GoreSP Posted November 10, 2016 Posted November 10, 2016 he is likely to oogle attractive women in real life The surprise is that EVERY heterosexual man is doing this regardless of their FB behavior Some are just more discreet. heterosexual women oogle, gay men oogle, gay women oogle, pansexual men and women oogle. 1
No_Go Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 heterosexual women oogle, gay men oogle, gay women oogle, pansexual men and women oogle. True. I thought that hetero men aand gay women will oogle the attractive women mostly, but thinking harder - I (hereto woman) oogle attractive women as well, even just to compare with the competition
BikerAccnt Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 Does anyone get jealous when your siginficant other likes or hearts members of the opposite sex profile pictures and posts? Is it a stupid thing to worry about? Pretty much a stupid thing to worry about. Do you worry if she "hearts" her girlfriends posts?
OatsAndHall Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 Social media is not a serparate entity of anything. It's controlled by people that own the accounts. The way a bf acts on social media is not something that's completely separate of how he acts in real life. For example, if he "likes" provocative, attractive female pictures on FB, he is likely to oogle attractive women in real life. It may not be dealbreaker for everyone but I would rather have that information. Men will also often claim that you have "missinterpreted" something to save their a$$. If you have nothing to hide, hide nothing. Trust me, I have had my issues with social media in relationships and am extremely conservative when it comes to it. I don't post "like" or "heart" other women's pictures and rarely even do so on their meme posts. However, there may be times when a significant other does "like" or "heart" a picture of a woman harmlessly. It may be an old childhood or family friend. There are many ways this can be misconstrued or read into. With that being said, the OP needs to bring this up with their significant other if they take an issue with it and establish a boundary. And, if that boyfriend takes exception to it then she may need to call it off with them.
Author whatwhit Posted November 17, 2016 Author Posted November 17, 2016 Once things seem to get better in my relationship another thing pops up. Is it normal to feel upset when your boyfriend adds there ex girlfriend on Facebook or accepts a invitation. I'm just so confused apparently this chick put him in 10 thousand dollar debt and was in a toxic relationship. She reached out to him while we just had started dating tell him she's sorry for how she treated him. I think it's been about 2 or 3 years since they've dated. She lives in another state too. But I just feel kind of disrespected, because I know he would know that I would be bothered by this. How should I bring this up if I even should bring this up. We have been throUgh some hard times and I wish I could bring this up in way it's not argumentive.
IfonlyIknew Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 She's a closed door on his past I agree there is no reason for him to add her. If he respects you, he will make things right. If he doesn't, then you know where you stand. How to go about it? I would say something along the lines of "I noticed you added your ex" let him do the talking from there. Then say how you feel with out accusing him of motives. "I feel like the past should stay in the past"
kendahke Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 I do have a tendency to be jealous and insecure. . Why? How was this triggered the first time you realized it was happening? What do you expect for your boyfriend to do when you're jealous and insecure? What expectations do you have for yourself when you're feeling jealous and insecure? To say "I'm jealous and insecure" and do nothing about it really isn't saying much. That phrase needs to be followed by "...and I'm working with a therapist on getting to the root of my problem".
kendahke Posted November 17, 2016 Posted November 17, 2016 (edited) Once things seem to get better in my relationship another thing pops up. Is it normal to feel upset when your boyfriend adds there ex girlfriend on Facebook or accepts a invitation. I'm just so confused apparently this chick put him in 10 thousand dollar debt and was in a toxic relationship. She reached out to him while we just had started dating tell him she's sorry for how she treated him. I think it's been about 2 or 3 years since they've dated. She lives in another state too. But I just feel kind of disrespected, because I know he would know that I would be bothered by this. How should I bring this up if I even should bring this up. We have been throUgh some hard times and I wish I could bring this up in way it's not argumentive. What are his feelings about leaving the girl alone? Why can't you bring this up without arguing about it? Here's where you are: he's determined to do a certain thing. You are determined to feel a way about that certain thing. The certain thing isn't going to vanish just because you're melting down. You need to own your voice and put it to him: why does he need to keep in touch on social media with his toxic ex? If he gets touchy behind that, then you've got the answer you're trying really, really hard to avoid hearing and seeing because you don't want to have to start over in a new relationship. Well, this one isn't working and you're wasting your youth in it. It's time for you to rethink this bad policy of wanting to stay with someone with whom you are too afraid to stand in your truth and speak. This has been a bad idea from the start and perhaps you both need to face the fact that some things never come together, no matter how badly you think you want/need it in your life. You don't. Relationships should not be a constant fight and being afraid of speaking your truth because you're so scared someone you're not compatible with is going to walk out the door. Let him go, then. Find someone else who doesn't bring a fight or arguments from day one. Edited November 17, 2016 by kendahke
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