Inter-racial Dating

[jen1447]

I was raised with all kinds of people from all over the world around me and my family. Beautiful is Beautiful....not about the color of ones skin.

 

And yet ppl's tastes are subjective and we're all entitled to any discretion we want to employ.

[Gr8fuln2020]

And yet ppl's tastes are subjective and we're all entitled to any discretion we want to employ.

 

Agreed. So, not certain what impact this statement was supposed to make.

[Gr8fuln2020]

Even then culture doesn't necessarily get in the way. I had no problems dating a woman that had a different culture to mine. It wasn't an issue and need not be an issue at all.

 

Yeah, if the culture doesn't interfere with fundamental beliefs, compatibility. As humans, we tend to pick and choose what we will tolerate.

 

There isn't a rational reason to date within one's own race. The preference thing is rather irrational. We all have preferences...that observation is obvious. But an earlier poster's observation that not including an entire group of people is a disadvantage to finding someone is absolutely correct. No need to argue against that. WRONG? RIGHT? Neither.

 

Personally, I am abundantly fortunate to find or discover options in all of what humankind has to offer...awesome!

[Gloria25]

I was raised with all kinds of people from all over the world around me and my family. Beautiful is Beautiful....not about the color of ones skin.

 

I didn't wake up one day and say "Umm, I'm gonna date white men only". It just "is".

 

When a black guy talks to me, I am not aroused, I'm not turned on, not interested. Put a good looking white guy, and I'm giddy, flushed, excited.

 

I do believe that it has to do with my dad.

 

Look, our childhoods - even dating experiences as an adult, IMO, have the power to shift us towards a certain preference conscious or subconscious.

 

I've already given examples of my dad and the terrible things he said/did to us. I guess that just turned me off to black men.

[Gloria25]

I didn't wake up one day and say "Umm, I'm gonna date white men only". It just "is".

 

When a black guy talks to me, I am not aroused, I'm not turned on, not interested. Put a good looking white guy, and I'm giddy, flushed, excited.

 

I do believe that it has to do with my dad.

 

Look, our childhoods - even dating experiences as an adult, IMO, have the power to shift us towards a certain preference conscious or subconscious.

 

I've already given examples of my dad and the terrible things he said/did to us. I guess that just turned me off to black men.

 

Also, the cultural differences drive me up the wall. I didn't grow up like them, I don't "get" them.

 

Last night (again) they had "Black Jeopardy" on SNL and that skit is sorta like me. I hear black people talk and think certain things and I just don't get where they are coming from. And, it's not just black people. I feel the same way about a lot of things that are common/natural to whites and hispanics. I guess, I'm an oddball cuz I've been exposed to a little of each culture, but not engrained 100% to what people would consider typical conduct, beliefs, etc. of blacks, whites, and/or hispanics.

[stillafool]

 

I was raised with all kinds of people from all over the world around me and my family. Beautiful is Beautiful....not about the color of ones skin.

 

I'm a black woman (the color of honey) I am insanely sexually attracted to black men the color of midnight. Those are the only black men that I'm attracted to. Now, I am also sexually attracted to white men with fair skin and red hair as well as blonde men with fair skin. So I disagree that it isn't the color of ones skin that makes one attracted.

[Gloria25]

Also, the cultural differences drive me up the wall. I didn't grow up like them, I don't "get" them.

 

Last night (again) they had "Black Jeopardy" on SNL and that skit is sorta like me. I hear black people talk and think certain things and I just don't get where they are coming from. And, it's not just black people. I feel the same way about a lot of things that are common/natural to whites and hispanics. I guess, I'm an oddball cuz I've been exposed to a little of each culture, but not engrained 100% to what people would consider typical conduct, beliefs, etc. of blacks, whites, and/or hispanics.

 

Geesh, like the other day one of my relatives said that I put on my vehicle something that white guys put on there. I was clueless. All I know/knew is I saw the accessory and put it on my vehicle cuz I liked how it looked....I didn't do it consciously to be white, black, or anything.

[Gloria25]

I'm a black woman (the color of honey) I am insanely sexually attracted to black men the color of midnight. Those are the only black men that I'm attracted to. Now, I am also sexually attracted to white men with fair skin and red hair as well as blonde men with fair skin. So I disagree that it isn't the color of ones skin that makes one attracted.

 

Lol...

 

The only black guy I'd date would be Wesley Snipes, Will Smith, or Denzel Washington.

