What does this mean for me??

[MarvelousMaya]

I am not under 25! I am insulted you would think I am a kid! But forget that for now.

 

My friend just googled my name. It looks like the bitch wife went and posted on a website that exposes cheaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't post about her H - just ME!!! Now what do I do?????? I am printing it out and bringing it to the office so he can see what SHE did!

I hate her! How do you take this stuff down???? Help!

[Satu]

This is the end.

[Satu]

double post

[Starswillshine]

I am not under 25! I am insulted you would think I am a kid! But forget that for now.

 

My friend just googled my name. It looks like the bitch wife went and posted on a website that exposes cheaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't post about her H - just ME!!! Now what do I do?????? I am printing it out and bringing it to the office so he can see what SHE did!

I hate her! How do you take this stuff down???? Help!

 

This is one of the risks you take when you choose to get involved with a married man.

 

Is she factually wrong? You are indeed a cheater. I am sorry that you are having to go through this. Hold on, the ride is just starting. Best of luck.

[eye of the storm]

His wife is pressuring him. He loves me! We spend all our time together. He only sleeps at home. I am his only love. ME!

 

Am I the only one who pictures her stomping her foot? His wife couldn't pressure him if he didn't care about her. And you don't know what he does at home. You are not his only love, if you were....he would be with only you.

 

So I have been having a long term relationship with a married man. We are soulmates. We work together and make a really good team. His wife does not appreciate him. His kids are all grown and don't need him anymore. They even moved away.

 

I have no respect for my H. I'd divorce him but he needs me because I am the breadwinner. I moved out of our bedroom if you catch my drift. We don't even talk any more unless we have to. He is having health problems now and depends on me to take him to the dr. etc.

 

My Prince Charming and I work together everyday and spend a lot of time together on weekends because we share so much in common with hobbies and activities. Then he makes reservations at a nice hotel near work several times a month and we walk over together. We have shared our special time together for years!!!! People even see us as a couple.

 

I am just waiting things out. I feel in my heart we will be together. But then last week he called me late at night. He said we are over, that it was a mistake getting mixed up with me and he loves his wife. !!!! I know she must have had a gun to his head right? So it looks like his W found out about us and pressured him to call me. I texted him with a ? He said we will talk at the end of the week. He didn't come into work the next day and then on Fri when we were supposed to talk she came into the office and they left together around lunch time and did not come back. I am a little scared but know we will find a way to be together.

 

I am thinking I should divorce my H as a sign that I am free to be with my Prince. I'm nervous about tomorrow. His wife has never come into the office so I don't know what that's all about. I should be able to have some alone time with him tomorrow. I want him to know I love him more than ever. His wife is just going to have to deal with this.

 

I'm a little nervous about exactly how to approach him. I wrote him a letter telling him how much I love him and I am thinking I can go in early and leave it for him on his desk. I don't want to wait this whole weekend has been hell for me wondering what is going on.

 

What's the best thing for me to do here?

 

Maya, I really enjoyed this post. Many OWs feel they are in a fairy tale romance but you are the rare one to put it into prose.

 

You don't know his W doesn't appreciate him, you know he tells you his W doesn't appreciate him. And you say "his kids moved away" like they abandoned him. Kids are supposed to move away. How else will we turn their rooms in to offices or gyms?!

 

She did not have a gun to his head. He is not some helpless prince being locked away by an evil queen.

 

You are creating this fantasy world where you two are being held apart by evil forces out of your control. You may feel obligated to your H due to his health issues, but he is choosing his W over you.

 

He loved being in the A with you but when his W said her or me, he chose her. He wasn't forced to. He chose to.

 

But if you are capable, I want you to take stock of what you are risking with this A. Your job, your health insurance. The reason I mention this is if you keep grasping at him and he contacts HR to let them know you won't leave him alone and are putting letters on his desk, he could get you fired. Now, they may fire him also but his W doesn't want him working with you anyway so for them it will be a win/win.

 

Have some pride. Don't write some groveling letter begging him to pick you.

 

Look, it sounds like things are tough at home. So I understand the appeal of this unicorn scented fantasy world you created with princes and such. But for him the fantasy ended when his real world intruded and he chose the real world. Maybe find a support group for caretakers. It will give you a healthy place to vent.

[eye of the storm]

...My friend just googled my name. It looks like the bitch wife went and posted on a website that exposes cheaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't post about her H - just ME!!! Now what do I do?????? I am printing it out and bringing it to the office so he can see what SHE did!

I hate her! How do you take this stuff down???? Help!

