Author Jamesa1019 Posted October 21, 2016 Author Posted October 21, 2016 Sorry I can't figure out how to reply to a particular comment I forgot how to lol I do agree the hot and cold relationships are addicting. I was in an 8 year relationship from the time I was 20 to 28. Good times and bad times. Making up was awesome. The sleep overs were sleepovers because we literally spent the whole evening together and it was late by the time she had to leave, therefore she would just stay. They were also pretty much planned as she would bring a bag with her stuff. She has even left stuff here for future dates as I have at her place. We work different shifts so that's how it works when you have different hours. So to me that's a sign she's interested in staying every time and plans on continuing to see me. As for the back rub chatroom hero no it was not a I took off her shirt and played with her bra. I've been with many girls and know when a woman wants to take it to the next level. She's not that kinda girl dude. And sounds to me like you're an arrogant dude, /'d have zero respect for women. Just my opinion. I agree I do need to be more aggressive. Not by making physical moves but taking charge in decisions about what we are doing or what's going to happen with us. She asked what time to come over Saturday and I know she gets off work at two so I told her swing by right after you're ready after work. She agreed that's a good idea. We are going to my friends garage party that I informed her last week that it's old high school friends of mine I see about once a year. So she's not worried about us being together in front of my friends or family. And I'll say t again, she is absolutely over her ex. She's done everything to delete him from her life except get a restraining order on him. He physically abused her, is on drugs and she has been trapped with him similar to past relationships I've had. You eventually find comfort in being with someone and she couldn't be happier to get out there on her own and finally get to do things she couldn't do while with him. She's gone as far as to bring her dog over almost every time as I have a dog who is the same breed. She's let my mom take our dogs and has publicly thanked her for doing so in social media. All the signs are there she's comfortable with me and has even said so multiple times. I'm listening to all your opinions and truly believe she is just not ready to be in a labeled relationship for fear it could go south and it would damage her friendships with mutual friends, as that's all she has because her parents recently moved out of state and she's just starting off fresh with new people and a LIFE. I'm in no rush to get my validation of a commitment. I've had sever relationships similar and 100% of the time they just disappear after they get what they want. It starts with slowly weening off of texting and hanging out or flat out disappearing. She has every opportunity to turn me down on plans so I have to believe she is totally perusing something in the future. I've already made it clear if she doesn't want to see me that's fine and we can just both go our own ways no hard feelings. And I know she doesn't stick around because she can't meet others. She's very attractive and mature, a solid catch. So obviously while I admit I have laid out my feelings for her and expressed my interest a little too much and soon she's still here. And never once even in a joking manner has she said the word friend or brought up the thought it might not work. So I'll keep you posted for entertainment value on what happens tomorrow!
Sunkissedpatio Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 Well sounds like you are no longer confused and answered your own questions regarding where you stand with this girl. Have fun tomorrow.
ChatroomHero Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 As for the back rub chatroom hero no it was not a I took off her shirt and played with her bra. I've been with many girls and know when a woman wants to take it to the next level. She's not that kinda girl dude. And sounds to me like you're an arrogant dude, /'d have zero respect for women. Yeah, no. What I am saying is she is "not that kinda girl dude", with you. It has nothing to do with me and if I am arrogant or have no respect. Bottom line is some women like men, that act like, well men. You are acting like you have her figured out but by evidence of your post you don't. Everything you are doing and figured out isn't working if she said she thinks you are not interested. So maybe she is that kinda girl, you know? 1
LD1990 Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 You must not have read the whole post, they've kissed and had done so multiple times. I did read the whole post, including the part where his sister told him this girl is confused because he's not being aggressive enough. These kisses clearly haven't created any sexual attraction at all, which is why he needs to escalate things. thsnks for all of the replies. She's asking me what time to come over Saturday right now. So if she stays again, I'll be sure to grab her by the pussy and nail her to my headboard for all you ones that think she wants banged. I'll let you know how it goes ChatroomHero was spot-on with his advice. You act like this girl is some special little snowflake and you know her so well. Apparently you don't, because she rejected you and told your sister she doesn't know why you're so timid. But hey, if you want to be her pal, keep having sleepovers where you braid each other's hair and she sits there wondering when you're going to man up.
