Is she Cheating?

[GoingzOn]

I know that there's not areal way to tell if your spouse is cheating unless you catch them in the act. However there appears to be times when my spouses lips appear somewhat distorted, swollen in places, she always appears to be stretching and grimacing her mouth, sucking on her own lips as if trying to manipulate a certain lip shape. It weird and annoying. Keep in mind, that during the weekend this behavior stops but during her work week she starts this behavior all over again and I'm wondering if she giving BJ's at the office...?

[WilyWill]

It could just be a nervous habit brought on by stress at work. I chew on the sides of my tongue while I do stressful computer work sometimes.

 

If your relationship is healthy, why would she cheat on you? Are there other signs? Is she texting a lot? Trying to keep her phone from your view, or putting it down quickly when you enter the room? Have you looked at your phone bill for an unusual volume of calls or texts?

[Poutrew]

Well, yeah, you're right. She could be doing mouth exercises to be able to put some guy's Pepsi can in there without tearing her mouth in half. Or she could be stressed at work and be just developing nervous habits... So what does your wife's breath smell like when she gets home? You can always looks for dried semen in her hair or a dried drop on her blouse she forgot to clean up... that's what busted President Clinton, from what I hear. Good enough for the Prez, good enough for your wife - only you can decide.

[aileD]

Are you kidding me?

 

It's probably something she does when she's stressed, hence not doing it so much on weekends.

[BaileyB]

Seriously? You have a very overactive imagination...

[mikeylo]

Lol ! That's all I can say.

[fenix]

Is there any other sign that makes you think that she may be cheating? Is she acting more secretive or keeping her phone with her at all times? Has she changed on her behavior towards you? Usually people perceive small changes in their partners that they can't explain and describe and maybe the lips is what is calling your attention the most... if your only worry is what she does with her lips... then I wouldn't worry too much but if there are other signs then probably you should let us know so we can try to be of any help.

[GoldenR]

I think you're being paranoid. Unless there's a guy she works with whose penis is 6 inches wide.

[KimJ1234]

This must be a joke.

[Jump Through Loops]

Possibly a sign of drug use?

[Doorstopper]

Maybe you should ask for a blow job and she what does with her lips afterwards ... or you could just ask her what she's doing, when you see this behavior.

[jenkins95]

She makes strange shapes with her lips and you conclude that she's practising to give good bjs? Wow, that must be the very definition of paranoid! Unless there are lots of other red flags that she could be cheating?

 

There could be many reasons - perhaps she's just spreading her lip gloss like women do! Who knows, perhaps she's secretly learning to play the trumpet or the trombone? Don't necessarily assume that the pink oboe is her instrument of choice!

 

Good luck op - and keep us informed on developments!

Edited November 15, 2016 by jenkins95

[GoingzOn]

It's possible that I could be paranoid totally losing it but I can assure you that I have good reason to question.

 

 

She highly protective of her cell phone and noticed from her old cell phone activity that she uses snap chat alot. The cell phone bill shows numerous texting over 242 text messages from her boss. Keep in mind she is his personal admin assistant on his pay roll. Has a seemingly flexible schedule 30 hours a week but gets full time pay. Noticed she has received email date match info from three different dating sites as well Eharmony, Senior People Meet and Match.com. Strangly, I wasn't able to fully open the email to see her username credential. The next day there was no trace of the email but I did take a screen shot for potential follow-up just not sure if that is going to help.

 

That said, I could be reading into things too much maybe she was just dealing with a moment of curiosity.

Edited November 16, 2016 by GoingzOn
added Red Flags.

[LivingWaterPlease]

It's possible that I could be paranoid totally losing it but I can assure you that I have good reason to question.

 

 

She highly protective of her cell phone and noticed from her old cell phone activity that she uses snap chat alot. The cell phone bill shows numerous texting over 242 text messages from her boss. Keep in mind she is his personal admin assistant on his pay roll. Has a seemingly flexible schedule 30 hours a week but gets full time pay. Noticed she has received email date match info from three different dating sites as well Eharmony, Senior People Meet and Match.com. Strangly, I wasn't able to fully open the email to see her username credential. The next day there was no trace of the email but I did take a screen shot for potential follow-up just not sure if that is going to help.

 

That said, I could be reading into things too much maybe she was just dealing with a moment of curiosity.

 

You had all this and the only thing you put in your first post to ask for feedback on is lip stretching?

[BluesPower]

Do you have any more info you want to share???

 

Would have been good to have your last post first.

 

Yeah, she is probably screwing her boss. At least her boss and maybe some more people, but defiantly her boss.

[Lion Heart]

I've been on this Infidelity forum for over 18 months.

 

Never once have I seen a Thread started by an OP "wondering" if their spouse is cheating - even with THE MOST subtle descriptions mentioned at first, that turned out INNOCENT.

 

So OP you must follow your instincts on this.

 

You already know somewhere in your gut and mind and heart that your wife is cheating.

