zep52 Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 After a 10 week separation and with total NC she called me last week on Friday, over the next couple of days she called me a few times and then on Monday she called me and asked me to come round, when i got there she had a bottle of champagne and myself, her, & her 2 teenage children toasted our reconciliation, We went out to dinner on Tuesday as a family, and then on Wednesday we took her mother out for a meal, we talked about our future, planned 3 holidays, made love every night, all was fantastic, But tonight, half an hour ago, she said that she wasn't sure we were doing the right thing anymore, and that she needed a couple of days to think things through, !!!!! She has told me several times this week that she loved me, and that we were going to be together for life, why is she sending out these mixed messages, blowing hot and cold, i know she means it when she says she loves me, and she knows that i love her, i really can not fathom this out, Can anybody tell me what gives, i was happy a few minutes ago, but here i am again filled with fear that she is going to end it again, Dave
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Originally posted by zep52 After a 10 week separation and with total NC she called me last week on Friday, over the next couple of days she called me a few times and then on Monday she called me and asked me to come round, when i got there she had a bottle of champagne and myself, her, & her 2 teenage children toasted our reconciliation, You should not have picked up the phone .. 10 weeks was not enough time for NC to have worked She sucked you back into her vortex of Hell and Mixed Messages. Now is when the cycle repeats itself
butterfly29 Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 What happened to you when you first separated. To me it sounds like she's mad at you for something and that was her way of trying to get back.
Author zep52 Posted July 15, 2005 Author Posted July 15, 2005 We split because of her mood swings, today she loves me tomorrow she doesnt, i just got fed up with her messing me about and ended it, and fom that point there was TOTAL NC, i believe she does love me but whats with the mood swings and total about turns, she is a nightmare,
butterfly29 Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Yeah, perhaps she is really confused and hurt. She is most likely well aware about her mood swings and how much they bother you. And her even more. She is afraid that you might break up with her again. Or, like I said earlier, she might have been really hurt by you breaking up with her before and tried to get back at you.
Author zep52 Posted July 15, 2005 Author Posted July 15, 2005 But if that is the case what does she achieve by doing this, she not only hurts me, & herself, but also her kids, if she isn't sure surely she should have waited till she was, strikes me as very odd behavior, not to mention cruel, if this is some weird get back then she is playing with fire, i have just about had enough, i will give her the couple of days she has asked for, but this is now a now or never scenario, what ever decision she comes up with must be her final decision, so i will wait to hear that decision, and then live with the consequences, thanks guys.
brittani Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall You should not have picked up the phone .. 10 weeks was not enough time for NC to have worked She sucked you back into her vortex of Hell and Mixed Messages. Now is when the cycle repeats itself I'm new at this can somebody please tell me what NC is???
Merin Posted July 15, 2005 Posted July 15, 2005 Originally posted by brittani I'm new at this can somebody please tell me what NC is??? NC= No Contact
upsetnhurt Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 Her mood swings are not going to stop as she obviously has some doubts, for whatever reason, that you are the one for her in her life. It's a shame that she just can't tell you what her issues are yet my thoughts are that they probably have nothing to do with you and more so to do with her past. You have choices to make and that is to remove yourself from the equation as you have done in the past or take the time you spend with her as it should be which is strictly no expectations at this point.
phoenix333 Posted July 16, 2005 Posted July 16, 2005 from what you posted, it sounds to me like she has some serious issues, psychological in nature, and she will need to commit to working on and healing those issues before she gets involved in an intimate relationship...that could take years you are probably better off letting this one go...she doesn't even seem to 'own' her choices and her issues...not a good sign
sadgirlRN Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 zep, i agree with phonenix. i think this girl has some kind of issues she is not letting go of. maybe she was hurt in the past and is scared of the feelings she is having for you. believing they will only come back to hurt her in the end. i dont however believe that you should just let it go. if you love her the way you say you do. talk to her about it. maybe she can go see somebody and get at the root of the problem. if she doesnt deal with them she will never be happy in a relationship. good luck.
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