Asked to meet up at mall and now her brother wants to come...***Updated***

[BasketballLife]

I think the mall is fine for a 16 year old's first date with a girl. I assume there are restaurants, coffee shops, etc. inside the mall so you can buy her a coffee or pop or dessert or something, if you want. Outback (and frankly even Applebee's and Red Lobster) seems a little pricey for a first date for a guy who is probably making minimum wage. Save the dinners for when she is your girlfriend.

 

She might just feel uncomfortable and scared about going on a first date with you, so she wants her brother along for backup. Just go with the flow, be nice to him, and maybe buy him an ice cream. It'll be fine!

 

What I was planning to do.

[BasketballLife]

I asked her Friday, she agreed she couldn't figure out a time. Barely talked Saturday asked what time Sunday and didn't know. Asked again last night and she never replied till 6pm today and it wasn't even about the time. I don't know if she's doing this on purpose, maybe she is in trouble I don't know. Even though I know she's on her phone. (Yes I stalked today). She also asked if her brother could come, I think the reason was to deter me.

[JewelD]

That sounds a bit immature like "hey, I'm have money and I'm willing to spend it on a girl on a first date"

 

Umm, that's generally how it works in the real world so you may as well get used to it now since your days of childhood will quickly draw to a close.

 

And if you had suggested a date at an actual restaurant or movie, her parents probably wouldn't have made her bring her little brother along. Going to the mall sounds like a free-for-all activity.

[MrMeh]

Sorry buddy. Take this as a lesson and know that if a person is eager to meet up, you won't have to keep asking several times because they'll be specific and interested from the start.

[salparadise]

Yea, not worth your time and attention. I don't know why women do this. Maybe they just like the attention. Don't play that game. Move on.

[mortensorchid]

Whatever the reason, it ain't gonna happen. Just move on, it wasn't meant to be. But whatever you do, don't chew her out over it. Keep calm and carry on, carry yourself with dignity and class. Hard to do sometimes, but you'll be better for it.

[transform yourself]

One suggestion is to be leading all the way. You should write a text which asks 2 alternatives and in such a way that she has to choose. This close technique is called the "assumptive close". Please see the example below.

 

"Lets grab some coffee and cake, I know this place which does the best desserts. I can meet Sunday or Tuesday evening, what day is better for you?"

 

Let the woman respond by giving you a day and then reply by saying "Great see you at 7.30pm at (Station/location), dont be late".

 

Job done, Key is to be LEADING. Here is a blogpost with this and also how to text women.

 

Transform-Yourself | Texting Women The Right Way

 

Regards

[Erik30]

You should've suggested a time to meet up. Though I don't think it really matters in this case since she's giving you lame "I don't know" replies, big chance she might have said she couldn't make it at any time you possibly suggested.

 

And she wants her brother to also be there? That's pretty much making clear it's not a date. (Unless you're both still really young and never met in RL) She's not interested, sorry.

[BasketballLife]

Yea, not worth your time and attention. I don't know why women do this. Maybe they just like the attention. Don't play that game. Move on.

 

She literally told me 'I thought you didn't want to hang because of my brother".

[lakerman34]

She literally told me 'I thought you didn't want to hang because of my brother".

 

I would respond, "I wasn't interested in "hanging." I was more interested in taking you out."

 

I don't know. Maybe she's too young to be comfortable with a response like this, but if I EVER want to take a girl out and she thinks it's "just hanging out," well, that doesn't happen. I let them know my intentions of taking them out AS A DATE from the get-go.