If she's easy, she won't be amazing....

October 12, 2016

I met this girl on a dating site. We small talked, then she tells me how handsome I am, & wants really want's to go on a date. I'm thinking to myself, "wow, this is going to be too easy." We exchange numbers.

I added her on Instagram, and there's a lot of guys in her comments telling how beautiful she is. I mean A LOT. She doesn't respond but I really hate this. I know she's not my girlfriend yet, but I already have trust issues with her.

I told her I let her know when I'm free to go out. I'm kinda on the fence about this. I'm afraid she's one of those easy girls who hops from guy to guy. Looks too that she got out of a relationship. I hope I'm not a revenge rebound. So, should I just go out with her & see what happens?

October 12, 2016

How is giving a guy a compliment same as being easy? She sounds outgoing and cool. There is no way to judge her character without spending time with her first and as long as you are careful you should be ok.

I met this girl on a dating site. We small talked, then she tells me how handsome I am, & wants really want's to go on a date. I'm thinking to myself, "wow, this is going to be too easy." We exchange numbers.

I added her on Instagram, and there's a lot of guys in her comments telling how beautiful she is. I mean A LOT. She doesn't respond but I really hate this. I know she's not my girlfriend yet, but I already have trust issues with her.

I told her I let her know when I'm free to go out. I'm kinda on the fence about this. I'm afraid she's one of those easy girls who hops from guy to guy. Looks too that she got out of a relationship. I hope I'm not a revenge rebound. So, should I just go out with her & see what happens?

October 12, 2016

How is giving a guy a compliment same as being easy? She sounds outgoing and cool. There is no way to judge her character without spending time with her first and as long as you are careful you should be ok.

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

October 12, 2016

I'm afraid she's one of those easy girls who hops from guy to guy. Looks too that she got out of a relationship. I hope I'm not a revenge rebound. So, should I just go out with her & see what happens?

No. You should judge her on the basis of her saying yes to you and the msgs from randoms on her instragram account.

October 12, 2016

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

That's the girl you wanna eventually take to mom & dad for Sunday dinner? Nah. I don't think so.

October 12, 2016

You seem pretty invested for someone who thinks that this girl is "easy." Don't get me started on the title of this thread because there are so many things wrong with it.

Anyway, back to the point. Yeah maybe she has some sketchy content on her instagram, but are you really going to judge someone based solely on their online presence? Give the girl a chance, or don't. Either way you sound pretty unfairly judgmental towards this girl who you haven't even met in person. Giving you a compliment is not something to be concerned about and that doesn't make her easy.

October 12, 2016

TLDR: Move on, not worth it.

I met this girl on a dating site. We small talked, then she tells me how handsome I am, & wants really want's to go on a date.

Meh, small talk wasn't that great, she didn't compliment you on the small talk/your game. She reached for something physical to compliment you on/move with instead. Not an instant out for me, but that'd definitely be strike 1.

I'm thinking to myself, "wow, this is going to be too easy." We exchange numbers.

Easy? Easy to get a number, probably. Easy to get physical with? Maybe. Easy to have a longer-term relationship with? I've seen nothing that points to it being easy.

I added her on Instagram, and there's a lot of guys in her comments telling how beautiful she is. I mean A LOT. She doesn't respond but I really hate this. I know she's not my girlfriend yet, but I already have trust issues with her.

This screams a ton that you might want to rethink some things:

1.) This girl has given you a number, not a promise of a date, not a relationship, not a kiss, not slept with you. A phone number, phone numbers are effortless to give out. I can give you a phone number right now on my burner account and have it gone in 5 minutes from now, for free. Even if its my real number, if I decide I don't like you, with Google, you can be instant blocked/told the number isn't in service within the hour; I don't even get your texts/calls. I'm not exposed. I know married girls or girls who are dating other guys who can, will, and do give out their phone numbers to guys they find attractive, even if they have no intentions of starting a relationship with them immediately. It's a way to put you on the options list.

2.) That being said, you say you know she's not your girlfriend, but you're having trust issues with her, and hate the fact that guys look at her? What attracted you to her? Her looks? The fact you thought she was beautiful? Isn't that a double standard? If she's something to look at, and hot, get used to it. I've dated some girls, that I know are hot, and I know if I take them out; other guys are going to look, and will even hit on her, I'm fine with that, I'm confident enough that she's out with me, and jealousy never looks good. She's not responding to these guys...she hasn't even committed to a date with you yet, and she's not responding to them, taking issue with this will spell trouble for you long term. Trust is a cornerstone of a relationship, without trust, you're not going anywhere. I'd say if this bothers you, it'd be an instant out for me, and if I was her, it'd be an instant out for me too if I knew you had trust issues with guys that are looking at her, that she's not responding to.