 

But still, in real life, black guys simply do not turn me on. I just don't feel it and will not try to "force" it by trying to get to know the person. That would be the same of me trying to get with a white guy who I didn't find attractive.

[stillafool]

Lol...

 

The only black guy I'd date would be Wesley Snipes, Will Smith, or Denzel Washington.

 

But still, in real life, black guys simply do not turn me on. I just don't feel it and will not try to "force" it by trying to get to know the person. That would be the same of me trying to get with a white guy who I didn't find attractive.

 

Gloria, is it their personalities that you find unattractive or the color of their skin?

[Gr8fuln2020]

I didn't wake up one day and say "Umm, I'm gonna date white men only". It just "is".

 

When a black guy talks to me, I am not aroused, I'm not turned on, not interested. Put a good looking white guy, and I'm giddy, flushed, excited.

 

I do believe that it has to do with my dad.

 

Look, our childhoods - even dating experiences as an adult, IMO, have the power to shift us towards a certain preference conscious or subconscious.

 

I've already given examples of my dad and the terrible things he said/did to us. I guess that just turned me off to black men.

 

I appreciate your response. I believe that a lot has to do with our upbringing and those around us who fundamentally helped shape our view of the world as we developed. I have friends who grew up in very diverse quarters and still prefer to date within their own race...again...preference. No right or wrong.

 

Also, the cultural differences drive me up the wall. I didn't grow up like them, I don't "get" them.

 

Last night (again) they had "Black Jeopardy" on SNL and that skit is sorta like me. I hear black people talk and think certain things and I just don't get where they are coming from. And, it's not just black people. I feel the same way about a lot of things that are common/natural to whites and hispanics. I guess, I'm an oddball cuz I've been exposed to a little of each culture, but not engrained 100% to what people would consider typical conduct, beliefs, etc. of blacks, whites, and/or hispanics.

 

Stereotypes are so corrosive. This culture, the USA, has a mastery of emphasizing stereotypical behavior to the point where so many believe that everyone of that particular 'race' behaves that way. Destructive and an ingrained part of this country's history.

 

I'm a black woman (the color of honey) I am insanely sexually attracted to black men the color of midnight. Those are the only black men that I'm attracted to. Now, I am also sexually attracted to white men with fair skin and red hair as well as blonde men with fair skin. So I disagree that it isn't the color of ones skin that makes one attracted.

 

Glad you disagree with that...b/c I never suggested that the color of one's skin did not matter. That statement you misread was MY OWN PERSONAL POV. It would be absurd to suggest that, in general, the color ones skin had nothing to do with what we do or do not prefer.

[jen1447]

I was raised with all kinds of people from all over the world around me and my family. Beautiful is Beautiful....not about the color of ones skin.

 

And yet ppl's tastes are subjective and we're all entitled to any discretion we want to employ.

 

Agreed. So, not certain what impact this statement was supposed to make.

 

I'm a black woman (the color of honey) I am insanely sexually attracted to black men the color of midnight. Those are the only black men that I'm attracted to. Now, I am also sexually attracted to white men with fair skin and red hair as well as blonde men with fair skin. So I disagree that it isn't the color of ones skin that makes one attracted.

 

Glad you disagree with that...b/c I never suggested that the color of one's skin did not matter. That statement you misread was MY OWN PERSONAL POV. It would be absurd to suggest that, in general, the color ones skin had nothing to do with what we do or do not prefer.

 

Ok thanks for verifying ....it looked like you had said you thought skin color objectively didn't matter.

[ChickiePops]

I am white and I am not attracted to men of other races. I did date outside my race twice - once an Asian man who really screwed things up and forever tainted me from going down that path (because I was curious), and I had a Jewish bf years ago. Otherwise I do not date outside my race.

 

Oddly enough, I have a FWB who says he only prefers to date outside his race, he's white, and he's had more sex with me than with any other woman in his whole life. Life is complicated.

 

Judaism is a religion and a culture, it is not a race.

[Got it]

Also, the cultural differences drive me up the wall. I didn't grow up like them, I don't "get" them.

 

Last night (again) they had "Black Jeopardy" on SNL and that skit is sorta like me. I hear black people talk and think certain things and I just don't get where they are coming from. And, it's not just black people. I feel the same way about a lot of things that are common/natural to whites and hispanics. I guess, I'm an oddball cuz I've been exposed to a little of each culture, but not engrained 100% to what people would consider typical conduct, beliefs, etc. of blacks, whites, and/or hispanics.

