Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 I met this girl on a dating app and we finally decided to meet up. Our first date was 3 days ago and I thought it went really well. No awkward moments and it was just very enjoyable. The only thing I noticed about her is that she responds to texts at least 3 hours later to at most a day after I have sent the text. We are both working and we are both looking for long term relationships and it felt like there was a spark between us. HAHA maybe that's just me. I have no idea if she's really busy with work, playing mind games or plainly not interested in me. How do I approach this situation? I have been in a very bad breakup a year and a half ago and this was the first time that I have gone on a date with someone. I don't know what to do tbh. Please help . Thanks!
winny Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Forget texting, ask her out on a second date. 1
dumbass2 Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Chil out and ask her for another date and go from there. You are analyzing too much as everyone is different and you have no idea what is going on in her life. Once you are maybe able to go on another good date or two, you'll have a better understanding of her and maybe the communication response time will pick up.
Author Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Author Posted December 7, 2016 Forget texting, ask her out on a second date. She has still not responded to my last text lol. Do I ask anyway?
Author Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Author Posted December 7, 2016 Chil out and ask her for another date and go from there. You are analyzing too much as everyone is different and you have no idea what is going on in her life. Once you are maybe able to go on another good date or two, you'll have a better understanding of her and maybe the communication response time will pick up. Thanks for the reply, and like what I mentioned above me. Do I text her now even though she has not responded to my last text? Will I look really annoying and desperate? lol
phineas Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 stop texting her. when she responds, if she responds. Wait a day. Then ask her out. she is obviously playing games so play a little back. when you ask her out ask her out on a specific day and time. anything but a yes means no and you stop talking to her if she doesn't offer an alternative. 3
Author Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Author Posted December 7, 2016 stop texting her. when she responds, if she responds. Wait a day. Then ask her out. she is obviously playing games so play a little back. when you ask her out ask her out on a specific day and time. anything but a yes means no and you stop talking to her if she doesn't offer an alternative. I saw her online too on the dating app, but still not responding to my text. I guess I'll just stop texting her now lol
CryForNoOne Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Do no guys ever have the balls the pickup the phone and call someone anymore? 7
ashy555 Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Try and relax. It has only been one date. At least she is responding. Once she Responds, ask her out again. Its very early days so she may not be THAT interested yet. Like I said though, its only been 1 day. You may have felt fireworks. She may not have. You just have to be patient
Space Ritual Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 I met this girl on a dating app and we finally decided to meet up. Our first date was 3 days ago and I thought it went really well. No awkward moments and it was just very enjoyable. The only thing I noticed about her is that she responds to texts at least 3 hours later to at most a day after I have sent the text. We are both working and we are both looking for long term relationships and it felt like there was a spark between us. HAHA maybe that's just me. I have no idea if she's really busy with work, playing mind games or plainly not interested in me. How do I approach this situation? I have been in a very bad breakup a year and a half ago and this was the first time that I have gone on a date with someone. I don't know what to do tbh. Please help . Thanks! Having unrealistic expectations is a real good way to put the kibosh on a relationship before it even gets started. You do realize that this anxiety you get concerning what you may consider an untimely response will have a huge impact on how you come across to her, do you not? I suggest you breathe a little bit and relax. The sun will come up tomorrow regardless of whether or not you tow are hanging on each other's texts.
Space Ritual Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Do no guys ever have the balls the pickup the phone and call someone anymore? LOL generally those guys are still called Telemarketers. Ah the spoken word through a handset seems a dinosaur these days...lol
basil67 Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Are you texting her while she's trying to work?
Author Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Author Posted December 7, 2016 Are you texting her while she's trying to work? No, I sent her a message 2 hours after she left work.
DarrenB Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 There's no need for you or her for that matter, to be in constant contact, 24/7, quick replies and whatever else you want to associate it with. People have lives, outside of work or just simply in general. Respect that. Like people have stated, at least it's a reply at the end of the day and you're not getting shut down. Don't overreact or over-exaggerate and you'll be fine. 2
Erik30 Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 Has she always been like this, or did she change after your first date? If she's suddenly taking hours, when before she would reply within minutes, it's probably a bad sign. However, if she always texted you like that, she's just a slow texter... but taking a day seems a bit much (well, depends on your text)
dumbass2 Posted December 7, 2016 Posted December 7, 2016 No, I sent her a message 2 hours after she left work. Exactly what was the message you last sent her? 1
Author Bios Posted December 7, 2016 Author Posted December 7, 2016 Exactly what was the message you last sent her? I asked her if she's available for a second date lol. I guess not,
AMJ Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 Very few people can be interesting and engaging over text message. And so many dating stories become nightmares because of texting. People should text less, all around. A guy I met online kept getting really irritated with me because I didn't respond to his texts often- this was before we even met in person. This was the biggest turnoff. He kept saying that I worked too much. He had a job with a whole lot of downtime and didn't really relate to me being super busy and occupied while working. It's not like I told him not to text me during the day, I just needed him to not get angry when it took me a few hours to respond. Anyway. OP you need to give her some space. Maybe it takes her a long time to respond because she's really busy during the day and occupied after work doing other things. Maybe she hasn't decided if she wants to meet you again. In either case the best thing to do is back off a little bit.
