Elowen Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 I have been seeing this guy for four months and it has been going well. We are very similar and have so much in common, same sense of humour, similar values and have met each others friends and family. This guy was always the one who wanted to make the first step, with meeting friends and family and has always seemed devoted. However lately he has said that he feels 99% about me but not 100 and he does not know why. He says everything is exactly what he wants and he is unsure of the reason. I found this very difficult as we seemed to be going great and there was not anything wrong to highlight, emotionally, sexually or physically that we both could suggest. We had a brief two week split due to this, in which I saw an old male friend for a drink, it was not romantic but this guy I was seeing went very jealous and realised yes he did have feelings... We got back together and began to date again and both were very happy, he then mentions that he does not think I am the one and does not feel 100% again, which just emotionally set me back. He said once again its the way he is and not a reflection on me. I agreed that maybe heartbreakingly we should be friends. He disagreed and said he wants to be with me. I want to be with him as well because we get on so well, but Im not sure I can deal with someone not completely wanting me. I feel that no matter how much I try he will never completely want me 100% advice please?
DarrenB Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 I feel that no matter how much I try he will never completely want me 100% advice please? Then he is simply not wanting you enough. What's the point of being someone or making things more intimate and exclusive between the two of you, if he has doubts or doesn't even feel that romantically invested in you 100%. I'm certain there's a bunch of other people in this lifetime who are willing to give 100% and more. Don't settle for any less. 2
alterest Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 advice please? Did he had relationships in the past? Maybe he still idealize relationships cause his imaturity. Or maybe he likes you, but don't wan't to get into a serious relationship yet, he wants to see other women but still have feelings for you. Anything can possible. Anyway, don't put yourself into a friend relationship, it's not health for you and you are going to hold hopes until you let it go. Go full NC, improve yourself and so on. You will gain nothing with your actual relationship with that guy. It will gonna hurt a lot at first, but you will heal faster than if you stay in touch with him. BTW, what means the "on/off" term? I'm no native english speaker
Saracena Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 The four month mark is most often the stage when partners (esp guys in my experience, which is when they often pull back from relationships) decide if they wish to continue or call it a day. Your guy has admitted he's basically not 100% feeling it. He likes you but not enough. So essentially you know where you stand. Sorry. In your position, I'd walk away and cut all contact now. He MAY change his mind further down the line when he realises what he's lost, BUT in view of what happened last time, I'd be extremely reluctant to take him back 1
Recommended Posts