meeting a girl through referrals

[gotsarzes]

I'm about to go to a dinner party tomorrow with a friend and his wife...they are also bringing along a female friend of theirs who is single. They think it's a good idea for us to get to know eachother and see where things go. I have never really done this before as i'm very independent when it comes to dating. I'm wondering does this sort of blind 'meets' work Specially since the first time you meet is in a group gathering where there might be a match making awkward? vibe. Just to clarify this is not a date but a dinner gathering where we will see eachother.

[smackie9]

My experiences were flops because there was zero attraction. Awkward, yes indeed.

 

The best thing to do is not look at it as a blind meeting thing.....just dinner with friends, no expectations. just be yourself.

[RecentChange]

Hum... I wasn't quite so purposely set up.... but did meet my husband through a common friend.

 

The friend was hosting a big Halloween party, I didn't know many people that would be going, and I also needed a ride there.

 

He said "my friend so and so will be driving by your place on the way, I bet he can give you a ride" - he made some calls and quickly "arranged it".

 

So, the handsome young stranger picked me up at my house and drove me to the party. We had a nice chat on the way, hung out together a bit (untill my girlfriends showed up, and soon wanted to go to another party).

 

I agreed to meet him for a "date" two days later. The rest is history!

[basil67]

I was purposely introduced to my husband by mutual friends.

[mbee]

I met my guy at a group gathering. Ironically he was matched with my friend haha, but we met and clicked right away. Thankfully my friend understood and no feelings/friendship was hurt by it but the group setting was great. Makes it easy to see how you guys interact with friends and I felt like I could be myself when I met my guy. I hate online dating cause you don't know if someone will like X, Y and Z about you, but in a group gathering, you see someone natural and having fun with their friends. So when we did go on our first date, I knew he'd like my silly humor, goofiness and all the things I worry won't come off well when I meet someone online.

 

I wouldn't call that a date, just treat it as a meetup. The date comes afterwards, if you guys decide you want to move forward on that.

[gotsarzes]

Thank you for all the responses. I did go ahead with the dinner get together. There were around 6 people and it was at Lisa's (the girl I'm getting hooked up with) house. As soon as I walked in lisa approached me and gave me a gentle handshake. She is very beautiful, like a 10/10 and way better looking than I expected. So it was a bit intimidating at first but I was then sitting with her on the couch soon and bantering while others were talking among themselves some other part of the house . I think the talking was really good and there was no awkwardness and she would even touch me gently here and there while talking. She also gave me a tour of her house and her comic books collection which I thought was fantastic. When dinnertime came her sister deliberately sat me beside lisa since I was at first hesitating where to sit. During dinner things were good for first few minutes but then I realized she was not making eye contact or being as attentive as before so subsequently I pulled away (not that I was giving her too much attention. I was having a good time and talking and laughing with everyone at the table and didn't single her out with my attention). A couple times she asked me about my interests and such but nothing else came up. Soon after this she explained that she had to attend a girls birthday (who is a far mutual friend of mine). So she left after about a total of 1.5 hours and briefly mentioned to me in front of everyone that "we should go for coffee sometime". I'm not quite sure if she meant that or just said that to make me feel better. When I left the house her sister thanked me for coming and said Lisa was very excited to meet me all week. The biggest problem I found is I never got the chance to get Lisa's phone number.

 

Now I'm wondering how on earth I should contact her. One way which I want to avoid at all costs is getting her number through my friend. The other is to add her on Facebook and to send a message asking if she is doing anything fun or visiting the art gallery (we both love art) she should let me know and maybe I'll join her and I'll also slip in my phone number. Also not sure on how to go about approaching this girl as most of the time the girls I have met have given me more resistance while this girl was openly asking me to ask her out? Am I wrong? Any suggestions would be much appreciated.

[smackie9]

facebook'er

[spideywoman]

Why wouldn't you ask your mutual friends for her number? What am I missing here? It's perfectly normal _ they're the ones who wanted you and Lisa to meet in the first place. Sounds like she would like to see you again. Forget the FB thing. So impersonal. Be confident, get her number and call her. Ask her to go to the art gallery. Or a comic book expo. Whatever. Do not text. I cannot tell you how annoying and off-putting "boyish behavior" is.

[basil67]

It's fine to get the number through your mutual friend. Just tell Lisa that you didn't get her number and friend gave it to you.

[BaileyB]

Ask your friends, they will be pleased to help. Good luck!

[gotsarzes]

Tried the phone number route and she did not answer, left a quick voicemail and hung up. Didn't get a call back. Oh well

[spideywoman]

Tried the phone number route and she did not answer, left a quick voicemail and hung up. Didn't get a call back. Oh well

 

Maybe she's playing the ridiculous 3-day rule game that men usually do whatever happens, you gave it a go. if she doesn't call back, it's her loss. there will be others, i'm sure of it.

 

keep us posted!