 

He knows what she did. And he may be embarrassed but he will stick by her.

 

And as to what do you do, walk away. You can't take it down, once its on the internet it is forever. And you can't claim its slander because you were cheating on both your H and with her H.

 

You hate her because your prince is showing you, his solemate, that he is choosing her. He is showing you thru actions that she is more important to him than you are.

 

Have you got another job lined up? My crystal ball is showing shadows of a restraining order in your future.

Muddyfootprints has my fav post of the day!!!

[BaileyB]

He's clearly not much of a Prince if he's being lying to his wife and lying to you by allowing you to believe that you "may" have a future together.

 

Dare I say it, but if you make a decision to get involved with a married man, you take the risk of being exposed and in this case, losing your job. I suggest you start thinking about a different future because this clearly isn't going to be the fairytale ending that you have imagined...

Edited December 4, 2016 by BaileyB

[MarvelousMaya]

Look I don't think you people get it! That bitch put me up on the internet!!! He's going to have to get her to take it down. I can't have this!!

 

I worked very hard to get this guy. We were friends for a long time. Now we are lovers and I am not giving that up. My H is old and he's sick and a pain in the ass. I do what he needs me to do as far as his health is concerned. I am a good wife to him.

 

My Prince is going to have to appease his wife so we can get back together. He loves me!

[eye of the storm]

We do get it. You are the one that seems to think you can do anything you want and not deal with any consequences.

 

When you type about him, it is more like he is a possession. Like he is a toy you worked hard to steal but when the rightful owner took it back you are raging.

 

He isn't a possession. You didn't work for him. You can't earn another person.

 

You can't demand he appease his W so you can carry on.

 

Right now, he is working on saving his M. He is showing you what you mean to him. He is telling you his M is more important to him than you are. Your prince is leaving you on the battlefield alone and keeping his troops at home because protecting his home is more important to him than protecting you.

 

If you are smart, you will walk away with what little of your pride you have left.

[BaileyB]

You really are delusional.

 

I'm not usually one to be unkind, but to put it bluntly... You are the bitch who slept with a married man. And now, you are learning the hard way just what a mistake you have made trusting a man who should not have been trusted.

 

You can either take this turn of events graciously, or you can continue along the path you are currently taking. Either way, it would seem that your happy ending is not going to be very happy...

[Chica80]

Look I don't think you people get it! That bitch put me up on the internet!!! He's going to have to get her to take it down. I can't have this!!

 

I worked very hard to get this guy. We were friends for a long time. Now we are lovers and I am not giving that up. My H is old and he's sick and a pain in the ass. I do what he needs me to do as far as his health is concerned. I am a good wife to him.

 

My Prince is going to have to appease his wife so we can get back together. He loves me!

 

Maya are you for real? Or a fake poster?

 

MM are great a conflict avoidance...they are masters of it. They create these huge painful messes and leave everyone else to clean up the dirty work. They are like puppies or children. Tell them what to do where to go and that is what they will do.

 

His wife found out. She is furious and is going to cause hell as, she can't take it out on her "loving" husband. Because god forbid he actually faces any consequences for his actions....She will take out all her hurt anger and frustrations on you.

 

I am sorry but this is just the beginning for you.

 

You can put his name on the same website I guess. But you don't know what people are capable of when they are really hurt.

[kiyoma]

I worked very hard to get this guy. We were friends for a long time. Now we are lovers and I am not giving that up. My H is old and he's sick and a pain in the ass. I do what he needs me to do as far as his health is concerned. I am a good wife to him.

 

My Prince is going to have to appease his wife so we can get back together. He loves me!

 

When I first came here and posted about what I was dealing with I was give a ton of morality lecture on how I don't care about my wife, how I am POS and who deserves to lose everything because I was cheating on my wife!

 

But here is a woman doing even worse demoninzing of her husband but no one is giving a damn as to point out how disgusting she is for treating and thinking about her H like this but how she is a "poor victim" in all of this?

 

Why is this difference in treatment? Because I am a man?

[Davey L]

I am not under 25! I am insulted you would think I am a kid! But forget that for now.

 

My friend just googled my name. It looks like the bitch wife went and posted on a website that exposes cheaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't post about her H - just ME!!! Now what do I do?????? I am printing it out and bringing it to the office so he can see what SHE did!

I hate her! How do you take this stuff down???? Help!

 

This is what I meant when I said "when the **** hits the fan", since you were asking. I must admit it's happened sooner than I expected.

 

I thought you didn't care if your husband found out?

