Mr_Sadz Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 I i went through a good break up with my girlfriend. Or as good as it can be when she doesn't have feelings for me anymore. It hurts. It hurst alot. The hardest part is that we both want and need to be friends. We both have important roles in a volunteer organization. We both want to continue to work there. But to do so we need to be able to be friends. Is there a way to make it easier? We just finished the last part of breaking up today, and i feel horrible. And now we texted as friends for the first time. Its so very hard. I dont know what to do. But i really need to make it work. Please help with any advice you have Thanks in advance David 1
Kelley Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 You can be civil to each other at work, keep it at work, there is no reason to contact each other outside work. You can be colleagues but I don't suggest you become friends. I think trying to be friends just keeps you stuck in the hurt. You need to heal, and to do that you need to try and move on. 2
ExpatInItaly Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 Be professional and polite when working together. But do not try to be friends. You will delay your healing and it will hurt like hell. Don't contact each other outside of work-related reasons. 2
Satu Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 (edited) It's very difficult to move directly from lovers to friends, and often impossible. I wish you good luck if it's what you want to do, but I don't think it's a good idea. To part now and parting now, Never to meet again; To have done for ever; I and thou, With joy, and so with pain. It is too hard, too hard to meet If we trust love no more; Those other meetings were too sweet That went before. And I would have, now love is over, An end to all, an end: I cannot, having been your lover, Stoop to become your friend. —ARTHUR SYMONS, “After Love.” Take care. Edited October 21, 2016 by Satu
Toodaloo Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 Don't try to be friends for a while. Just stick at being civil for the time being. You are both still processing your emotions which are very raw. You need to let that heal. How long it takes varies but you will know when you are there when the thought of her being with another man fills you with nothing but happiness for her joy... then you can be friends and not before. Do not try it too soon. Do not push it. Take it form someone who has been able to remain friends with some of her exes and who only see's them as friends. It takes a long time... 2
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