linzmoon Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 Getting back into the dating game after a failed relationship, I definitely feel like I have forgotten how to date or maybe it's a little different this time. I am 24 and I met a 30 yr old guy who has a career and his life established (age difference isn't bad) but Im used to dating guys my age and normally they're all into texting day and night. He said he loves texting but I don't hear from him often, and due to the holidays he is out of town(busy with parents). He did wish me a Happy thanksgiving which in my head makes me happy that I at least crossed his mind once. Basically, It feels so new and almost refreshing to not be texting everyday, in the rare occasion, I tell myself that maybe I'm making excuses. I just want to know what the texting etiquette is after a first date, we both had fun and agreed to go for a second after the holiday break. We have each other on Facebook and he also did say he likes me //that I'm his "type". I think also, due to him being a tad older he doesn't do the texting game so much. I probably sound so childish I guess I just need to hear someone else tell me it's perfectly OKAY if we don't text often and save all the talking for dates. I guess nowadays we rely too much on social media and texting to determine wether someone likes us or not.
winny Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 So basically you had one date with him and he hasn't been texting much whereas you would like to text more. My suggestion is don't invest in this much till he actually takes you out on a second date post holidays. Keep only as much contact as he is initiating. 2
Sunkissedpatio Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 You don't sound childish at all Believe it or not it has far less to do with age and more to do with personal communication style. Some people love to text all day long others, not so much. You got used to how your last guy texted and as much as it was too much it still set a bit of a habit for you in terms of your expectations. Give it a bit of time, it could very well be that he is less of a texter in comparison to your past guys but for him, he is a big texter, or it could indicate mild interest. Only way to know which it is, is to give it time. Keep dating him and observe his actions. 4
Author linzmoon Posted November 25, 2016 Author Posted November 25, 2016 I guess after every first date the guy is always texting back and forth non stop, I also want to say partly the holidays he's been busy. I wanted to blame age because you know us kids just love texting all the time. I'll definitely wait until after the second date to see what happens. Thank you for the responses Plus since my last break up I've told myself that actions speak louder than words, because my now ex could have thrown cute words at me and it didn't mean anything so words/texts shouldn't hold that much value to me anymore.
Sunkissedpatio Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 Some of us oldies love texting too I almost prefer it to talking on the phone a lot of times, it is just such a big investment to get into a phone conversation. You're super smart to get into the habit of observing actions, words alone are not good enough. But for example the act of sending and receiving texts at random times to let someone know you are thinking about them is far more important than frequency of "nothing texts." Or starting a conversation via tex and then disappearing for extended hours on end on a consistent basis also speaks volumes in a negative way or says the person might be inconsiderate and showing low levels of investment. Definitely all things to watch and consider. 1
VeveCakes Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 I'm 33 and text all day long....30s is not old for texting like crazy. Hell we invented texting lol. 5
losangelena Posted November 25, 2016 Posted November 25, 2016 I would feel that all-day texting would be quite tedious, not to mention inappropriate for someone with whom I've only had one date. It sounds like he has realistic priorities, which is refreshing. 3
iphone_user1 Posted November 26, 2016 Posted November 26, 2016 I text every 4 hours unless it's urgent. It'd drive me insane if I texted all day long
spiderowl Posted November 27, 2016 Posted November 27, 2016 I know people vary in their texting habits but if he was interested he would be in touch somehow. Sounds like he's not that interested to me. The age gap is significant too. He may feel it is best not to encourage you because you are both at different stages in life and he might think you are not likely to be with him for long.
ElizabethIII Posted November 27, 2016 Posted November 27, 2016 Not an age thing at all. Someone who is 30 are the first generation that had texting as the norm. Just see what he does. You've had one date. He may not want another.
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