Duvessa Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 I miss my ex so much. How am I ever going to stop thinking about him and us. Its been 2 days nc. I wonder if he even misses me. If he ever will. Everything reminds me of him. Its very difficult to imagine my life without him. How long is this pain going to last. Im in agony.
J dub Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Originally posted by Duvessa I miss my ex so much. How am I ever going to stop thinking about him and us. Its been 2 days nc. I wonder if he even misses me. If he ever will. Everything reminds me of him. Its very difficult to imagine my life without him. How long is this pain going to last. Im in agony. I am in the same boat sweetheart...its been six days of NC for me (he sent me a text 2 days ago but I didnt respond) and its tearing me apart because I miss him dearly. I wonder if they think of us just as much? I am having a hard time accepting it, thats probably one of the worst parts
sanne Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 eh, pretty soon you'll just get so tired of hurting your heart becomes numb......jk. The first few days are so hard, but after a while it just becomes routine. Yes you get the occasional urge to make contact, but then you realize why you are doing NC in the first place and you snap out of it. there's not much to say other than to keep busy and to keep trying.
butterfly29 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Tell me about it... Everyone is different. Been 4 months for me and it still lasts. Well, 4 months since break up, a month since we last saw each other, 2 weeks since last email. it's on and off but it will go away eventually. What you need right now is seek support from your friends and family, and of course people that are going through the same $hit. If you get sick of bitching to your friends there is other support out there, believe me. The worst thing you can do to yourself right now is let yourself be alone. You're not! I found it helpful to read other people's posts. That includes yours so I thank you.
Author Duvessa Posted July 13, 2005 Author Posted July 13, 2005 I know this will eventually end. Ive been through it before.and i told myself then that i would never let myself feel this way again. and here i am with this same ****. He was my everything. Its weird to think that a year from now he will be just anyone to me. I dont want to think of him as just anyone. i dont want to not care for him anymore.does that sound crazy. i guess im no ready to let him out of my heart yet.
J dub Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 try your best not to worry/think about whats going to happen in the future because you really dont know...just take it as it comes and work with what you have. When I think back to 5 yrs ago when I was going thru this I didnt want to imagine my ex being just anyone to me, but now? I think he's a total bum and would never give him a second thought! so...there's lots of time to work thru your feelings, dont rush them.
butterfly29 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Yeah, I have just now came to acceptance that my ex and I weren't going to be friends. I really don't want him to be special in my life anymore. I think about how self centered he was and how he treated me and how he really hurt me in the end. No man in my life has ever hurt me as much. And the relationship we had, it was all about him. And I had to put up with all that. And you know what, I was horrified at the idea that he might be just anyone for me the first few days. Only a month earlier he told me I was his best firend and he couldn't trust anyone as much as he could trust me. And I tried to be friends. But now that I think about it, I really don't like him as a person. I can't trust him. He doesn't have the qualities of what I seek in people to be my friends. Just think about this, Duvessa, do you really like him as a person? Forget the fact that you're still attracted to him. There was a reason why you broke up in the first place.
Delicaterose00 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Hey guys... good advice. Im glad I am not alone in this... and yes I understand extacly what you mean... Its been 2 months since break up, and today is the first day of No calling.......It sadness me because its like.. how do you go from someone calling you everyday for 2 years... to nothing at all??? Its very hard and I feel your pain.. Im going through it right now... Your not alone, and we will get stronger, we are women, we can deal with this, its just " How" is what we want to know.... right girls?? Its starting to get so annoying though how he is in my head 24/7.... I wish I could just fall in love again already and get over him, thats what happend last time.. left my other ex of another 2 years and met this ex right away.. love at first site... and now Im back to the pain again... I do say its better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all, but not multiple times.. I mean.... 3 times for me... this one being the worse though.. is enough for me.... I wish the pain will go away, and I know you wish that too and it will, but its good we have this website because we know we are not alone in this pain and we all will find someone.... even though we dont believe that right now...... we will.. we have to pass through that brick wall made of our ex's right now... I have craked it.. but I havent gotten through yet.. lol.... stay strong everyone, and I will be thinking of all you ... I think tonight Im going to say a prayer for all of us.. good bye for now.. Kristen
sanne Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 i think you should all know that even your ex's are hurtin a little too. they probably all miss you too, maybe not to the same degree though. the hardest part for me was wondering if my ex even cared about me at all, and well i found out that this is affecting her just as much as it is me. In fact, probably more so her than me.
butterfly29 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Originally posted by sanne i think you should all know that even your ex's are hurtin a little too. they probably all miss you too, maybe not to the same degree though. the hardest part for me was wondering if my ex even cared about me at all, and well i found out that this is affecting her just as much as it is me. In fact, probably more so her than me. You know what, I was wondering too. But honestly, I really don't give a damn how he feels about it. And most importantly, I don't want to know!
totallyconfused Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 i am hurting too and its only been 3 days of NC. even though he has called me once everyday since my "NC policy", its hard to realize i'm alone. hard to not talk to my best friend everyday for the past FOUR years. it hurts, he was family to me. i treated him like family and let me tell ya, after the way we ended this, DONT EVER mix family and boyfriends together. B/c family is gonna be there for you always, no matter what. i NOW realize the saying..."boyfriends come and go..." b/c this one will surely be out the door. its only been the 6th day since i found out he cheated on me, and the 3rd day that we're officially broken up. i want to stop counting the days. i figure once i hit 7 days on NC - im in the home stretch. this man isnt right for me. all he wants to do is go screw some little girl to make himself feel better about himself, b/c he couldnt handle my success. i was willing to share everything with him, my success and fortune. i feel absolutely stupid that i still care for him even after all the cheating, lying, and betrayal he did to me in the past few days. i am literally mourning the death of my best friend, b/c the person who he is now, is like a complete stranger to me. thats why im trying to meet new friends, b/c truly i am grieving a death of a friend. its sad, but dammit dead people dont call you so it makes it harder. i will say what made me feel better one morning. the mornings are the hardest for me, b/c the moment i wake up i remember again how alone i am. i went and grabbed some sloppy clothes to wear for work, but just before i left i looked at the mirror. i saw how sloppy and ugly i looked. i said to myself aloud, why am i gonna go to work looking like a bum? he is not the one giving me a poor attitude on my life, its ME that is gonna give the attitude. if your gonna look sloppy, your gonna feel sloppy. so right away i changed to something nicer and let me tell ya, that made my whole day much better. just keep your head up, DONT JUST TRY, DO IT. follow through with NC and not thinking. delete online history or buddies to prevent it from making you think of things. CONTROL YOUR THOUGHTS!
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