 

I don't' understand this. There are so many people in different ethnicities that there is no "one" way they all act.

 

I have black friends, but they are very different. One is from Ethiopia, another born and raised upper class in the US. Neither is like the SNL skit you are referencing though the US born one would be more understanding of the cultural pieces than the non native.

 

My husband is hispanic, I am white. While our cultures add elements/spice to our background and history, they have little direct impact. My husband is far more "New York" than he is "Puerto Rican".

 

The human race is made up of a wide spectrum of individuals with their own thinking styles, backgrounds, ideas and desires. I find it to be lazy thinking to draw broad brushes based on color of skin or country of origin.

 

For myself, I have always been attracted to dark hair men than light haired. Outside of that, there was no cultural/physical requirements. What I have always looked for was a sharp wit, good sense of humor, driven, and caring individual which can be found in many cultures and countries.

[Got it]

Gaeta, 30 years ago interracial dating was very popular. Maybe because I was in Los Angeles back then but it was everywhere. I'm from Virginia and it was popular in my high school. There were quite a few interracial couples at my prom. I don't know what part of the country you live in but this wasn't the case where I lived.

 

Another native Virginian. I am assuming you are not referencing the Richmond/southern side of Virginia and diversity.

 

I too grew up in a very diverse part of Virginia and there were many multiracial couples/kids that we grew up with. One of the reasons my parents moved to the DC area was for it's more diverse make up.

[sandylee1]

Interesting that you're a w/m who's mainly into b/f, just bc IME that's one of the less common matchups.

 

For me it's mainly about phases ....I've gone thru a variety.

 

Not in the part of UK where I live. It's very multicultural. Lots of WM/BW.

[sandylee1]

I don't' understand this. There are so many people in different ethnicities that there is no "one" way they all act.

 

THIS EXACTLY ^^^^^^

 

 

To say that everyone of a particular ethnic group or skin colour behaves the same, is just incredibly narrow minded and ignorant.

 

That's the kind of thinking that creates discrimination.

 

I'm black. There are many black people who behave and have different attitudes than me. I don't get on with every black person. We have different views, opinions, cultures and values.

 

I'm attracted to black men, but I wouldn't date any black man. A person is more than their colour.

 

We are not all the same, because we have the same skin colour.

[kmack513]

Not in the part of UK where I live. It's very multicultural. Lots of WM/BW.

 

I have seen this on multiple message boards over the past 2 years.

[SwordofFlame]

No offense, but I just cannot relate to certain races. They also just make me angry with how they see/do things. I think that's one reason why I also am in FWB type things cuz, with me being so multi-whatever, it's hard for me to fit in with a white guy in the long run. I mean, I don't even like men from my own religious preference - regardless of their race.

 

I think I understand what you're saying. There are stereotypes and a lot of minorities here in the US tend to socialize and stay largely confined within their own native culture. There's nothing wrong with that per se, but these men/women often want someone who is also from that same culture. It makes sense because they'll have shared experiences and interests. This is also the reason that despite being an Asian-American male myself, I don't seem to have any luck with immigrant women from Asia. We grew up in seemingly two completely different worlds with different values, hobbies and interests.

[S_A]

I have noticed that White Men with Black Women is getting extremely popular (I've noticed that the black women in these relationships tend to be ridiculously hot, and I'm not even all that attracted to black women).

 

Also, Asian Men with White Women couples has increased exponentially IMO. This my not mean too much though because this pairing was always one of the more rarer ones to begin with, making it much easier for any increase to seem exponential. But I've seen a lot more of this over the past three years.

 

The most common interracial pairing though is White Men and Latinas. No other interracial pairing even sniffs that one in terms of frequency. I don't know what the numbers are, but it's nothing short of obvious.

 

One last thing I'd like to add is that a Western White Man with an East European White Woman is also very common. If not for skin color, this type of pairing is as interracial as it gets. Eastern and Western white people look extremely different from each other. They are nothing a like. Different builds, ways of thinking, attitudes, and even facial features. Aside from skin color, white people of the East and white people of the West have little in common. Skin color is a superficial commonality at best.

 

EDIT: For the non-white guys that complain about not being able to get white girls, there are so many white men dating and marrying outside of their culture, that there is no way white women would not increasingly pair up with non-white guys. I was at a Whole Foods a couple months ago and there was this white girl that looked completely infatuated with her Asian BF. I know it's anecdotal, but trust me, even the Asians guys are hooking up with white girls now (I only bring up Asians because they tend to have the biggest gripe about attracting white women).