Author Bios Posted December 8, 2016 Author Posted December 8, 2016 Very few people can be interesting and engaging over text message. And so many dating stories become nightmares because of texting. People should text less, all around. A guy I met online kept getting really irritated with me because I didn't respond to his texts often- this was before we even met in person. This was the biggest turnoff. He kept saying that I worked too much. He had a job with a whole lot of downtime and didn't really relate to me being super busy and occupied while working. It's not like I told him not to text me during the day, I just needed him to not get angry when it took me a few hours to respond. Anyway. OP you need to give her some space. Maybe it takes her a long time to respond because she's really busy during the day and occupied after work doing other things. Maybe she hasn't decided if she wants to meet you again. In either case the best thing to do is back off a little bit. Yeah thanks, that's what I'm doing right now. I think since this is my first time using dating apps and actually being in my first date after a really bad break up after a year and a half I think that I am looking at this the wrong way. I will keep learning and hopefully I get to find the right one someday . (Still, it doesn't feel too good LOL).
dumbass2 Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 I asked her if she's available for a second date lol. I guess not, Well, that takes care of that. Yeah, don't send anything else. If she's interested and did have a good time, then she more than likely let you know. 1
bachdude Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 Well, I would say that since you asked her out for a second date already, albeit by text, I wouldn't pursue anything with her further if she doesn't respond.
phineas Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 Do no guys ever have the balls the pickup the phone and call someone anymore? most women don't want to talk on the phone though. IF I call they only pick up if they are alone and doing nothing. So might as well just get her out and talk face to face if she's got nothing to do. unless i'm driving or its just before bed talking on the phone gets in the way of me doing stuff. texting is easier. I do however insist on talking to a woman on the phone before we meet and thats when i ask her out. talking on the phone with guy off online dating = interest most times. If the woman doesn't want to talk or says she doesn't like talking she isn't interested.
SoThatHappened Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 I've very recently adopted a minimal texting approach. I just told a girl I met that I'm not "chatting" with her via text anymore. If she wants to talk, call me, and if I want to talk, I'll call her. I got tired of the bullsh** meaningless texts. Even if it's not communicating everyday, at least things are saved up to have an actual dialogue. Things are much better and communication is better. Plus, I made a stand and that has turned up her attraction quite a bit. 3
DrReplyInRhymes Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 It's probably her husband/boyfriend trolling you.
AMJ Posted December 8, 2016 Posted December 8, 2016 most women don't want to talk on the phone though. IF I call they only pick up if they are alone and doing nothing. So might as well just get her out and talk face to face if she's got nothing to do. unless i'm driving or its just before bed talking on the phone gets in the way of me doing stuff. texting is easier. I do however insist on talking to a woman on the phone before we meet and thats when i ask her out. talking on the phone with guy off online dating = interest most times. If the woman doesn't want to talk or says she doesn't like talking she isn't interested. It's 100% true that when I'm really interested in someone, I make time for and am excited to talk to them on the phone when they call. I'll drop what I'm doing. If I can't answer, I'd definitely call back right away. The thing about OLD though is you won't automatically have that level of interest in someone right away, at least that doesn't happen often. If for some reason their profile blows me away (that's rare...maybe like 2% of all profiles are that exciting) or we just click REALLY well in the first few messages sent (also pretty rare!). Like this one guy recently asked me out, and I haven't responded because I'm not really sure if I want to meet him. There's next to nothing written in his profile and his messages to me were really short. So he sends a second email "not interested?" and I said, "well I haven't really decided yet, since I don't know much at all about you...your profile doesn't say much and you haven't said much to me about yourself either". Anyway so often if you get no response, it may not be that we're not interested, we're just on the fence. Which means you can still do or say something to sway us in your favor.
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