alphamale Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 So I've been super sweet and nice to her, ^^ here is your problem
LookAtThisPOst Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 Yeah, no. What I am saying is she is "not that kinda girl dude", with you. It has nothing to do with me and if I am arrogant or have no respect. Bottom line is some women like men, that act like, well men. You are acting like you have her figured out but by evidence of your post you don't. Everything you are doing and figured out isn't working if she said she thinks you are not interested. So maybe she is that kinda girl, you know? Keyword there is "some" women. This woman is not part of the "some", and with all this talk about picking up on "social cues", he's very good at picking up on this woman's not quite being ready to be sexed up. So there' no person on this message board, but the OP that had physical contact with this woman. I know of a woman that complained about a guy that tried to feel up her up during a movie at her place. She wasn't ready to go there just yet, but he kept pawing at her, he was like, "I cannot lay in bed with a woman without thinking it's a green light to have sex with her." The guy was in the same situation as this woman above, but chose the sexually aggressive route. They wound up in an argument and he never called her again. That's what he got for not respecting her boundaries. Sure they were in bed together, but...she wasn't ready...he didn't respect that and gave her the ol' heave ho. Some women don't operate like the OP's girlfriend.
Toodaloo Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 thsnks for all of the replies. She's asking me what time to come over Saturday right now. So if she stays again, I'll be sure to grab her by the pussy and nail her to my headboard for all you ones that think she wants banged. I'll let you know how it goes James... This is NOT a good idea... Indifference however... She is obviously a girl who wants that something extra... "Grabbing her by the pussy" is really not the way to go about it. Back off and get her chasing you is. Don't initiate any texts or conversations. Let her put the effort in. No more super nice. To be perfectly blunt though I think the best thing you can do is blow her off and go and meet someone else that you can be super sweet to and who will be super sweet back to you... This girl isn't all that into you and playing games just gets tedious and tiresome.
kmack513 Posted October 21, 2016 Posted October 21, 2016 James, any reason you didn't try to have sex with her considering you have slept in the same bed? And you gave her a gift? Why, she isnt you GF.
Author Jamesa1019 Posted October 22, 2016 Author Posted October 22, 2016 Keyword there is "some" women. This woman is not part of the "some", and with all this talk about picking up on "social cues", he's very good at picking up on this woman's not quite being ready to be sexed up. So there' no person on this message board, but the OP that had physical contact with this woman. I know of a woman that complained about a guy that tried to feel up her up during a movie at her place. She wasn't ready to go there just yet, but he kept pawing at her, he was like, "I cannot lay in bed with a woman without thinking it's a green light to have sex with her." The guy was in the same situation as this woman above, but chose the sexually aggressive route. They wound up in an argument and he never called her again. That's what he got for not respecting her boundaries. Sure they were in bed together, but...she wasn't ready...he didn't respect that and gave her the ol' heave ho. Some women don't operate like the OP's girlfriend. Thanks for being the one person who understands my laying in bed situation lol for one I'm not gay. Two even tho I don't know how women think or what it means when they say things I do know when a girl is ready to go "there". Just cause we make out and sleep in the same bed doesn't mean she's not interested or I'm not. There's always a little more contact than a kiss, such as an arm around you, a leg across your body, or simply put intense passionate kissing. All of which besides some simple kissing is all. And yeah, now someone can say "that's obvious she isn't in to you". Yet this has occurred at least 7 times over the last 3 weeks... Things take time. I have time. And don't get me wrong, something else comes along I'm gone haha! I just truly believe she needs more time, honestly looking back I did try, really try to progress this
Author Jamesa1019 Posted October 22, 2016 Author Posted October 22, 2016 James, any reason you didn't try to have sex with her considering you have slept in the same bed? And you gave her a gift? Why, she isnt you GF. I didn't get the vibe she was ready to go there ya know? I guess it was a gift in fact, but not like a real gift i.e. Birthday, present, or any special occasion thing. It was a small bag with some thoughtful things in it that we have either done together or seen. I thought "hey, if I get her something thoughtful and explain my feelings about our relationship written down (because I'm not the greatest person discussing feelings) she would think I'm a good dude and not someone out to just have sex or hurt her". She liked it obviously, I just didn't get the desired response from it. And at least I did something to get an idea of how she feels because I'm telling ya trying to understand women is impossible
2011 Posted October 23, 2016 Posted October 23, 2016 Sounds like you are pushing things too much and trying to lock her down. If you're going out with her and kissing etc. why have you to ask her to be your girlfriend, is that not already obvious? Let her bring up the we are official now line not you. Just continue to court her and enjoy your times together.
smackie9 Posted October 25, 2016 Posted October 25, 2016 Tip: never sleep in their bed unless sex on the table..if not you go the f^&% home. Ever hear what a cuddle b itch is? look it up. If she wasn't going to sleep with you, then you should have backed off and kept your dignity. Don't be some sucky shelp getting all puppy eyed....women find that such a turn off.
Recommended Posts