Sunflower222 Posted July 12, 2005 Posted July 12, 2005 Hello. I'm new to this website so please bear with me... Here's my story... I met this guy in a grocery store about 6 months ago. The first night i met him it was like love at first site. To make a long story shorter - we started talking on the phone and really hit it off. A month later we started dating and going out all the time. He has a son and i have two kids. He is 35 and i am 32 years old. Well come to find out his ex - the mother of his son lives only four houses down from me. I didn't think this would be any big deal since most people have a civil relationship with the mothers and fathers of their kids usually only for the kids' sake but not with these two. They hate each other. One night while me and this guy were hanging out at my house his ex came down and started freakin out on him about something with his son. After that happened me and him broke up because he said he couldn't deal with her living so close to me. A couple of weeks later i ended up talking to this girl and things were ok with him and her so me and him got back together. Two months after that we broke up again because his best friend and I got really close and he couldn't handle it because his best friend has a track record of flirting with his girlfriends and trying to sleep with them. Being niave as i am i didn't believe him and stayed friends with his best friend after we broke up the second time. Well sure enough my ex was right - his friend did try to sleep with me one night so i ended the friendship (if that's what you could call it). Once my ex found that out we started talking again and got back together. Now last week on a Saturday while walking past his ex's house she and her boyfriend were outside - when they seen me they were like "hey what's up"? I wasn't going to be rude and not say anything and keep walking, so i stopped and said hello and tried to leave but they just kept talking. Well after about 10 minutes of talking I said Ok i have to go talk to you later. Well like 2 hours later they both showed up at my door wanting to hang out - well knowing that my boyfriend could not stand his ex i knew that hanging out and talking with her would not go over well if he found out so i knew i had to get rid of them... Well they ended up talking again for about an hour about nothing and then they left. Well the next day i get a phone call my from my now ex-boyfriend saying he can't deal with me living right down the street from her and really can't deal with me and her hanging out - i tried to explain that it wasn't my fault and we weren't "hanging out" but he was furious and just said it's over - see ya... I was so hurt that he didn't listen to my side of the story that i was like "whatever"... I wrote him a letter explaining what my side was and what happened and left it on his truck... I wasn't going to call him since he was the one that said "it's over". Well a week went by and he called my on saturday to apologize for the way he acted that day when he said it was over. I didn't want to let on that it bothered me so i didn't bring up anything about us getting back together - even though i missed him dearly!! I'm just confused as to "why" he would make the effort to out of the blue just call me up a week later to apologize - why would he care if we aren't together? Is there some other motive he has behind the call? Basically what came out of the call was that we're basically friends and i'm having a really hard time with it because i really care about this guy. A part of me knows that i should just maybe get over it because if he wanted to be with me then he would tell me - right? Is it possible to be friends with your ex when you have feelings for them? What should i do? The worst part of this whole thing is that during this whole time i got really close with his son and his whole family and i miss all of them too!!
sunflower1008 Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 First off, nice name Sunflower So.......let me get this straight.....in a matter of six months, he has broken up with you THREE times? Hmmmmm, sounds like he has some issues, don't you think? He sounds very insecure and obviously, if things don't go his way, he doesn't try to improve them, he simply "breaks up" with you. Maybe this is his pattern? You've only known him six months, but look at all he's put you through already. I think you should move on or at least not be that available to him and see if he gets his act together. Actions speak louder than words, and this guys actions are speaking very loud Sunflower. Big L.
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