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First real fight. I wanted to end it.

Jordvn

By Jordvn
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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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Me and my girl got into it yesterday. A buddy of mine told me she gets around, and I confronted her about it. She said he was lying, and whatever, but I told I wanted to break up. She told me to leave her alone. Today, I had a change of heart and apologized. She was very short, but when I asked if she still wants to be with me she ignores me. I kept texting her all day, and told her I give up. She responded "Thats fine, what you're saying doesn't scare me. You made you're choice when you decided to believe your friend." Yet I asked again, what she want's with us, but no response.

 

Finally I said "can you at least tell me if we're going out friday so I can make reservations." She said "we'll see."

 

I don't get her, I know she's upset with me, but at least she can tell me if she wants to leave. I'm giving long texts and she's giving me one word answers. She won't tell me straight how she feels or what she wants. What's you're input on this?!

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LD1990 Established Member

LD1990

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Come on, how did you expect this would go? You told her what your friend said, and then when she denied it, you dumped her. You really expect everything to be A-OK just because you said sorry?

 

Stop contacting her. If she wants to be with you, she'll get in touch. She doesn't have to tell you if she wants to leave - you're the one that ended the relationship. You don't get to have a do-over just because you regret it now.

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TheTraveler Established Member

TheTraveler

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Come on, how did you expect this would go? You told her what your friend said, and then when she denied it, you dumped her. You really expect everything to be A-OK just because you said sorry?

 

Stop contacting her. If she wants to be with you, she'll get in touch. She doesn't have to tell you if she wants to leave - you're the one that ended the relationship. You don't get to have a do-over just because you regret it now.

 

Lol pretty much

 

Friend says something. You confront her. You dump her. You are the fool

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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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Come on, how did you expect this would go? You told her what your friend said, and then when she denied it, you dumped her. You really expect everything to be A-OK just because you said sorry?

 

Stop contacting her. If she wants to be with you, she'll get in touch. She doesn't have to tell you if she wants to leave - you're the one that ended the relationship. You don't get to have a do-over just because you regret it now.

 

She said it was fine after I apologized. I told her to talk about how she felt, but didn't want to. I told her I wanted to be with her but I guess she's still upset.

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BaileyB Established Member

BaileyB

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Yeah, if you accused your girlfriend off of what your friend said, she'd have to be pretty silly to go out with you again on Friday. There is kind of no going back from that one. And, if she does... Then you pretty much deserve each other.

 

Both of you sound like you need to develop a little more maturity, to be very honest. Maturity, trust, communication, ability to manage conflict... The list goes on and on...

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bubbaganoosh Established Member

bubbaganoosh

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Whats the old saying? believe half of what you see and nothing you here. Should have followed that rule.

 

Now you find out that your buddy had a axe to grind with her so he tells you she's a tramp and you take it as gospel truth and break up with her without giving her a fair chance to at least defend herself and now she's pissed.................Duh!!

 

Put the shoe on the other foot and one of her friends tells her you beat up a girl because they wanted to get even and she believed them without you getting a chance to defend yourself and she cuts you loose. You would feel the same way. Good luck and if she does come around, buy her some flowers and make sure your apology is sincere.

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ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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My input is that you made a huge mistake and you don't get it.

 

What you questioned her about is downright insulting. No wonder she doesn't want to talk to you.

 

Sorry OP, but you messed this one up. Leave her alone.

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Sweetfish Established Member

Sweetfish

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You belived some dude over your gf.

 

Trust is lost and so is the fabric of the relationship.

 

When you say crap like that it's like taking an axe to a tree.

 

You simply can't heal the damage by apologizing.

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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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I get it, I F'd up.

 

But what I want to know is, why won't she reply when I ask if she wants to be with me still?

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Sweetfish Established Member

Sweetfish

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I get it, I F'd up.

 

But what I want to know is, why won't she reply when I ask if she wants to be with me still?

 

 

your best bet.. is to leave her alone. You created damage in the honeymoon period. Wait for her to ask you about the date you setup. DO NOT ASK HER AGAIN. Do not bring up what happen, unless she brings it up. When you go on this date DO NOT. I REPEAT DO NOT ACT ANY DIFFERENT THAN YOU USUALLY DO.

 

If you magically go on this date because she felt you made a mistake. At the end of this date you need to apologize to her and let her know you had a great night/day and Now you tell her what you did was unacceptable and understand if this relationship does not continue after tonight.

 

 

KEEP IT SIMPLE. SHORT and HONEST.

 

The only alternative to this is if she wants to talk about it or brings it up first.

