petroff Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 (edited) Okay, so here's a story. My ex gf broke up with me a week ago. Now she's apparently showing to everybody how happy she is, she is partying, drinking, etc. Whatever. 7 months ago she broke up with her ex and the same day we actually become a couple. She was really cute during all the time being my girlfriend but I was too, I really felt being loved and cared for. She broke up a week ago, because my approach became wrong..I was making fights about minor things, was trying to restrict her from doing some stuf.. well I regret this, I see my mistakes now. That's not a point. Few days ago she wrote to her ex! Can you imagine? 7 months ago she was with that guy(her boyfriend for 2 years) at a party and when she got drunk she started to cuttle me, hug, touch me everywhere and he was sitting in front of her, but he was too drunk to even notice. They broke up week later because she was attracted to me..And now she's talking to him again! That guy was in real pain when she left him, because she left him for me(I didn't know the whole story back then, so it wasn't much of a problem for me, I thought he was abusive to her). He was calling her "b*tch" after she broke up, because he was really hurt because of what she had done, and saying that trusting her was a mistake. He didn't even try to get back with her because he was fed up and hurt. She asked him to meet, and apparently he agreed! I was really surprised when I heard this from our mutual friend. She left me and 1 week later she's trying to get back with that guy. I don't know who she is anymore..Who I was dating and loved. What do you think the guy will do or what he should do? She actually cheated on him in some way..What would you do if you were this guy? Edited October 12, 2016 by petroff
Toodaloo Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 Never mind what he is doing. What you are doing should matter more. The girl is rebounding left right and centre. Thats all this is, its all you are and the ex and the next guy... You are all rebounds. You need to take time and heal. Never mind what they are doing concentrate on you and your healing. 3
Author petroff Posted October 12, 2016 Author Posted October 12, 2016 I was actually asking about what would you do if you were that ex boyfriend? But thanks for calling me a rebound anyway.
Blanco Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 But thanks for calling me a rebound anyway. The truth, while not always pleasant, doesn't lie. 2
Author petroff Posted October 12, 2016 Author Posted October 12, 2016 Im asking what would if a cheating ex gf would try to get back with you.
Blanco Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 Im asking what would if a cheating ex gf would try to get back with you. Who cares, especially if you aren't the guy? If she's a cheater, you don't need her in your life and are better of without her. From what you posted, it's clear she can't handle being single, and so she's always going to fill a void with someone. Your turn just happens to be over. 2
ackuric Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 Why does it matter to you what the ex that was cheated on thinks? Its irrelevant and analyzing it is not healthy whatsoever. Kind of worries me you even have those thoughts... Get out of his head and into yours, focus on you. GL 1
l8estnews Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 My ex gf broke up with me a week ago. Now she's apparently showing to everybody how happy she is, she is partying, drinking, etc. Whatever. This shows how mature and a "catch" your GF don't you think? 7 months ago she broke up with her ex and the same day we actually become a couple. She's definitely a branch-swinger. Why did you let yourself become an obvious rebound?! She was really cute during all the time being my girlfriend but I was too, I really felt being loved and cared for. She broke up a week ago, because my approach became wrong..I was making fights about minor things, was trying to restrict her from doing some stuf.. well I regret this, I see my mistakes now. That's not a point. Sounds like both of you aren't matured enough to handle a proper relationship. Few days ago she wrote to her ex! Can you imagine? 7 months ago she was with that guy(her boyfriend for 2 years) at a party and when she got drunk she started to cuttle me, hug, touch me everywhere and he was sitting in front of her, but he was too drunk to even notice. They broke up week later because she was attracted to me..And now she's talking to him again! Okay, I have read the rest, but obviously both of you sounds like youngsters who are really into that teenage love and its accompanying petty drama. This girl sounds like an immature kid who seems to have no idea what she's doing. She's basically just playing. You, on the other hand, is expecting a serious relationship from this girl after knowing for a fact that she is the kind of girl who cuddles with other guys in front of her boyfriend. Since it was YOU whom she cuddles, you ignored this serious red flag of a behavior. My Advice: You seem to be a teenager, so focus on your studies first, try to gain maturity, and find a respectable girl.
DeepVibeZ Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 It's a learning experience, my friend. NEVER get seriously involved with anyone who's just ended a LTR. You're a rebounder, end of, and most are doomed from the start. She used you due to her own pathetic insecurities. You're well rid.
