whatwhit Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Now I know some of you on here are probably thinking nope! Too early to go on dates. I'm not looking for anything serious just trying to meet new people and remind myself that I am attractive and they're other people out there. When conversing with someone online if you're doing most of the question asking does that mean they're not interested? There's one guy in particular I mean he compliments me, he's actually deployed right now in Afghanistan how I matched with him no idea haha, and we have talked about meeting up when he gets back next month. Just wondering if I shouldn't talk to him since he isn't very engaging? He is when we are talking just not asking any questions. I know he probably has a million things going on in his mind since he's at war but yeah. Also, he's younger than me about 4 years well 3 years 11 months. I'm 29 he's 25 is that a big age difference? I just have that insecurity of well why wouldn't he want a younger girl? Also, those who moved into a new city without knowing too many people how did you make new friends?
Miss Peach Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 With men my experience it means they aren't invested (or clueless) if they aren't asking questions to continue a conversation. I let those guys die out. A lot of those men online are just playing the numbers game IME. I've met a lot of people in my social network from Meetup groups. Just find some active groups that do activities you enjoy and interact with people. 1
Mrin Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 OK, this isn't directly on point but I'll offer it anyhow. OLD text/email conversations are weird. Some people are really engaged and have great text game. Others are awful. Don't focus too much on these text convos because really they're just a gateway to meeting up in person. Don't get into drawn out 1 or 2 week chat situations. Instead, try to do some quick vetting via chat and then meet up in person. That's when any connection you make is actually real. Gauge their interest level on the degree to which they are moving the conversation along towards meeting in person. Now, as to meeting up in person - I know it can be daunting to someone who isn't used to talking to complete strangers. Here's a handy rule. Try to use a 2:1 ratio. That is, ask two questions/solicit sharing from them for every one of yours. If you can, have the two stack on each other before sharing something about yourself that's related. Here's an example: You: Your profile/mentioned, that you're a fan of classic rock. Who is your favorite band? Them: [says something] You: Oh ya, love them. Did you ever get to see them in concert? Them: [says something] You: I love going to concerts. My first was [some band]. Totally remember it like it was yesterday. What was your first concert? Them: [some band] You: How old were you? Them: [some age] You: Ha! I was 14 and had to lie to my parents. They would have never let me go if they had known! It was such an unreal experience. So much energy in the crowd when you see live music. [insert new question]
Dis Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 I'm with Peaches Whenever a guy fails to inquire about me, or lead the convo...I fade out I've found these kinds of guys behave the same way when on dates, face to face. They talk about themselves the whole time and dont ask about me There is nothing more off putting than a guy that cant/wont lead the convo by being engaging and asking me questions I've recently refused to waste anymore time on these types of guys...nothing good comes of it Keep your eyes out for guys that really WANT to talk to you...guys that go out of their way to check up on you...to ask you questions...to engage in fun convo. Dont accept anything less
Recommended Posts