Edited October 24, 2016 by S_A

[kmack513]

I have noticed that White Men with Black Women is getting extremely popular (I've noticed that the black women in these relationships tend to be ridiculously hot, and I'm not even all that attracted to black women).

 

Also, Asian Men with White Women couples has increased exponentially IMO. This my not mean too much though because this pairing was always one of the more rarer ones to begin with, making it much easier for any increase to seem exponential. But I've seen a lot more of this over the past three years.

 

The most common interracial pairing though is White Men and Latinas. No other interracial pairing even sniffs that one in terms of frequency. I don't know what the numbers are, but it's nothing short of obvious.

 

One last thing I'd like to add is that a Western White Man with an East European White Woman is also very common. If not for skin color, this type of pairing is as interracial as it gets. Eastern and Western white people look extremely different from each other. They are nothing a like. Different builds, ways of thinking, attitudes, and even facial features. Aside from skin color, white people of the East and white people of the West have little in common. Skin color is a superficial commonality at best.

 

EDIT: For the non-white guys that complain about not being able to get white girls, there are so many white men dating and marrying outside of their culture, that there is no way white women would not increasingly pair up with non-white guys. I was at a Whole Foods a couple months ago and there was this white girl that looked completely infatuated with her Asian BF. I know it's anecdotal, but trust me, even the Asians guys are hooking up with white girls now (I only bring up Asians because they tend to have the biggest gripe about attracting white women).

 

You are in LA? Cali has long been the swirl capital for WM/BW. Regarding WM/Latina women that is going to be a given considering Hispanic/Latina population of Cali. Some of those Latina women are pretty awesome.

[S_A]

You are in LA? Cali has long been the swirl capital for WM/BW. Regarding WM/Latina women that is going to be a given considering Hispanic/Latina population of Cali. Some of those Latina women are pretty awesome.

 

Did not know that about white men and black women. I don't doubt you either. And regarding White Men and Latina women, I know Cali has a high Latina population, but what I'm saying is that White Men with Latina Women is by far the most common interracial couple in the whole USA.

[DKT3]

I don't' understand this. There are so many people in different ethnicities that there is no "one" way they all act.

 

I have black friends, but they are very different. One is from Ethiopia, another born and raised upper class in the US. Neither is like the SNL skit you are referencing though the US born one would be more understanding of the cultural pieces than the non native.

 

My husband is hispanic, I am white. While our cultures add elements/spice to our background and history, they have little direct impact. My husband is far more "New York" than he is "Puerto Rican".

 

The human race is made up of a wide spectrum of individuals with their own thinking styles, backgrounds, ideas and desires. I find it to be lazy thinking to draw broad brushes based on color of skin or country of origin.

 

For myself, I have always been attracted to dark hair men than light haired. Outside of that, there was no cultural/physical requirements. What I have always looked for was a sharp wit, good sense of humor, driven, and caring individual which can be found in many cultures and countries.

Hispanic is not a race, so your husband is black, being that boricuas are mostly black.

[kmack513]

Did not know that about white men and black women. I don't doubt you either. And regarding White Men and Latina women, I know Cali has a high Latina population, but what I'm saying is that White Men with Latina Women is by far the most common interracial couple in the whole USA.

 

That would not surprise me at all. I miss Cali. Make it there ever year for a convention. Next time is Feb in LA, then Orange Co., Irvine the next year. We rotate it.

[DKT3]

Not in the part of UK where I live. It's very multicultural. Lots of WM/BW.

 

This is the culture part, when I go to the UK I see tons more wm/bf couplings. It's far more rare in the US, even more rare according to what part of the US. There are pockets in the black culture here in the US were it's simply not acceptable, not to those outside of the black themselves but within not from black men, but from other black women. It seems to be more common in the Northeast parts from Ohio to the Atlantic ocean, Virginia north.. that area seems to be the most accepting of interracial relationships in general

[kmack513]

Hispanic is not a race, so your husband is black, being that boricuas are mostly black.

??

 

the average Puerto Rican individual carries 12% Native American, 65% West Eurasian (Mediterranean, Northern European and/or Middle Eastern) and 20% Sub-Saharan African DNA.

Genographic Project DNA Results Reveal Details of Puerto Rican History ? National Geographic Society (blogs)