Author petroff Posted October 12, 2016 Author Posted October 12, 2016 I'm 21 years old. And I am mature but probably was too naive.
aloneinaz Posted October 12, 2016 Posted October 12, 2016 I don't know who she is anymore..Who I was dating and loved. How do you say that you don't even know who she is anymore? You knew who she was from the day you started dating. She dumped her 2 year BF and in a matter of days was in your bed. Why are you surprised that she's now trying to jump back in his bed? What do you think the guy will do or what he should do? She actually cheated on him in some way..What would you do if you were this guy? If he had half a brain, he'd have some nice revenge sex with her and then kick her butt to the curb. My man, you've dodged a bullet here. She's really shown her character from day one with you. If you made mistakes with her, then learn from them and don't do them with the next GF. 1
Author petroff Posted October 13, 2016 Author Posted October 13, 2016 I understand. Well, the worst things are memories.. I hope they will fade out soon. This was a really painful lesson for me but I need to learn for it and avoid this kind of sh*t in the future. I hope that that guy is smart enough not to let her back in his life.
Toodaloo Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 I'm 21 years old. And I am mature but probably was too naive. You can still be naive many years on (trust me I know). What does it matter what the guy is thinking. He was probably hooked and thinking "yay I got her back" and has no clue that pretty soon he is going to be ditched for the next guy again... Do not fret about it. Just let them get on with it and you go do your thing and get yourself sorted out. I hope YOU are smart enough not to let her back into YOUR life... The memories stick around but the pain fades. Give it time and while time is doing its work look after you... Take steps to distract yourself, take steps to do things that make you feel good about yourself, take steps to move on.
basil67 Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 Sounds like she's still the same as when you met her. Perhaps you were in love with the person you imagined her to be?
RyanO1991 Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 (edited) I'm going to be brutally honest - you didn't have any problem about her dumping her bf and getting with you straight away. But when it's you on the receiving end, it suddenly becomes an issue. You've learnt a painful but important lesson. Edited October 13, 2016 by RyanO1991
Author petroff Posted October 13, 2016 Author Posted October 13, 2016 I don't think I am the one who is jumping from one girlfriend to other, but her jumping from one guy to another, and then back to the previous. They broke up, he didn't even try to get back with her because he was hurt after she sort of cheated on him. I wanted to be with her, so I didn't see any problem. It's obvious that now I'm in a bad condition, right after a break-up, and this is an issue for me.
RyanO1991 Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 (edited) If she was willing to hurt someone on a whim once, then she's more than certainly happy to do it again. Unfortunately, love isn't a fairytale like some people expect. Relationships need work and sacrifice. Lasting love takes a long time to nurture. If you want a long term partner, keep that in mind. At least this happened while you're still young and have lots of time to meet other people. Edited October 13, 2016 by RyanO1991
Author petroff Posted October 13, 2016 Author Posted October 13, 2016 Well, you're right. Of course, I feel devastated and can't believe it has happened, but on the other hand, what if it happened after 2 or 5 years or what If we were married..This would be even worse. Yes, I'm still young, and I will probably date other people, but things like this aren't really easy for me to handle. And yeah, at some point she wouldn't even fight for the relationship, sacrifice anything, so in the long term it's probably good that we're not together anymore. This is what my brain says, my heart says the opposite but hopefully this will change in time.
RyanO1991 Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 Well, you're right. Of course, I feel devastated and can't believe it has happened, but on the other hand, what if it happened after 2 or 5 years or what If we were married..This would be even worse. Yes, I'm still young, and I will probably date other people, but things like this aren't really easy for me to handle. And yeah, at some point she wouldn't even fight for the relationship, sacrifice anything, so in the long term it's probably good that we're not together anymore. This is what my brain says, my heart says the opposite but hopefully this will change in time. Personally, I think you've got a great attitude here. You've had a lucky escape. Doesn't make it hurt any less, but it's better than being stuck with Little Miss Nutcase for the best days of your life. You'll be out there enjoying life with someone worthwhile while she's bouncing between men like a ball on a tennis court. 2
Author petroff Posted October 13, 2016 Author Posted October 13, 2016 Thank you for your words. That's what I needed.
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