I told her I let her know when I'm free to go out.

In the future, don't, when you find out when you're free, and already have something in mind, just invite her next time. I find conversations are always a lot more awkward when you're like, well, sometime, we might be able to do this, and when I'm free, I'll let you know. It sends mixed messages, it displays a lack of confidence in your own schedule/time management, its just bad. It's a lot easier to say hey, are you free tonight? I was going to go catch some wings at xyz bar and watch the game, want to join me? Or hey, did you hear abc comedian is in town this week at the comedy club, I watched this gig of his on youtube and he's so funny, I'm going to pick up a ticket do you want to come? etc. It's a lot more confident, straight forward, no guessing, and it gets you an instant answer and you both can move on with your life after you get that answer.

I'm kinda on the fence about this. I'm afraid she's one of those easy girls who hops from guy to guy.

How does someone look like they just hop from guy to guy? I see later you explain that, but this kind of explains your thought process. She doesn't look like it, you have suspicions, you have doubts, you have trust issues, lack of confidence, lack of trust, it'll kill you, move on.

Looks too that she got out of a relationship. I hope I'm not a revenge rebound. So, should I just go out with her & see what happens?

I'm guessing you just seen this from her profile? I generally like to avoid people I don't really know yet who just got out of a relationship. The rule of thumb I use is they should have been out of the relationship for half the time they were in it, before I'll give them a shot, up to a year. Been in a relationship a year? I want them single 6 months, been in a relationship 4 months? I want them single for 2 months, been in a relationship 5 years? a year cool-off should be fine.

I generally modify/slip this rule up a bit, if I know her well enough, but even then, I usually just half the above time; but it sounds like you don't know her well, or how long she's been out of a relationship, so I would say no.

Here's a problem with that, on a dating profile, most girls I know who are "over" their exes, aren't going to mention they just got out of a relationship on a profile. Even on a date, for the first 4 to 5 dates, mention of exes, for both girls and guys, should be restricted to yes I am single/divorced, no I'm married/in an open relationship/recently separated; how long its been since the relationship, and whether or not they have kids (or other things, pets, still work with them, etc.). Anything beyond that, generally means they're not over them, and still thinking about them, and you'll either be an emotional outlet, or you'll be finding yourself in a much worst situation. Either way, I'd consider that an instant out.

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

Did you check dates/times? If you're going to hit someones instagram and browse heavily, before even having a date, and read everyone elses comments to them and check out all their pictures; check that out too. If its from a year, two years, 5 years ago, does it matter? People change, if its yesterday, and she's been single for 6 months, does it matter? If its yesterday and she's been single for 2 weeks, or is actively dating 5 guys? Run. I don't know man, I'd move on.

October 12, 2016

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

I know you're caught up with her looks, but think with your brain.

October 12, 2016

I know you're caught up with her looks, but think with your brain.

It's been said that men are the only warm-blooded creatures with two heads, but usually only one works at a time . . .

October 12, 2016

That could also just be her sense of humor. If it bothers you then don't date her, but I wouldn't judge her as 'easy' just because of some nonsense she posts on social media.

October 12, 2016

Go out with her anyway...what of it, have fun. Is it not an ego boost to be in the company of a beautiful woman? It brings up your value when other women see you with her. It can play in your favor and attract those other ladies.

October 12, 2016

Her getting attention from guys all the time is just something you have to deal with and accept, if you want to date a pretty girl.

I think that happens to all attractive women on social media.

Just go, you have nothing to lose.

October 12, 2016

First of all, her online persona may not match how she is in person. She may be great - and if she isn't, you'll know once you've met her in person.

Second, she may be great and fully able to commit to one person - but you won't know if you don't meet her. Besides, if you only date the women who appear to match your ideas of what's appropriate online, they may turn out to be so sexually repressed that you'll eventually regret any relationship that develops!

October 12, 2016

Easy? Easy to get a number, probably. Easy to get physical with? Maybe. Easy to have a longer-term relationship with? I've seen nothing that points to it being easy.

This screams a ton that you might want to rethink some things:

1.) This girl has given you a number, not a promise of a date, not a relationship, not a kiss, not slept with you. A phone number, phone numbers are effortless to give out. I can give you a phone number right now on my burner account and have it gone in 5 minutes from now, for free. Even if its my real number, if I decide I don't like you, with Google, you can be instant blocked/told the number isn't in service within the hour; I don't even get your texts/calls. I'm not exposed. I know married girls or girls who are dating other guys who can, will, and do give out their phone numbers to guys they find attractive, even if they have no intentions of starting a relationship with them immediately. It's a way to put you on the options list.

