anon Posted July 12, 2005 Posted July 12, 2005 My husband and I are divorcing and for a long time I've had no desire for him at all. During the last part of our marriage I wouldn't kiss him, didn't even like it. My feelings for him are dead and I don't love him. The problem is that for some reason, I can't stand the thought of him sleeping with someone else. It seems very selfish and I want to get over this feeling. Why would I care if he has a girlfriend when I don't want him, and divorce is the best thing? We've been together a very long time and dated from an early age, neither of us has much experience with others. How do you deal with jealousy during a divorce and accepting the person you were married to is going to have sexual contact with others? Why is it so difficult when I don't want him?
Merin Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 I dunno a lot of people seem to have this issue.. I've heard it said so many times before that while one person may not want another, they also don't want anyone else to have them.. It's funny when I think of it in another way.. one of my Little People may have a toy that they really don't play with, but holy sh*t let the other Kiddo look interested in playing with that toy and Godforbid pick it up to play with it.. all hell breaks loose! Suddenly the toy that wasn't really loved by the first Kid and wasn't being played with at all becomes VERY attractive and the need to have it all to themself is VERY important. BUT once they get the toy back, they once again have no interest to play with it but are just so damn thankful that thier sib doesn't have it... Where was I going with this... I have wee peeps!
Devildog Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 Originally posted by anon Why is it so difficult when I don't want him? The term selfish comes to mind. You also might be afraid someone will think you were a fool for throwing away the guy. You sound alot like my XW the first time another woman answered my phone when she called. She went ballistic and ended up giving herself a migraine. And it still eats her alive. And she is the one who left me for another man.
SummerRae Posted July 13, 2005 Posted July 13, 2005 I think Merin summed it up perfectly. We want it because suddenly it looks so much more desirable when someone else sees it so......... Just think of virtually every commercial on TV.
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