 

If she doesn't want to be with you anymore.. walk away like a man and learn from your mistake.

 

 

What do you do now.. Nothing stupid lol. Think about the things that come out of your mouth and come here first before you react and listen to everyone's advice,

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ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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She's probably trying to give you a taste of your own medicine.

 

Good idea? No. But that's my guess.

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Satu Established Member

Satu

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She's angry and punishing you with the silent treatment, which is as bad or possibly worse than what you did.

 

Leave her to her own devices for now.

 

 

Take care.

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DK_Casus Established Member

DK_Casus

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Ehm, what does "gets around" mean? Does it mean she's had many previous partners? If so, then what's the problem?

 

If it means she's cheating on you - I'd say having no other indication of that than the word of your friend is a very weak position from which to accuse her. You need hard evidence - and if you're going to confront her, it should be from a position of an open mind.

 

All I can say is that if I was accused of cheating - and my GF chose to believe her friend - I would dump her instantly.

 

That's because I have integrity and never cheat. So, with no indication beyond the word of a "friend" - I would feel like there was no trust between us, and that can't work no matter what.

 

If you DO find out she's a cheater - you can consider yourself lucky.

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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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Should I say Happy Thanksgiving & break the ice on thursday? I need to talk with her about friday anyways.

MidwestUSA Established Member

MidwestUSA

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Should I say Happy Thanksgiving & break the ice on thursday? I need to talk with her about friday anyways.

 

No! Just stop! Have you not read any replies?

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dumbass2 Established Member

dumbass2

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Stop it now. You just don't get it!! Forget about Friday. It's not happening unless she tells you it is. Right now I'd assume it's not. Continue to contact her and push her further away. You screwed up big time!! Now you'll have to realize that you will have to suffer. How long is up to her. You might just be done after that. If she was on here asking advise, everyone on here would be telling here to delete and block you and move on as fast as she can.

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basil67 Established Member

basil67

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You broke up with her. She owes you NOTHING.

 

She does not need to accept your apology. She does not need to speak with you. The fact that you seem to feel that she should respond to you speaks volumes about your sense of entitlement.

 

You lost the right to civil conversation when you ended the relationship.

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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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You broke up with her. She owes you NOTHING.

 

She does not need to accept your apology. She does not need to speak with you. The fact that you seem to feel that she should respond to you speaks volumes about your sense of entitlement.

 

You lost the right to civil conversation when you ended the relationship.

 

dude, I told her that I didn't want to break up, and it was on her, but she doesn't respond about it.

basil67 Established Member

basil67

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dude, I told her that I didn't want to break up, and it was on her, but she doesn't respond about it.

 

You told her that you wanted to break up during the fight. That is a Break Up.

 

Changing your mind afterwards doesn't negate the fact you broke up during the fight.

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Jordvn Established Member

Jordvn

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You told her that you wanted to break up during the fight. That is a Break Up.

 

Changing your mind afterwards doesn't negate the fact you broke up during the fight.

 

Yeah, I didn't pull the trigger.

 

I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day.

ufo8mycat Established Member

ufo8mycat

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Yeah, I didn't pull the trigger.

 

I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day.

 

Nah you accused her and then broke up with her.

 

I would ignore you all day too. And forever.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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LD1990 Established Member

LD1990

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Yeah, I didn't pull the trigger.

 

I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day.

 

LMAO. What twisted reality do you live in? You told her you wanted to break up, and then changed your mind a day later. That's pulling the trigger. You just want a do-over.

 

And how exactly did you figure that you're in a position to make demands? You really think she gives a **** about establishing good communication when she doesn't even want to be with you?

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basil67 Established Member

basil67

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Yeah, I didn't pull the trigger.

 

I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day.

 

You pulled the trigger when this went down

 

//A buddy of mine told me she gets around, and I confronted her about it. She said he was lying, and whatever, but I told I wanted to break up. She told me to leave her alone//

 

But I'm confused about this next bit. Did you say it before or after you accused her and broke up with her?

 

//I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day//

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
language~T
ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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Yeah, I didn't pull the trigger.

 

I told her, "if we're gonna be in a relationship, you're going have to establish good communication." That's when she responds after ignoring me all day.

 

So did you or did you not break up with her during the fight?

 

Because the way you initially described it, it was you who ended it. Changing your mind after the fact isn't relevant.

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Sweetfish Established Member

Sweetfish

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Should I say Happy Thanksgiving & break the ice on thursday? I need to talk with her about friday anyways.

 

Good night sweet prince

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