 

You need to read up on the Cheater's Handbook 101 to see all the techniques a cheater uses PRONTO.

 

It's sad that you've been mind-f***ed by your W then come here to get more of the same.

 

Indeed a Cheater WOULD have you believe you are paranoid. They LOVE to say that you are imagining things.

 

Heavens, I was only having DREAMS of my H having sex with OW for 5 years. No other signs at all THEN. Because I actually WASN'T suspicious at all. But somewhere in my mind I must've been putting things together to manifest those dreams.

 

And the very WEEK those dreams started was the same week he had started in on physical affairs.

 

So please, know that you are sane.

Only an insane person would keep tolerating this behaviour.

 

Do all you can to find out more but it's a horrible time for you. I'm sorry you're going through this.

 

You WERE VERY SMART getting a screenshot of evidence on Dating sites! WTF?? A MARRIED WOMAN on dating sites?

 

Buddy she's cheating all right. Get yourself tested for STDs. Some can be transmitted orally. Look after YOUR sexual health for your next woman.

(After a number of my dreams and my WHs INSISTENCE he loved me and the kids and would NEVER have an affair, I took myself off to the GP anyway without telling WH and had full screen STD checks. Not to PROVE he was having an A! But to make SURE that I was indeed "clean").

 

Good luck!!! So many people here have been where you are.

My advice besides the above is:

A) get all your ducks in a row for divorce (whether it happens or not is not only up to you)

B) change all joint credit cards into separate names...use any excuse you want.

C) separate as many utility accounts as possible

D) detach from joint names in car finances, insurances etc.

E) I moved money immediately on my D Day. If I'd had evidence like yours I would've been far better prepared. I kept moving all my inheritance out of our joint account. We were still legally M during reconciliation. No biggie there.

F) get as much Legal knowledge in your head as possible about D, children, assets.

 

Google Laws in your State and read stories of people who've come through WELL and how they did it.

Explicit Law here is that parents get 50/50.

Fine print in Law states that many BEHAVIOURS of wayward spouses (WSs) can be used against them in D and child custody for the faithful parent to actually get the lot (more or less).

 

KNOW LAW. It's your best ally.

 

Lion Heart

[CommittedToThis]

I used to catch my ex breathing; I wondered if maybe she was practicing for when she could be with another man.

[Friskyone4u]

It's possible that I could be paranoid totally losing it but I can assure you that I have good reason to question.

 

 

She highly protective of her cell phone and noticed from her old cell phone activity that she uses snap chat alot. The cell phone bill shows numerous texting over 242 text messages from her boss. Keep in mind she is his personal admin assistant on his pay roll. Has a seemingly flexible schedule 30 hours a week but gets full time pay. Noticed she has received email date match info from three different dating sites as well Eharmony, Senior People Meet and Match.com. Strangly, I wasn't able to fully open the email to see her username credential. The next day there was no trace of the email but I did take a screen shot for potential follow-up just not sure if that is going to help.

 

That said, I could be reading into things too much maybe she was just dealing with a moment of curiosity.

 

 

OP<

 

Forget her facial motions. You have enough red flags above to start a bull fighting school. If you google "Signs you wife is cheating" probably the first one that will come up is locking and being attached to the phone.

 

And on dating sites. ??? Give me a break.

 

If you read the books on infidelity you will understand the workplace is the new breeding grounds for affairs, so my advice to you is to get yourself a VAR and put it in her car. You will get your answers probably within a week. If she is having an affair, she will be talking to him or one of her girlfriends while in the car.

 

Understand that if you do this you NEVER reveal how you know anything and you MUST be prepared to hear some really hurtful ****.

 

Now before the bull **** starts, yes VAR's are technically not legal in many states but you have a better chance of getting hit by lightning that any competent ant attorney taking a clients money prosecuting anyone for this.

 

If you spend any time reading this or any other forum you will see how many folks have used this tool to uncover affairs.

[CommittedToThis]

the workplace is the new breeding grounds for affairs

 

It figures, right when my company starts us working from home.

[GoingzOn]

It figures, right when my company starts us working from home.

 

 

Wow... Ok... Hold on... She has always had the option to work from home and that was part of the agreement when she started for him.

 

 

CommittedToThis,

 

 

How did you assume that she also worked from home???

[CommittedToThis]

Wow... Ok... Hold on... She has always had the option to work from home and that was part of the agreement when she started for him.

 

 

CommittedToThis,

 

 

How did you assume that she also worked from home???

 

I didn't assume anything, I work from home myself and was making a joke about "no wonder I'm not getting laid at the office". I have no idea about where your partner works.

 

Do you believe me or are you going to hold this against her, too?

[GoingzOn]

I didn't assume anything, I work from home myself and was making a joke about "no wonder I'm not getting laid at the office". I have no idea about where your partner works.

 

Do you believe me or are you going to hold this against her, too?

 

 

I actually thought you were going to talk about how it may be a common thing to be expected from employers and personal assistants... That's all, because you mentioned the working from home thing.