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paid dating sites worth it for a short guy


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Posted

So its no surprise, short guys on dating sites don't do as well as taller guys because of the height filters. I've used OKC, POF, Tinder, and Bumble in the past and didn't have too bad of luck, but I felt like I also wasted a lot of time talking to people that didn't take it serious or they just signed up to "validate themselves"...my brother has been trying to talk me into paying for Match since he recently met his girlfriend on there, but I'm worried about paying all that money if most of the people wont even see my profile since I'll list myself at 5'6..I've heard rumors that Match is by far the worst when it comes to height filters so over half the people if not more might not even see my profile. Part of me wants to give it a shot because I think people may take it a little more serious since they are actually paying verses the free sites..

 

Again, I haven't had horrible luck with dating sites in the past, but I'm trying to avoid wasting a lot of time talking to people that have no intention of meeting up...so for you shorter guys out there that have tried Match or Eharmony, is it worth it or just stick to the free sites?

Posted

I didn't have any better luck with paid versus unpaid sites as a woman. I only do the free ones myself.

 

Many of the issues IMO are the same regardless of the site. Men often play the numbers game, women have limited free time and good filters. The paid sites are worse IMO since many don't tell you who has also paid and they allow you to see profiles from people who signed up, didn't pay, and can't do anything.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

I think it is best to leave height off.

 

Tinder doesnt have a height box so I have no idea how tall the guys are.

 

One of the guys I met was staring me right in the eye when I was in flat shoes and I am only 5'4.

 

I liked him though. He made me laugh.

 

I think if you go with an open mind not knowing their height it might work out better. So maybe use sites that dont make you fill it in.

Edited by ElizabethIII
  • Like 1
Posted

Waste of money.

 

Just go to the gym, get a very good body and go on tinder.

 

You will pull women like no tomorrow.

  • Like 2
Posted

If you have trouble dating irl online will not be much better.

 

You will do better if you had more confidence in yourself rather than focusing on what inhibits you.

 

Vin Diesel is a short guy and he has NP...why? because he is so confident, he got noticed for his acting by doing a short film about himself....it was all about him.

Posted

Since you're a little man, hit the gym and wear lifts in your shoes.

  • Like 1
Posted
So its no surprise, short guys on dating sites don't do as well as taller guys because of the height filters. I've used OKC, POF, Tinder, and Bumble in the past and didn't have too bad of luck, but I felt like I also wasted a lot of time talking to people that didn't take it serious or they just signed up to "validate themselves"...my brother has been trying to talk me into paying for Match since he recently met his girlfriend on there, but I'm worried about paying all that money if most of the people wont even see my profile since I'll list myself at 5'6..I've heard rumors that Match is by far the worst when it comes to height filters so over half the people if not more might not even see my profile. Part of me wants to give it a shot because I think people may take it a little more serious since they are actually paying verses the free sites..

 

Again, I haven't had horrible luck with dating sites in the past, but I'm trying to avoid wasting a lot of time talking to people that have no intention of meeting up...so for you shorter guys out there that have tried Match or Eharmony, is it worth it or just stick to the free sites?

 

Nope, won't ever pay for any feature or site. I know that I am passed over b/c of my height, but I get enough interest. I have a strong profile and not bad looking. Paying is a waste of time.

 

I find that paying helps with management, but doesn't translate to 'more' serious or 'more' interested.

Posted

I'm not short, but I have a physical attribute that makes me statistically undesirable in my area. If a smaller percentage of women will date you, you have to increase the number of women. While I've been off OLD for a while, I did find dates, sex, and relationships by messaging probably close to 2,000 women over the years. My current girlfriend was nearly the 200th woman I had messaged that month.

Posted
I'm not short, but I have a physical attribute that makes me statistically undesirable in my area. If a smaller percentage of women will date you, you have to increase the number of women. While I've been off OLD for a while, I did find dates, sex, and relationships by messaging probably close to 2,000 women over the years. My current girlfriend was nearly the 200th woman I had messaged that month.

 

Yeah, it's a numbers game. Remember that the more attractive ladies are getting bombarded with messages and for you to stand-out or get a word in edge-wise is tough.

Posted

This is the approach I used when looking at profiles. Open the profile, immediately scroll down to the "what she's looking for" section. If you don't match any of her requirements (in this case, height), immediately close her profile (block from search results if the site has that feature), and move on to the next one. The goal is to waste as little time as possible on women who have already ruled you out.

