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What I should do about my ex girlfriend who keeps contacting while I'm in NC?

Daking123

By Daking123
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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Daking123 Member

Daking123

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A month of NC ex randomly text me "can you block me on everything". I ignored it then a week later she text again with "your brother is a having a baby". Ignored it again. I'm sticking to 60 days NC to better myself

 

I'm confused because haven't even spoke in a month, you're with your "soulmate" idk why she did this.

 

We dated 2 years, she broke up with me back in December 2 weeks later already got a new bf.

 

Any ideal why she's doing this when she claims this new bf is all she ever dreamed of and makes her the happiest ever

keiji Established Member

keiji

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She's probably testing the water, trying to discover if you're still there waiting. Your ego probably bruised her ego and she needs a boost. Don't fall in the trap.

Zahara Established Member

Zahara

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A month of NC ex randomly text me "can you block me on everything". I ignored it then a week later she text again with "your brother is a having a baby". Ignored it again. I'm sticking to 60 days NC to better myself

 

I'm confused because haven't even spoke in a month, you're with your "soulmate" idk why she did this.

 

We dated 2 years, she broke up with me back in December 2 weeks later already got a new bf.

 

Any ideal why she's doing this when she claims this new bf is all she ever dreamed of and makes her the happiest ever

 

If you want to better yourself, give yourself 60 days of complete NC by BLOCKING HER. All these little messages you're receiving is only setting you back.

 

Shut the door and stop trying to analyze her behavior because at the end of the day her choice is still to be with this other man.

 

If you want to truly move on, stop allowing her to mess with your head.

keiji Established Member

keiji

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She's probably testing the water, trying to discover if you're still there waiting. Your ego probably bruised her ego and she needs a boost. Don't fall in the trap.

 

I meant "You probably bruised her ego". Typed too fast, sorry.

erklat Established Member

erklat

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You won't better yourself in sixty days. It takes much more to rebuild better version of yourself than couple of

months. GG for not falling into her trap.

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Daking123 Member

Daking123

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Ex girlfriend broke up with me in December we was together for 2 years, she got in another relationship 2 weeks later and already saying "this is her soul mate".

 

We've been apart for 3 months and I not once blocked her on anything because she blocked me off everything...

 

Last month was the last time we had contact like we talked about family, life, etc.(she was telling me her relationship was complicated that's when I just said I had to go because I don't want to her about your problems) Not the past. She never once mention me "blocking her on social media". We didn't speak after this.

 

3 weeks go by we and she randomly text "can you block me on social media". I was in NC so ignored it. Saturday she called but I was working so I missed the call.

 

right now at 4:32am she messaged me on facebook saying "can you remove all our pictures (from 2014) and block me on every social media.

 

she's still with the guy she left me for, but I see no point of her worried about my social media page when's she's in a relationship. She never ever gets on Facebook so I know it's not a biggie.

 

What's your thoughts?

PegNosePete Established Member

PegNosePete

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My thoughts are that you don't know how to do NC properly.

 

Block her on social media, delete her number, block her phone calls and text messages (get an app to auto-delete them).

 

Then she will no longer be able to annoy / upset you with this kind of message.

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Satu Established Member

Satu

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What you are doing isn't NC.

 

 

 

*No direct contact.

*No sending or receiving of messages.

*Block any means she might use to contact you.

*No replies to anything that gets through your blocks.

*No indirect contact through third parties.

*De-friend or delete from all social media.

*No monitoring of her on social media.

*No 'little birds' feeding you news.

*Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying.

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BlackMac Member

BlackMac

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Posted
Ex girlfriend broke up with me in December we was together for 2 years, she got in another relationship 2 weeks later and already saying "this is her soul mate".

 

We've been apart for 3 months and I not once blocked her on anything because she blocked me off everything...

 

Last month was the last time we had contact like we talked about family, life, etc.(she was telling me her relationship was complicated that's when I just said I had to go because I don't want to her about your problems) Not the past. She never once mention me "blocking her on social media". We didn't speak after this.

 

3 weeks go by we and she randomly text "can you block me on social media". I was in NC so ignored it. Saturday she called but I was working so I missed the call.

 

right now at 4:32am she messaged me on facebook saying "can you remove all our pictures (from 2014) and block me on every social media.

 

she's still with the guy she left me for, but I see no point of her worried about my social media page when's she's in a relationship. She never ever gets on Facebook so I know it's not a biggie.

 

What's your thoughts?

 

To be honest with you, I think there MIGHT be something more here. Listen:

She wanted you to know that the guy she left you for is giving her a hard time (karma, my dear! Karma!)

Then she ASKS YOU to block her and calls you in the middle of the night.

 

This girl is feeling like she made a mistake dropping you for him and I believe your grass looks greener now.

Wait and see if she contacts you again and be like 'why are you asking me to block you? YOU can block ME if you want, because I have no interest in doing it'

 

See how she reacts.

But to be fair, keep your distance. She seems to be quite confused aaaand confusing. Some growing is needed on her side, just my opinion.

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Raena Established Member

Raena

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I don't see why she would feel the need to ask you to block her when she could just as easily do the same herself but has chosen not to. Seems really immature to me.

