guest00 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 OK, I have been seeing this girl non-stop for the last 6 months. Recently we moved in together. She confesses her love for me, and how much I mean to her etc. But she often gets into moods where she is distant, non-communicative, non-affectionate and basically acting as more of my roommate than anything else! She is a very guarded person, and by no means an open book. Recently, she told me that she isnt sure about a future with me, and wants to wait and see what happens with us. She said this, after she continually tells me how much she loves me, and wants to be with me! Why is that!?!? She frustrates me a great deal, and I am very much a communicator. I am beginning to doubt much of what she has said about a future together etc etc. But, basically I get the feeling that I do not make her happy, even though I do everything I can for her, and tell her in response how much I love her and want a future with her. Any thoughts about this? Should I just take a non-committed approach and see how things work out? I mean, I have told her everything about my feelings, so she knows what I am like ...
JS17 Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 why are you living together after only being together for 6 months?
Pocky Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 When two people move in together there is going to be a period of adjustment. My husband and I experienced this for several months after we moved in together. We had dated about eight months before getting an apartment (and that was in a LD relationship). Living together is a big step for some people and the reality of being in such a committed relationship can be stressful and often overwhelming. You're both trying to establish your role in your new home and establish your relationship as live-in lovers. It's understandable that at times she may feel stifled and need some distance from you. I don't think you should worry too much about doubting her feelings. More than likely she means what she says if she's actually moved in, but you need to keep in mind that this could be drastic change for her and now you're talking about spending your future together. One step at at time! Live in the present for now and enjoy sharing a life with her. You can talk about the future after you've both become accustomed to living together.
UCFKevin Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Wait a minute, wait a minute. A woman said one thing and thought another?
Jennifer'sSecret Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 I lived with a boyfriend once after six months. I'll never live with another boyfriend again...it's too hard to get out of.
centered Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Originally posted by guest00 She confesses her love for me, and how much I mean to her etc. But she often gets into moods where she is distant, non-communicative, non-affectionate and basically acting as more of my roommate than anything else! I have to ask the obvious question. Have you told *her* that you love her? If not, she's probably dealing with a fair amount of emotional stress wondering where the relationship is headed. If she has already told you she loves you, and you aren't ready to say it back, then she'll constantly be second-guessing the relationship until she feels more secure in knowing you love her, too.
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Originally posted by guest00 Recently, she told me that she isnt sure about a future with me, and wants to wait and see what happens with us. This is a key phrase she is saying.. Listen to her, If she is saying this she is just not confused.. she is asking to slow down on the future plans till she can recollect her thoughts. 6 Months is kinda fast to be living together flawlessly .. she may have to adjust
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