Mizz Layta Posted October 27, 2016 Posted October 27, 2016 What are some signs to look for so you don't waste your time on someone who is only coming back to you just because you are familiar and when they have dry spell/lonely or bored only to leave when a better option comes along.
Kelley Posted October 27, 2016 Posted October 27, 2016 I would say that you feel like an option rather than a priority. You will feel like you continually put in the effort and they don't. It takes them forever to call back/text. You are unhappy most of the time. Gut feeling, I know it's a vague one, but my gut told me my ex was cheating and something just wasn't right, it turned out to be correct! 2
freebird31 Posted October 28, 2016 Posted October 28, 2016 If they dated someone after you in which it didn't work out. And now they're coming back to you.
Pete2304 Posted October 28, 2016 Posted October 28, 2016 #4 If you find yourself on an Internet forum for broken relationships asking a rhetorical question. 4
Justm3x Posted October 28, 2016 Posted October 28, 2016 I have to agree with Kelley, they become distant, dont reply when they should, spend way to much with their phone in hand, gut feeling. My ex stopped bringing his work mobile phone home to charge, did it religiously for almost 7 years and then one day it stopped, his brother blocked me from facebook, i was curious but didnt say anything. Then realised why, he was having an affair with his brother friend, she was an old school friend of his.. i was purely a means to an end, he had no where else to go until he met someone else and i became surplus to requirement. 1
basil67 Posted October 28, 2016 Posted October 28, 2016 If they didn't have an actual conversation about getting back together and discuss what went wrong so that it could be addressed this time around. 2
Author Mizz Layta Posted January 16, 2017 Author Posted January 16, 2017 Has anyone ever had an ex who kept coming back in your life only to leave again and again?If so,how did you finally reach a broking point to cut him/her off for good? I just went through this and have finally reached a breaking point
loney_girl Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 I am going through this right now and have reached my breaking point this month. We broke up in September but he continually contacts me to tell me how much he misses me and wants me. He has sent me nudes. But then he'll disappear. At first I thought maybe we were on the way to getting back together but he never means any of it. I'm not sure if he's bored or thinks he is doing me a favour. I can't even guess at his motivation. On New Years eve he sent me a text saying "Happy New Year. We don't know what 2017 has in store for you and I" which was sort of a thing he used to say when we were together. He'd always say things like we can't predict the future and we don't know what the future has in store for us as a couple. That really pissed me off because obviously the future holds nothing for us! He seems to like to string me along with "who knows if we'll get back together. We'll find out in the future. But seriously..... It doesn't work that way.. You want to be together or you don't. I've really just been thinking about his actions the past few days and how much he is toying with my emotions. I always jumped when he contacted me but I've gotten to that point in my head that if I hear from him again, I am not responding. It sucks but we'll get through it!!! 2
keiji Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 (edited) Yes, there's someone who was been on and off in my life for six years (before that we were friends, although there was always a latent tension). We rekindle, have a big fight for a change, and start no contact again. Months or even years later, she'll reappear saying how I'm the man of her life and how much she's missed me. Then her usual behavior reappears too, mainly unjustified jealousy. This happened last July and I said I wouldn't put up with that anymore. She contacted me in September and I stated very clearly that I didn't even want us to be friends. She insisted until December. I saw her a few times at my regular hangout and just said "hi". That was in front of her friends, so I guess she's now taken the hint or at least felt ridiculed (she has the biggest ego ever). I'll do my best to never be treated like that again. Edited January 16, 2017 by keiji
mightycpa Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 Sort of. She kept coming back for more, but wouldn't take the hint that I never wanted to see her again. I finally let her arrange this awesome date which took a great deal of planning, effort and money. Then I stood her up. I never heard from her again after that. That's not your situation, though, is it? You want him to come back and stay forever?
Jj66 Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 Say goodbye, block and ignore. If they keep harassing you then get a restraining order.
Author Mizz Layta Posted January 30, 2017 Author Posted January 30, 2017 We were together on and off for few years and we live 4 hours apart.We had a strong connection but the distance eventually took its toll and he broke it.After time apart we will reconnect and hangout again.This went on and off for few years until he met someone closer.Prior to that he started not treating me with the same level of commitment and enthusiasm that I was extending to him.He would run hot and cold.So when it became apparent that he had new interest closer I told him it's best we go separate ways as it was painful for me to watch him date someone else.He agreed and we cease contact ,expecting not to hear from him again. I went on with my life until this past year I noticed that he sent me a message back in May 2015 through someone's else account since he deleted his own Facebook. He left his number to text him and says he missed me like crazy. I didn't see these messages at that time since I didn't check my message request. Then a month later,he creates a new Facebook. I noticed this because he appeared on people you may know list..The profile had only one pic and 2 friends from his town ... we had no mutual friends. Then the profile disappeared a month later.At this point I was still unaware of the messages he had sent a month ealier.I went on with my life. Then he sent several messages using one of his friends Facebook account this year in 2016 again,saying he misses me and left his number again to text him.For some reason these messages didn't show up at that time.Then a month later he creates another Facebook again .He messaged me saying he misses me. I finally open the messages request that's when I saw all those messages he sent. I thought he genuinely wanted me back based on his level if effort so I texted him back.He was happy to hear from me and said he misses me.We caught up with our lives and exchanged recent pics. It wasn't long before he turned cold again. He started treating me like an afterthought ,not keeping Skype dates,then started acting more flaky by not texting when he said he would etc.He was supposed to come visit me but didn't follow through with it.He gave some bs excuse as to why he can't do this and maybe we might be together in the future.He went dark again and ignored further contact from me.I think there's someone else in the picture I came to a realization that I can't be mad at him anymore at this point.He keeps hurting me because I ultimately run back to him expecting different results.It's been 4 months since and I changed my number after a month of him ditching me again, then deactivated my face book so he can't reach me if he wanted to.I'm so hurt and it this time with greater strength . I can't stop beating myself for running back to him after what he put me through. Why? Why did I think it was a good idea to have contact with him again? That things will be different ?That he will start putting more effort into me and make me a priority? That it will work out again?I feel so stupid and responsible for my own heartbreak. Has anyone been through the same ?How did you recover being hurt over and over by the same person?
mightycpa Posted January 30, 2017 Posted January 30, 2017 Why indeed! Skype date? Wouldn't you rather go out on a real date, you know, where you step foot out of your house? That's where you should put your focus. Try getting a couple of those. Plus, it's a lot easier to gauge interest in somebody whose face you can see.
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