rsap Posted October 14, 2016 Posted October 14, 2016 Hi all! I'm hoping I can gain perspective here from you all. I've been married for 3 months now and been in a loving relationship with my hubby for six years and we have never had any major issues. Recently during a conversation I came to find out some information regarding my husbands past that has changed things for me - now just to make you aware I do suffer from OCD and tend to let my mind run away with things so bare that in mind. Basically my husband has a niece who is just over 2 years younger than him but 3 years in school. When he was in secondary school they hung about all the time and he was always at her house. He's always had a group of friends that were girls all around this age - also he was very shy and quite inexperienced as far as it goes. So when he was 15/16 he was hanging around his nieces house and was introduced to one of her friends who was 12/13/14 roughly. Don't know exact age because we don't know her birthday. So anyway - the girl was quite loud and confident and my hubby quite shy - he wasn't attracted to her but she was attracted to him and somewhere along the line they snogged eachother. A couple weeks later she went to call for him after school and went with his niece to his house and they went to our Nieces house and they snogged again and they talked over 'msn' flirted a little and then he saw her one more time and snogged her again. Other than that nothing occurred and after a few weeks of a couple songs and flirting it just stopped (he wasnt interested in taking it any further and didn't really pursue her and she just got bored I guess). This all might sound innocent but I can't let it go. I was mortified when I found out their age gap so 2/3 years. I could not get my head around a 15 year old wanting to snog a 12/13 year old girl, it's at the point now I literally cannot look at him I feel sick. We talked about it and he says looking back it was weird and she was a bit too young but he didn't think that at the time cause he was quite inexperienced for his age and hung about mostly with younger people anyway. I'm so hung up on it - he says he never fancied her or anything and didn't pursue it he was just sort of happy that a girl had taken an interest in him because it didn't happen often and he was really shy. I don't know what to think - my mind is torturing me over it and making me think he's perverted - he's never given me a reason to think this. I just want to know what your opinion is on the matter? I'm struggling with it and it's coming between us. I just hate the fact she was that young and he snogged her more than once. Help me!!!
JewelD Posted October 14, 2016 Posted October 14, 2016 This is an issue with yourself and your insecurities. There's nothing perverted about a 2-3 year age gap when they were both underage. Maybe a little odd for a highschooler to be kissing a girl in grade/middle school, but it doesn't sound like something to be getting hung up over now. Nor does it make him a pervert. 3
l8estnews Posted October 14, 2016 Posted October 14, 2016 If you've read my posts, I am very sensitive about cheating, infidelity and the likes, but girl, your issue is NOT an issue at all. Don't ruin a really good marriage for something that your husband did during his teenage years. 2
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