Posted
This is the approach I used when looking at profiles. Open the profile, immediately scroll down to the "what she's looking for" section. If you don't match any of her requirements (in this case, height), immediately close her profile (block from search results if the site has that feature), and move on to the next one. The goal is to waste as little time as possible on women who have already ruled you out.

 

I have found that some of the ladies who have height preferences are just that, preferences. I contact them anyway. The worse thing to do, imho, is not to try to make contact. If they are adamant about keeping to the height requirements, they simply will tell you or ignore you. No harm done. I have dated ladies taller than myself who had such preferences, but the strength of my profile, messages, etc. landed me dates. Now, if they have paid features that automatically block those that do not meet their preferences, then there's nothing you can do.

Posted

I don't even think they're worth it for a tall guy.

Posted

My comment is not about dating sites. Just a comment about shorter guys in general.

 

As a girl, I think a lot of "short" guys overestimate the the importance height plays in overall attractiveness. Basically you're taught that girls only go for tall guys. The result is shorter guys generally fall into two camps. Depressed and apathetic "i'm not even going to try" attitude. OR the i'm going to aggressively over-compensate and be a total d-bag approach.

 

The truth is attraction is complex and multi-faceted, and height isnt the only physical feature women focus on. Just like you, we look at the whole picture.

 

Basically, if you're not genetically gifted in the height department, work on factors that are in your control. Like your haircut, facial hair and the clothing you choose to wear. I'm about 5'7 and i've fallen for guys who are same height even shorter than me. Because they were cool guys who worked on their attractiveness on the whole and maximized what is in their control.

 

I know a lot of other girls that feel the same. Plus spooning is better when you're similar in size. ;)

 

Good luck!

  • Like 1
Posted

If you want the brutal truth, there not worth it IMO. I have seen so many little projects and experiments that people did, including a few members from bodybuilding.com and it literally just made me loose all hope. Online dating is 100% based on looks. I don't care what fairy tale women tell you or what you read on there profile. Im looking for this, a gentleman, all that good stuff.

 

You have to understand. women get hundreds and hundreds of emails on those online things. flooded. I know bc women tell me. Guys aren't as picky so to say and just bum rush there account. If you dont look a certain way or stand out, you can send 100 emails and get no replies. Or, you WILL ATTRACT THE WRONG WOMEN that you aren't looking for. women are MORE pickier oNLINE than in person.

 

 

I dont do online anymore. Im not a model or that good looking. so I stay away. Matter of fact, I have no idea how I pulled off my last ex gf. lol.

Posted

I have had the same amount of dates over all of the sites, paid or not. The key is to take a risk and make yourself stand out in every possible way. I used to have the standard profile where talked about my life, profession, interests, blah, blah, blah.. I used to send out polite messages where I asked them questions about similar interests, goals, blah, blah, blah.. That didn't get me very far so I turned it into one giant social experiment. Now, my profile is one giant joke filled with references to movies and music (I have a close group of friends: a geek, a jock, a princess and a basket case. I dated the princess for awhile but the basket case was more fun because she had pixie sticks). I now send out messages with funny, sarcastic quips (So you're looking for adventure? I hope you have running shoes because we'll be 'liberating' garden gnomes on our first date!). Some guys put up gym pics, I posted a pic of me throwing a rock in a Highland Game event, wearing a kilt.

 

I have had a lot more success since I changed things up and it's proven to be a pretty good filter for me anyway. I probably won't click with a woman who doesn't find my profile and or those messages funny because my sense of humor is a big part of who I am. I also get a lot of responses to that pic of me in a kilt, chucking a 24lb rock. It might be a major turn off for some women and they might assume I'm a creepy troll but I don't care. Again, you need to show that you're unique in every way you can. I now live and work in a remote part of the country and I shoot messages back and forth with women who are up to 300 miles away from me.

 

I opened up a Match account based on the advice of a female friend. She said I'd have more success with it as people that pay for the site are looking for more serious "connections". Funny how she's now in a bind between two guys. One is a widower who has been single for six months and is a clingy control freak. The other is a drunk who works part time and their time together is spent watching movies while he drinks a case of beer. So much for Match being a "serious OLD", huh?

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