 

Go ahead and do it though. It's better for you to just delete her from your life in every way you can and move on. Don't give her any opportunity to communicate with you.

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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What she wants doesn't matter but I agree with PegNosedPete. If you haven't blocked her YOU are not doing NC. Do you understand that NC means you no longer have the ability to see anything she does on social media?

 

 

Until you actually take the affirmative step to prevent any and all messages to get through -- delete her from your phone; block her on social media; delete her e-mail address; & rip up her snail mail address -- you will never heal & move on from this. The fact that you haven't taken her photos down & boxed up all your memories says you are still holding out hope. If you were truly NC, you never even would have gotten the text or the FB Message.

 

 

Instead you are keeping the lines of communication open because you are secretly hoping for a reconciliation.

truth_seeker Established Member

truth_seeker

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Ex girlfriend broke up with me in December we was together for 2 years, she got in another relationship 2 weeks later and already saying "this is her soul mate".

 

I'm guessing she met this guy while dating you and wanted to break up with you to try him out... in 3 months she's gotten to know him and it's not going as planned... she's keeping in contact with you using these excuses of blocking on social media to see if you will take her back or make a move to win her back... you are not going NC because deep down inside you still have feelings for her.

 

OP, you dated her for 2 years. She dropped you for another guy. Think about that. There is no future with this girl. Delete her completely out of your life so you can move on from her.

Edited by truth_seeker
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Larryville Established Member

Larryville

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OP, you dated her for 2 years. She immediately dropped you for another guy. Think about that. There is no future with this girl. Delete her completely out of your life so you can move on from her.

 

Ex GF keeps telling me to block her on Social Media

 

okay, So why don’t you?

 

You clearly have a self-esteem problem, based on first quote. So what exactly is someone here going to advise to you that will make you listen to common sense? I don’t get this, I will happily read anything from anybody that will help me understand this thread, or maybe I just need more coffee or a mimosa.

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GunslingerRoland Established Member

GunslingerRoland

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I think it sounds like her new guy has insecurity around the fact you haven't blocked her and have pictures of the two of you up. Screw that, it's your pictures of your life. I don't think you should have to remove them. And if she doesn't want to talk to you, she can block you.

 

 

Why do you need to block her...

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hasaquestion Established Member

hasaquestion

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I think it sounds like her new guy has insecurity around the fact you haven't blocked her and have pictures of the two of you up. Screw that, it's your pictures of your life. I don't think you should have to remove them. And if she doesn't want to talk to you, she can block you.

 

 

Why do you need to block her...

 

Yeah, who the hell tells their EX what to do? If the ex-gf wants to block him on social media, she can block him. She doesn't have to ask him. People who are turning this into "OP isn't over the girl" are missing the point. Whether he is or not, he should be telling her to kick rocks.

Cinnamonstix Established Member

Cinnamonstix

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My guess is she wants you to block her and remove those photos is because she has a habit of looking at your stuff and pictures of the two of you together. Even though she can block you, she can just as easily unblock you and go back to perusing. So if you block her, she doesn't need to rely on willpower to stop. But in reality it's also just an excuse to contact you.

 

That's how I read it anyway. If this girl dropped you for another guy, you should continue to ignore her and give her exactly what she wants - block her!

Versacehottie Established Member

Versacehottie

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Wow she has a lot of nerve. That is pretty much the funniest thing that she is demanding that you block her. It's a ploy for contact with you. The only part that is potentially valid is that she would want you to remove old pics of you together on FB. So what? She is not your gf anymore and has no bearing with things that are on your social media. As for demanding you block her, what a joke!?!? I would laugh in her face at that one. She's blocked you that takes care of it from her end--so see it for what it is: a reason to be in touch with you.

 

Maybe you can take a little smug knowledge knowing she def knows she f*cked up. Beyond that, don't let her worm her way back into your life.

 

Sure you are not doing no contact in the exact way it was meant to be done. If you are already blocked by her, there is no reason for you to block her now. I wouldn't do it specifically because she is demanding that you DO! With all respect for those that believe in no contact, the actions of no contact themselves are not stronger than you are. If she doesn't have the ability to affect you anymore, then you have reached the goal that no contact was meant to bring about. I wouldn't say you are there yet but these are tools. If you can get there without doing "NC" perfectly, fine. Just don't fool yourself. I think once you have clarity on her real intentions with these latest interactions, you will be able to keep going. Good luck.

 

ps definitely don't take her back. I think that is her long term goal--even if she doesn't exactly realize it. She is trying to plant a seed.

kendahke Established Member

kendahke

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What's your thoughts?

 

I think that her new guy is giving her grief over the fact that he can access your pictures of you and her together on your page through her facebook page and she wants you to block her so he can't see them. He is probably controlling and is saying that she still wants to be with you because she can still go on there and see them--it wouldn't matter if she blocked you because she can undo the block... and so could he. That's what I think is going on.

 

However, you need to figure out if you're well and truly done with her and if you are, then you need to nail the shed closed with her in it. Any avenue of access must be shut off: block her phone, facebook, social media, email. Not doing this is you undermining the speed by which you get over her and move on.

