mortensorchid Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 A few years ago on this forum I posted about a guy who I was annoyed with. I met him on Match a while ago, then after he badgered me to see another photo I sent one to him on my phone. He simply texted back "thanks" and I didn't hear anything from him afterwards. Then out of no where he would call me. On the Friday before every holiday weekend he would call and leave a voicemail asking if I was interested still in meeting. I was not, so I never returned the phone calls. This kept up for months until one day, true to form, on the Friday before a holiday weekend he called and I picked up the phone. He said "Hi this is (Name)." "(Name)? I'm sorry to don't know anyone by that name.". He said we had met on Match about 9 months ago (yes, MONTHS at that point). I said "Oh right.". Then he said he was thinking that since we never got together 9 MONTHS ago we should meet now. I said "No thank you", he was angry and asked "Why not?". I hung up on him. No contact since. I am now in another. I was on Tinder a while ago, as in sometime in January. I got a bad vibe off of him after I had traded a phone number with him. He traced my phone number through Facebook and friended me there, and then I looked in his Facebook page and saw a thing that gave me pause. It may sound caddy but he is friends with a gal I went to high school with. This gal is one of the strangest people I have ever encountered. Yes it has been 20+ years since high school, things have changed but not by much with this gal. This was/is an automatic red flag because someone who would want to be friends with her is a weirdo. Plus after a few conversational texts I saw a pattern that he was not going to ask me out anytime soon, and I stopped returning his texts and unfriended him on Facebook. We have, incidentally never even talked on the phone. I got a text from him almost six months after he sent his last one. He hopes I will throw him a bone. What else can I do but ignore it?
selinaluv Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 I vote ignore. You haven't even met (or even agreed to meet from what I can tell), so you don't owe him anything. 3
TheTraveler Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 I am now in another. I was on Tinder a while ago, as in sometime in January. I got a bad vibe off of him after I had traded a phone number with him. He traced my phone number through Facebook and friended me there, and then I looked in his Facebook page and saw a thing that gave me pause. It may sound caddy but he is friends with a gal I went to high school with. This gal is one of the strangest people I have ever encountered. Yes it has been 20+ years since high school, things have changed but not by much with this gal. This was/is an automatic red flag because someone who would want to be friends with her is a weirdo. Plus after a few conversational texts I saw a pattern that he was not going to ask me out anytime soon, and I stopped returning his texts and unfriended him on Facebook. We have, incidentally never even talked on the phone. I got a text from him almost six months after he sent his last one. He hopes I will throw him a bone. What else can I do but ignore it? Another reason for the people out there to not fb friends from a dating app before you meet. Who knows why they are friends. Maybe they worked an event together, maybe they were invited to a wedding and sat at the same table. I mean who really knows.
Author mortensorchid Posted November 17, 2016 Author Posted November 17, 2016 @ OP - It was clear that the two of them are friend friends, they were not caught in some situation in a public place where someone for some reason snapped their photo together. And that gives me pause because she was/is a miserable person. She may have changed somewhat since then, but, as I learned, not by much. You're born the way you are and you stay that way. Her aside, I decided that this is just odd. Once someone stops communicating with me (especially in an OLD situation) I stop with them. I have held onto their phone numbers not because I am interested in seeing them again but because I am too lazy to erase the numbers half the time. I had one go insane a while ago, the phone was lit up with his angry phone calls and texts. In that case I blocked him on my phone carrier's website because he was so abusive, but that was unusual. And 2nd OP - Yes, it is a good idea not to friend someone on Facebook if you are doing a dating app, be it OLD or not. I learned that the hard way. I took down my phone number from the site so others could not find me that way and do just that.
ElizabethIII Posted November 18, 2016 Posted November 18, 2016 I had a guy do this for about 2 years. Just when you think he had gone, you got another email or text. In the end he only copied me into group emails or group texts but I saw straight through it. It was deliberate to try and make me reply it was no accident. Just ignore, eventually he gave up. 1
Author mortensorchid Posted November 20, 2016 Author Posted November 20, 2016 Damn seems like a stalker. Block him. Actually I did block him. A while ago. I double checked my block list and sure enough his name is there and he can't even see my Facebook posts. I wonder if he realizes this. Then again maybe he has another profile and is checking up on me that way and I don't know about it. It's a tangled web we weave. But I will continue to ignore him until he decides this is a lost cause. He doesn't have that in his mind yet but he will eventually. I hope.
Author mortensorchid Posted November 22, 2016 Author Posted November 22, 2016 And the more I think about it, the more I think I should trust my gut with that photo of him and that gal I went to high school with. Anyone who would want to be friends with her is just plain strange. Hence the situation.
freckles14 Posted November 22, 2016 Posted November 22, 2016 If you ignore him it will be okay because he should stop messaging you and trying to get in contact. if it went no where the first time, i doubt it will go anywhere this time. as for the high school friend thing, they could've worked together or something. I don't think it really plays a big role in this situation.
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