savvy2008 Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 My ex and I broke up a year ago. We dated for 8 months. Recently I got in touch with him tell him I've got no hard feelings and don't want it to be awkward anymore. (we work for the same company, just different locations) He responded saying he wanted to move forward to being friends. Since then, he invited me over twice. I went both times. The first time was fine, but it felt like he was leaning in a lot, trying to touch me, etc. He gave me lengthy hugs at the beginning and end of the night. After that, he occasionally called me pet names that he did when we were dating, through texting. When I went over the second time, he basically tried to have sex with me. I stopped it from happening and asked him what he was doing. He said he didn't know. But then he just cuddled with me, no trying to go further. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips and said I should spend the night so I don't have to drive home late. Why would he want me to do that if I turned him down for sex? A couple days later I told him we needed to talk about what happened, that I am looking for a long term relationship at this point and not something casual. He apologized and said he wanted to talk face to face because he owed it to me. That ways days ago. We've texted every day since then. Once he told me to call him if I was available to talk, so I did, expecting him to maybe talk about what happened. Instead he talked about normal day to day things. when we were on the phone, he mentioned 3 or 4 times that we dated. For exaple he'd say "do you remember when we were dating we did this or that" or "I remember you did that when we dated". Why would he do that? What does this mean? I'm so confused. It seems like he wants a casual thing but then he does other things that make me think he wants the relationship back. I don't know what I would say to that honestly. Can anyone offer some advice?
Author savvy2008 Posted November 16, 2016 Author Posted November 16, 2016 I should also say that the reason we broke up was because he randomly came over one night saying that he didn't know how to do relationships, needed to be alone to figure out how to stop from pushing people away, and stop being passive aggressive. I never understood it. Not to mention most recently he tried to reconnect with my best friends fiance, he was friends with the guy when we dated. He also told one of our mutual coworkers to "tell her hi, if she cares". As if I were the one that broke up with him.
TheTraveler Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 He wants back in your pants by all means necessary 2
travelbug1996 Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 What do you want? Sounds like you're just as confused as he is. You're going over to his house, so you should know he's a horny guy so he's probably gonna make a move. If you want to just be friends, do things outside his house.
GustavoWoltmann Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 I agree with travelbug1996, if you want to be just only friends then you should not spent more times together with him like you are a couple. First you need to move on and don't go to his house or invite him to yours. According to your narration, I think he's not feeling love but lust on you. Don't be confuse, try just do the things you usually do without him. Don't text him too much. I read from some books that if you spend more time to a person, there is a good chance that you will him that person. I don't know the publisher of the said book but I agree on that. I hope that helps. Advice from Gustavo Woltmann of Panama City.
dumbass2 Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 Just ask him when face to face not over phone or text. If he is wishy washy then you need to decide if you can just be friends and be able to see him and not think romantically about him. If not, then you need a firm answer from him if he is ready and wants to fully try again and if not, then move on a do not contact again. I don't sense that you two can just be friends.
stillafool Posted November 16, 2016 Posted November 16, 2016 The only sure way you will know he wants you back is he will say to you, "I made a mistake and I want to get back together with you." Anything short of that is just words. He certainly didn't hint around when he wanted to break up with you, did he? It's over and for your own sake, move on.
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