MalachiX Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 So, I realize I should probably know this at my age but what's the etiquette for significant others at funerals? Here's the situation: A friend of mine's father died passed away. I only met his father once or twice (I've met the rest of his family on a bunch of times) but he's a great guy who I've known for about five years. My girlfriend (of almost three years) has met my friend a few times but has never met his father. My friend is having a "celebration of life" dinner at his father's favorite resturant and i'm trying to figure out if it would be appropriate to bring my girlfriend. I don't know all the details and I'm not sure if this celebration is meant to take the place of the funeral or is just another event after the funeral. The Facebook invitation didn't mention dates but didn't seem to preclude them. Any idea on this? I feel so bad that my friend just lost his father at a fairly young age so I really don't want to do anything that may seem rude or insensitive.
darkmoon Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 yes, bring her, she is your partner, I would resent the exclusion, tbh unless the host has a very good reason, very, like your girl is unpleasant
GunslingerRoland Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 Well funerals are typically open for people to show support. Since she has met your friend, I would see no issue with her going to the funeral with you to show support for him.... BUT this celebration of life dinner is a different thing. There is a good chance that this is a dinner paid for by the family. You shouldn't be inviting people to something like this.
introverted1 Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 You can bring her to the funeral if you like, but it would be inappropriate to bring her to the dinner, which is likely being paid for by the family, unless she was specifically invited.
Sunkissedpatio Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 Bring her to both, no one is going to be nickle and diming at a time like this. You are there to show support and the fact your partner is there to support you is completely understood. Most funerals have an after reunion with food, dinner, etc. People aren't thinking why did "so and so bring their significant other?" They are just happy to see you there to show your respects and support. Been to many funerals with a partner or I was the partner and it included the dinner part. It's totally acceptable unless they specify "dinner is family only" or the likes. 1
kendahke Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 So, I realize I should probably know this at my age but what's the etiquette for significant others at funerals? Here's the situation: A friend of mine's father died passed away. I only met his father once or twice (I've met the rest of his family on a bunch of times) but he's a great guy who I've known for about five years. My girlfriend (of almost three years) has met my friend a few times but has never met his father. My friend is having a "celebration of life" dinner at his father's favorite resturant and i'm trying to figure out if it would be appropriate to bring my girlfriend. I don't know all the details and I'm not sure if this celebration is meant to take the place of the funeral or is just another event after the funeral. The Facebook invitation didn't mention dates but didn't seem to preclude them. Any idea on this? I feel so bad that my friend just lost his father at a fairly young age so I really don't want to do anything that may seem rude or insensitive. Call and ask your boy just to be on the safe side. Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in some people, so always ask before taking upon yourself to do anything involving those impacted by the death of the loved one.
salparadise Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 She's your partner. If you're invited to a dinner it would be strange indeed for anyone to expect you not to bring her. This is pretty much universal for social invitations. Professional events are somewhat different but that's not relevant here.
Standard-Fare Posted November 1, 2016 Posted November 1, 2016 I don't think anyone would have a bad reaction to your GF coming - or not coming - so I think this all boils down to what your GF herself wants to do. Talk to her honestly about it. You don't have to be like "I'm not even sure you should come to this," but do give her an out in case she doesn't feel comfortable participating. She might come to her own conclusion that the event is meant more for family members and close friends.
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