[freengreen]

You are teady to be single for him because you love him. Why isnt he doing the same if he loves you?..

 

If you are so certain, all you can do it to wait. To know who is the real player.. him or his wife.

Edited December 4, 2016 by freengreen

[kiyoma]

How about taking a breather and getting out of town to be with family or female friends? Get some perspective. Then head back home and with your new knowledge that the A is over, see whether you can rebuild some feeling for H. You loved him once....flip through some old albums, read the old letters, look at a few souvenirs and remember how you once felt. Wherever your marriage ends up, at least you will have tried to build for your life...rather than being at the mercy of third parties who want only their happiness and would rather see yours destroyed (yup, I mean CMM and his W...at this point BW is your mortal enemy and CMM is her sidekick and partner in that).

 

Get some space, get your head clear. That's my best advice.

 

When I first came here and posted about what I was dealing with I was give a ton of morality lecture on how I don't care about my wife, how I am POS and who deserves to lose everything because I was cheating on my wife!

 

But here is a woman doing even worse demoninzing of her husband but no one is giving a damn as to point out how disgusting she is for treating and thinking about her H like this but how she is a "poor victim" in all of this?

 

Why is this difference in treatment? Because I am a man?

[Forever broken]

I have never heard or read where any married man had said

- my spouse is caring, loving, beautiful, pays maximum attention to me, gives me mind blowing Sex, cooks, clean etc while trying to have an affair. They always demonize the spouse to win sympathy. Don't be too quick to believe everything he says. People get divorce everyday. If it was that bad for him, he would be gone.

[aileD]

I am not under 25! I am insulted you would think I am a kid! But forget that for now.

 

My friend just googled my name. It looks like the bitch wife went and posted on a website that exposes cheaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't post about her H - just ME!!! Now what do I do?????? I am printing it out and bringing it to the office so he can see what SHE did!

I hate her! How do you take this stuff down???? Help!

 

You can't take it down.

 

Plus it's the truth.

 

If you're embarrassed about it, you shouldn't have done it.

[l8estnews]

So I have been having a long term relationship with a married man. We are soulmates.

 

Ugh, cliche

 

His wife does not appreciate him.

 

Or so he says.

 

I have no respect for my H. I'd divorce him but he needs me because I am the breadwinner. I moved out of our bedroom if you catch my drift. We don't even talk any more unless we have to. He is having health problems now and depends on me to take him to the dr. etc.

 

So much "for better or for worse." It seems that since he is in trouble with health, instead of being there for him, you chose to discard him.

 

 

My Prince Charming and I work together everyday and spend a lot of time together on weekends because we share so much in common with hobbies and activities. Then he makes reservations at a nice hotel near work several times a month and we walk over together. We have shared our special time together for years!!!! People even see us as a couple.

 

An elaborate Booty call if you ask me.

 

 

I am just waiting things out. I feel in my heart we will be together. But then last week he called me late at night. He said we are over, that it was a mistake getting mixed up with me and he loves his wife. !!!!

 

Oops, Affair bubble bursts! Now that his wife found out, he now loves his wife. She no longer "not appreciate" him. Typical MM.

 

I know she must have had a gun to his head right? So it looks like his W found out about us and pressured him to call me. I texted him with a ? He said we will talk at the end of the week. He didn't come into work the next day and then on Fri when we were supposed to talk she came into the office and they left together around lunch time and did not come back. I am a little scared but know we will find a way to be together.

 

If he is so scared of his wits that his wife found out, there is NO WAY he will make any kind of serious efforts to be with you. That act alone shows how he will never wreck his family for you.

 

I am thinking I should divorce my H as a sign that I am free to be with my Prince. I'm nervous about tomorrow. His wife has never come into the office so I don't know what that's all about. I should be able to have some alone time with him tomorrow. I want him to know I love him more than ever. His wife is just going to have to deal with this.

 

Divorce your husband because he don't deserve someone like you. And it is not that wife, IT'S YOU who should have to deal with this turn of events. Trust me when I say this is really over for you and him.

 

What's the best thing for me to do here?

 

Well, learn, feel the pain, get out of the affair fog, savor the pain, and see your prince go back to his REAL princess, and learn again. Make this situation a very valuable lesson to you. Your MM is very typical and you, honey, is a typical victim: Very Naive.

[William]

Folks, the moderation staff detected a person using multiple usernames to post messages here and apparently this thread is among them and, while the efforts may have been nefarious, we do appreciate thoughtful responses so chose to retain the thread content in that vein. Thanks for your input and have a pleasant Sunday.