 

If you're not done with her, then at least be truthful with yourself about that and work out that issue.

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Daking123 Member

Daking123

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Me n my ex together for 2 years broke up in December she jumped into her relationship 2 weeks later.

 

Me and my current gf has been dating for 3 weeks. She's new to the social media scene.

 

My ex has me blocked on every social media since our breakup. So the only way she knows about my current gf is through stalking. Like I said my girlfriend is new to having a Twitter, and the very 2nd day with her account my ex adds her.

 

I just find it weird that an ex will just follow your new partner like that.

 

Why is this and what should I do

smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

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Why didn't you set your privacy setting to friends only?

Time to have a talk to your new GF about privacy settings and have your ex blocked....who needs that drama?

tayriley Established Member

tayriley

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well you are the one that knows your ex better than anyone else. is she the crazy type of person that would try to mess with your new relationship? is she very good-natured and legitimately wants you to be friends? it seems very strange she blocked YOU but friended her.

 

is she a **** talker? the type of person that browses social media to criticize other girls?

 

how was the breakup? was it brutal or cordial? did you want to be friends again one day or you never want to see/talk to her again?

 

if i was your new gf, i would not like your ex following me. how does your new gf feel about it? ultimately it's her choice. if you think that your ex might try to sabotage your new relationship, then tell her your new gf this.

 

me and my last boyfriend made pinterest accounts to share pictures with each other, and as soon as he made his account, his ex started following him. i told him straight up we made the accounts for each other (for gift-giving ideas and sharing cute pix) and i wanted her nowhere near it. he had no problem blocking her and it made me feel like my needs came first to him and it was a good moment for me trusting him.

 

also, is it possible they know each other from somewhere else? like, is it possible your ex doesnt even know you are dating this person?

 

most important thing here is making your new gf feel safe and secure. so whatever she wants to do about the ex, you should go along with.

lana-banana Established Member

lana-banana

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Ooh, this happened to me. It's a passive-aggressive means to get under your girlfriend's skin and also a plea for attention. Your ex is basically trying to tell your new girlfriend she isn't intimidated while also presenting herself as totally cool and over your breakup.

 

Personally I don't feel comfortable with it, but I also don't feel like giving her the satisfaction of letting her think it bothers me enough to block her, so I just don't follow her back. It's been a good exercise in old-fashioned ignoring. I have no idea what she posts or what she's up to unless I overhear it from others, and I'm not tempted to look.

  • 2 months later...
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Daking123 Member

Daking123

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I've been out of a relationship with my ex for 7 months. After the end of our relationship she jumped into a new one 2 weeks later, I got into one 3 months later.

 

The past 4 months I've been NC. She always would find ways to message me. ( fake app number, fake social media accounts) but I never responded. First time I talked to her in 4 months was when she kept messaging my closet friend and she would ask about me, yada yada. Then on my birthday which was Sunday she told my best friend (put us 3 in a group chat in want to speak to him) keep in mind she's in a relationship. So I agree we do the group chat and she tells me happy birthday I say thanks and leave, then she sent this message behind it.

 

"I wanted to say something out of the group chat. I just want to say I'm really glad you're doing good and you're making something of yourself like I always knew you would. And I'm really happy you found someone that makes you happy and I can just tell you care about her. And that makes me happy. Im sorry things ended so badly to the point where I was honestly crazy. I have learned to forgive myself and change myself but I never intended for any of that to happen. I'm just really happy you're doing good. You deserve the best and I hope this woman is the best & she's the one because i think you've went through enough, B. You know?".

 

We had a friendly converstation, she was telling me her boyfriend did some very embarrassing in public that she didn't like and it's bringing problems in their relationship yada yada and I ended it.

That was a great friendly convo.

 

Today like 4 in the morning she was liking all my post on social media then in the afternoon she sent this ugly ass text:

 

"I just want you to know that I know that you cheated on me with ---- and a few other girls. And it's time I think I say what I really need to say. That night I told you I couldn't come because something was wrong with my family, it was because I was with ---- and I had sex with him. & I also had sex with ---- that time I denied it. & even though I've forgiven you. I'm just gonna block you and your friends, but I honestly hope everything works out with your family. Especially your grandfather"

 

Number 1 she's a manipulater so it's hard to see if this is a tatic or she's being honest. Because for one the girl she saying I cheated on her with never came into the picture til 3 months after our relationship.

 

Number 2 why is she Boeing throwing this in my face 7 months later, when she she's im with somebody.

 

Number 3 I just posted this because I just don't see what's she's angry about

bummer Established Member

bummer

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She's angry she f'ed up and left and you get all the fun now. She is competitive and wanted to win but knows now that you did. Congrats!

 

You don't deny the other girls you cheated on her with?

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Daking123 Member

Daking123

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I never cheated. She's a manipulator like that cause that's how she was raised. She's been saying I cheated for sometime, said she had proof but never showed it because she knows I didnt.

 

She's angry she f'ed up and left and you get all the fun now. She is competitive and wanted to win but knows now that you did. Congrats!

 

You don't deny the other girls you cheated on her with?

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