cheats on his gf with a chic at his work, gf finds out before he can "tell her"....they stay together. he still works with chic, and his gf asks that he not hang out with her outside of work. he does anyways, each time not specifically telling the gf, until she finds out or guesses that they are out...usually with other work folks. he thinks it is no big deal, as he and chic are only friends, and he likes her as friend, nothing more. does the gf have the right to be pissed? especially when the bf has a fit is gf even hangs out with her guy friends that she has NO history with........ what is ya'lls take?
curiousnycgirl Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 My take is that she should run not walk! Yes she has a right to be upset he is hanging out with the girl he cheated with. I'm willing to bet he didn't have feelings for her until he cheated either - clearly there is something there. However my bigger concern would be his obvious double standard. How dare he? He sounds like a bit of a control freak who has no respect for women.
Author laRubiaBonita Posted July 15, 2005 Author Posted July 15, 2005 that is what i say....but they have been dating 4 yeras, she is 19. and she is a pussy when it comes to matters of the heart....but isn't everyone?
curiousnycgirl Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Yup we all are and although our siblings and friends give us really good advice, we ignore it. Ahh such is life.
Author laRubiaBonita Posted July 15, 2005 Author Posted July 15, 2005 Originally posted by curiousnycgirl Yup we all are and although our siblings and friends give us really good advice, we ignore it. Ahh such is life. that is why i wanna show her th replies...So everyone Keep it Coming!
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita his gf asks that he not hang out with her outside of work. he does anyways, each time not specifically telling the gf This shows that he doesn't respect her A.) For not doing what she has asked ( this is a no brainer.. If a woman asks this you do it ) B.) By not telling her.. It not only shows lack of respect but he doesn't tell her because he knows it is wrong he thinks it is no big deal He thinks it is no big deal because he is trying to minimize the aftershock effects that come with being a creep does the gf have the right to be pissed? YES .. She does and should be.. She should kick him to the curb .. Fast..and don't look back
Author laRubiaBonita Posted July 16, 2005 Author Posted July 16, 2005 thanks Fly....that is what i think too!
InsatiableStar Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Too right she has a right to be pissed. He cheats on her and then continues to hang out with the girl? NO RESPECT. She needs to kick him to the curb.
Naive Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Hell yeah she has a right to be mad!!!!! He is being selfish, how can he have the right to get mad when she hangs out with guy friends but she should not get mad when he hangs out with a girl friend EVEN MORE when it's a FRIEND that he cheated on his gf with!!! This guy is obviously a selfish a** and she needs to stand up to him at least. The guy sounds like he is not worth it. He cheated on her and still has the audacity to tell her is no big deal if him in this chic hang out!!!! Whatever! She needs to put this fool in his place!
Author laRubiaBonita Posted July 16, 2005 Author Posted July 16, 2005 ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it!
shygurl Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 By remaining with this disrespectful, undeserving PUNK, she's sending him a loud and clear message that: a) he can cheat on her and there's no consequences for it - she's accepted it once, she'll surely accept it again b) not only will she tolerate him being a pr*ck, he can further disrespect her by hanging out with the skank he was screwing around with it and if she doesn't like it, well tough beans for her, he couldn't care less. We "teach" people how to treat us - if we act like passive doormats who are willing to be sh*t on and cheated on and betrayed and lied to and betrayed, that's exactly how we'll always be treated.
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it! So just don't stand there ..... Do something
Author laRubiaBonita Posted July 16, 2005 Author Posted July 16, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall So just don't stand there ..... Do something like what?
loony Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita like what? Dump him real hard. Cut the ties, hold your head high, walk away and don't look back. He's not worth it, so don't waste your time with this jerk.
CurlyIam Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Wanna know what you should be doing, TMT??? Go out with your friends A LOT, have lots of fun WITHOUT him, try to take your life back. That's why he's not letting you go out with your friends, he's afraid that you might enjouy it and see that you don't really need him. To me the fact that he's not telling ou when he's going out with his friends and that beotch is around is a major red flag. That you should absolutely not tolerate. I even dare say - tell him not to go out with his collegues of work when she's around. If he refuses to do so, I suggest you start your own row or outtings and sperate time with your friends - I'm not talking about heavy drinking or staying up late every nigh, but about having the courage to cut yourself from him. I've been in a 4 years relationship and when I was with my friends and he wasn't there, all I was wishing was for time to go flying by so that i can reurn home to him - so you're not the only wuss !! Preserve your independance, TMT it is soooo precious and it saves you from so much trouble. It gives you a clearer view. So my advice is: start calling your old friends and give yourself some catching up time to do! Good luck!!
Naive Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it! I really thought it was your sister this was for!!!!! but I stand by what I typed yesterday!!!! Leave that a**!!!! If you don't feel like you can leave him or want to leave him then at least tell his a** off! It's not fair that he can get mad if you talk to someone but it's "SILLY" if you get mad when he talks to that chick he cheated on you with!
loony Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it! Oh, I didn't see this post. Nonetheless I stick to my advice. You deserve better. But it's your choice. You obviously always cared a lot about your boyfriend and it would be a shame to leave things so quickly. I'd give him a last chance and talk with him, but if it doesn't work out, I'd leave it. He must be stupid if he doesn't understand your point of view. If he can't avoid seeing her when he's hanging out with his co-worker, well, then you really can't change it. If he were a really decent guy, he would understand the emotional distress that he causes you with when spends time with her. Spending time with her alone is a big NO-NO. If he insists on hanging out with her, then you should leave him. That girl did not have enough respect for you to keep her hands off your boyfriend and now he's hanging out with her? Sorry, but enough is enough. If he cares that much for her, he can have her.
greenhorn Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it! LRB, you are great , you are good at pulling out tricks, like others I also thougt it was for your sister. My take on the situation :- 1. Once a cheater, always a cheater, cause trust can be broken once. 2. Once commited a fault got no punishment so there is no reason why he won't do it again. 3. The guy is not honest as well and this is the reason he stops you from hanging with your male friends. If one is a cheat then he will see all others as cheat 4. Love makes us do irrational things, we behave in a way we would have never behaved in other relationships, so don't be hard on yourself. You have the right to get pissed and if you decide to walk out then it will be one such wise decision. Take it easy and chill out in pool
Cecelius Posted July 18, 2005 Posted July 18, 2005 I didn't read the posts in between. Completely not okay. It is skanky of him to hang out with the 'ho at all, REGARDLESS of whether there will be more cheating or not. Personally, while I try not to judge people too hard for their past cheating before me, one thing I will not stick around for is a g/f hanging out (groups, emails, whatever) with a dude she cheated with, and I don't care what the feelings are, whether they were lifelong friends before it -- it just makes her look skanky. Your sister's b/f is an a@@.
tiki Posted July 18, 2005 Posted July 18, 2005 ............so really it is me. i am a wuss, i am whipped, and i hate it! I knew it was you! I was gonna bust you out, but you came forth! I remember the 'situation'. Why is he trying to be friends with her?!?!
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