Ilovelifeforwhatcome Posted October 27, 2016 Posted October 27, 2016 I have started seeing a new person and I am falling for him. I haven't felt that feeling since my 1st love (that relationship ended a year ago). My ex and I have had no contact and I haven't seen him since I broke up w/him. He was my 1st love, though I wasn't his, nor did he appreciate that he was my 1st. Since meeting this other guy, I seem to think about my ex more. I did love him, but I am ready for a new love. The 1st 3 months after were the hardest and I couldn't even look at other guys. Is this normal?
scooby-philly Posted October 27, 2016 Posted October 27, 2016 Hey OP, Sorry to hear about your loss....but most people don't go through life without losing someone we love. (I don't mean via death). Anyway - short and sweet - yes it's completely, 100% healthy to think about an ex. And surprisingly, it's normal to do that when you meet the next "person" - because we're hardwired to compare. Now, people will tell you and I would agree - the issue is not avoiding thoughts of the ex or comparing (cause that's impossible and if you don't own it you can damage your psyche) but not letting it linger and if you find yourself thinking ...well compared to (insert x's name) he's (insert adjective) or when I was with (ex) he would do (verb) - stop it! Each person and therefore each relationship you have will be different. If you can learn to communicate early on, then you will be in great shape. Best of luck! 1
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