Seek3r Posted November 10, 2016 Posted November 10, 2016 There is a girl (21F) on a 16 month internship at my work. I am 23. She is from another city in the same province. She would come to my office like every hour and talk. We're not in the same department either so we have nothing in common work wise. She is a bit of a chatty/outgoing person. I didn't notice at first but her questions seemed really odd and personal. One time she even wanted to compare heights with me (we're both Asian and I'm short but around the same height as her). This other time we saw a Asian girl and she asked me what I would rate her on a scale of 1-10. So I went digging and found she has a boyfriend of about 1.5 years. They both live together and are on internships here. I asked her who she lives with here and she got really embarassed and quiet. She never mentions him around me but she does to other interns that I interact with. We also had lunch a few times and she brought me a pie she made and we shared it WTF. This is where we also told each other about our dating lives. She told me she's not a clingy person (which I thought was strange because she was always around me) and I told her I'm not dating anyone (she immediately got elated and said why not?) Now here's where it got even more weird. she would invade my personal space when she talked to me. Also when i told her i dont get along with this girl at work she asked "was it a love story?". She would look at my monitor and ask who it is that i was talking to on Skype. There was a get-together with the other interns and I couldn't go as I had plans. I heard her boyfriend didn't go and first day back at work she asks me "were you on a date?". She seemed really jealous and kept hounding me about it: a intern made a joke and said "what's his name?" But she just stood there iron willed and didn't even crack a smile. One day she told me a guy was hitting on her and she showed me the conversation and said "whys he doing this. I'm already dating!" And I told her "you should lead him on" (poking fun at what I thought she was doing to me) was she trying to get me jealous by doing that? This other time I was to have lunch with a bunch of coworkers and I asked her if I would be driving, she then asked "is your car a 4 seater?" But we ended up going in separate vehicles (sounds like she didn't want to be alone with me) Around this time she started touching and nudging me on the shoulder more. Some of our dialogue got really strange too - we were talking about horror movies and she said she can't watch them without her mom to protect her. (I was thinking.. "WTF...but what about her boyfriend?") one day she didn't visit me at all until the last minute and said "it feels different not visiting you today, but you didn't notice did you?". It's also weird because in group settings she ignores me. She also added other guys on Facebook but didn't add me. So, I have morals and my head is telling me to avoid her and this whole thing. I mean, what kind of girl in a committed relationship (living together) makes advances to another guy? I hear similar situations like this and a majority of them say the girl just wants attention and validation but it really does seem like she liked me. I'm just confused as to how she can still be dating if she can pull this kind of stuff behind her bfs back, like it doesn't sound like they're too serious or anything? I try to be friendly to her but I never initiate anything with her. This guy intern tells me she just wants friends and there's no way she could like me since she has a boyfriend. I'm basically distancing myself/ignoring her as I like her and she lives with the guy and is a coworker, so it's just a horrible situation overall. The guy intern told me she asked him why I'm being so weird and why I never talk to her. She sounds like she doesn't know what she did wrong LOL Now a few weeks later she doesn't do any of this anymore. She looks down when she sees me and avoids me. Could she have been embarassed that I didn't chase/make a move, so it hurt her ego? So what exactly happened? -Was her relationship rocky and she was looking for a way out (but now they're okay?) -Was I just being used for attention because her boyfriend didn't provide it to her? -did she actually like me and want me to chase her? -Was she establishing a backup, and monkey branching?
l8estnews Posted November 10, 2016 Posted November 10, 2016 What made you post your situation here? Are you having feelings with the girl already? Because if you don't, you'll just brush it off. But the fact that it made you register in this forum and bothered to write your story, then something is already bothering you that much.
niji Posted November 10, 2016 Posted November 10, 2016 So what exactly happened? -Was her relationship rocky and she was looking for a way out (but now they're okay?) -Was I just being used for attention because her boyfriend didn't provide it to her? -did she actually like me and want me to chase her? -Was she establishing a backup, and monkey branching? All of these are possible. There are girls (or guys, but the one I witnessed was female) who flirt with many men (at the same time) with absolutely 0 attraction towards them (their own word: "he repulses me") but love the attention. They would lead the men on, and when someone asks why they do this, they say things like, "It's their fault they were dumb enough to fall for casual flirting". Typically, these people are in some kind of personal or relationship crisis, and interactions with/attention from other males provide a temporary distraction from their problems they'd rather not deal with. As soon as they move on, these men are wiped out clean from their lives with 0 regret. 1
Author Seek3r Posted November 10, 2016 Author Posted November 10, 2016 That's messed up. I can't imagine why people do that. Like she owes it to herself and her bf to fix the relationship first
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