Gaeta Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 One date at a time, just like you said. I'll ask her if she's free tomorrow (she was going to check with her parents but hasn't got back to me yet) How old is her child? Is she tight financially? I am asking because she should not be at the mercy of her parents availability, a woman that wants to date has to have a babysitter on stand by. If she wants to go out on dates with you on weekly basis at some point she'll feel she's taking advantage of her parents.
Author hawks1988 Posted November 11, 2016 Author Posted November 11, 2016 That comment I am less crazy about. She should not be mentioning her ex of 3 years ago and even less comparing you to him. Lets put it all on she has not dated in a while although I did not date for 7 years and even I knew to not bring up exs during a first date. no she told me about her ex before our date. He treated her very poorly.
Author hawks1988 Posted November 11, 2016 Author Posted November 11, 2016 How old is her child? Is she tight financially? I am asking because she should not be at the mercy of her parents availability, a woman that wants to date has to have a babysitter on stand by. If she wants to go out on dates with you on weekly basis at some point she'll feel she's taking advantage of her parents. Her son is three. She does well for herself financially. But her parents don't mind watching him. They literally live a few blocks from each other.
OatsAndHall Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 My suggestion would be to move very slowly and carefully. Some people have said that she has worked through the emotional issues stemming from the her previous relationship which is true in most cases. However, I have run into situations where it was quite the opposite. I dated a woman who really hadn't been dating for many years as she was waiting for her kids to grow and move out of the house. I respect that as she wanted to put her full attention into them and didn't want to introduce different men into their lives. Her and I hit it off very well after about a month, things began moving quickly for us emotionally and she became spooked abut it and called it off. She knows who she is, has an established life and career but she really wasn't prepared to have strong feelings for anyone. She was ready to go out and meet people, casually date and have fun but got terrified when she started becoming strongly attached to someone. We honestly should have held off on sleeping together for a bit longer as that "cranked it to 11" for both of us.
joseb Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 That comment I am less crazy about. She should not be mentioning her ex of 3 years ago and even less comparing you to him. Lets put it all on she has not dated in a while although I did not date for 7 years and even I knew to not bring up exs during a first date. I agree. And in addition, I think OP you need to relax and go easy on all the complimenting. She probably thinks it's sweet now but she might see it as clingy soon enough. Honestly, I think you are getting way too invested way too quickly. You already thought you wanted a ltr with her before you even met?? I don't care how good a profile is, I'm reserving judgement about if I'm even interested at all until I meet. And I'm definitely not thinking ltr after a first date, no matter how well it went. Slow down! So relax and plan the next date, keep in contact, keep your eyes open and enjoy the process. 1
joseb Posted November 11, 2016 Posted November 11, 2016 A couple of observations : Gaeta, regarding babysitting, it's pretty common in situations without baby daddies that the mum gets into the habit of using her parents for babysitting. Any i've dated have done the same. People say she has had enough time to get over old relationships. That may be true, but it also may be simply that she's been so tired and busy raising a young child she hasn't had time to do much of anything. I dated a single mum in almost exactly the same position, and it was almost like she hadn't had a break from dating at all. Lots if comparing and projecting.
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