2.) That being said, you say you know she's not your girlfriend, but you're having trust issues with her, and hate the fact that guys look at her? What attracted you to her? Her looks? The fact you thought she was beautiful? Isn't that a double standard? If she's something to look at, and hot, get used to it. I've dated some girls, that I know are hot, and I know if I take them out; other guys are going to look, and will even hit on her, I'm fine with that, I'm confident enough that she's out with me, and jealousy never looks good. She's not responding to these guys...she hasn't even committed to a date with you yet, and she's not responding to them, taking issue with this will spell trouble for you long term. Trust is a cornerstone of a relationship, without trust, you're not going anywhere. I'd say if this bothers you, it'd be an instant out for me, and if I was her, it'd be an instant out for me too if I knew you had trust issues with guys that are looking at her, that she's not responding to.

I don't agree with this entire comment but I do agree with this piece. You come off as either expecting a virginal woman (who will probably when be complaining about lack of sex) or very insecure.

As for the crude humor you really don't know until you talk to her a bit more. I have historically only been with men I've been in relationships with, waited a long time, etc. But I absolutely love crude humor. You really don't know if that's her sense of humor or her mindset and values until you spend a little time getting to know her.

October 12, 2016

Maybe I am insecure. One of my exes had guys commenting on her pics all the time. I did my detective work & found out she was sleeping with them. It was easy getting into a relationship with her too. What also bothers me is that she likes all these guys photos.

I've been with several girls like this. People always say I attract that certain type.

But I do like this girl. My goal is to have a relationship. I'm just jumping to conclusions because of my past.

October 12, 2016

Maybe I am insecure. One of my exes had guys commenting on her pics all the time. I did my detective work & found out she was sleeping with them. It was easy getting into a relationship with her too. What also bothers me is that she likes all these guys photos.

I've been with several girls like this. People always say I attract that certain type.

But I do like this girl. My goal is to have a relationship. I'm just jumping to conclusions because of my past.

so find a girl you can trust, that doesn't give you doubts/insecurities, not being able to trust a girl, its not worth it. just move on, you'll be happier, and avoid being in this situation again in 2 months, 3 months, 8 months, however long what you're pursuing now lasts.

October 12, 2016

This is why I find dating so hard as a woman. I mean I can't act too interested or he thinks I'm desperate. I can't play games and do hard-to-get (not in my nature). If I mention how long I've been single for and maybe what my number is then he will make some kind of value judgement based on that. I just think it's not good to discuss these things until there's enough time that you get a truer sense of the real person.

As smackie said, what harm can a date do? She's close to your area and you seem to have your wits about you in case it's not legit so you could just go along and just see if you get on or not.

October 12, 2016

If she's easy, she won't be amazing....

Sayings like this are so self-fulfilling and rather ambiguous...any saying is true....and false.

Darned if it is, darned if it isn't...

Just go on a date.

I also questioned a number of things about a woman...I went out with her and it worked out....until it didn't and finally discovered why the things I questioned in the first place were... Ha ha! :-P

Go on a date and find out for yourself.

October 13, 2016

"needing a new d*ck every now a then."

At least she's honest. Hahaha she sounds funny.

'If she's "easy" she won't be amazing' is a fallacy!

Edited October 13, 2016 by Cookiesandough

October 13, 2016

You should leave this girl alone.

If you want a relationship, don't choose a girl that you have negative opinions of.

If you can't handle other men being interested in her or that she may have an active sex life, leave her alone. Don't burden her with your insecurities.

October 13, 2016

Maybe I am insecure. One of my exes had guys commenting on her pics all the time. I did my detective work & found out she was sleeping with them. It was easy getting into a relationship with her too. What also bothers me is that she likes all these guys photos.

I've been with several girls like this. People always say I attract that certain type.

But I do like this girl. My goal is to have a relationship. I'm just jumping to conclusions because of my past.

I guess it comes down to whether you will be more mad at a missed opportunity or mad you didn't listen to your first instinct and avoid the situation if it turns out like you think it will?

People will do what they will. You can only be responsible for your decisions and actions

Edited October 13, 2016 by HillValley

October 13, 2016

Maybe I am insecure. One of my exes had guys commenting on her pics all the time. I did my detective work & found out she was sleeping with them. It was easy getting into a relationship with her too. What also bothers me is that she likes all these guys photos.

I've been with several girls like this. People always say I attract that certain type.

But I do like this girl. My goal is to have a relationship. I'm just jumping to conclusions because of my past.

This sounds like a you issue, not a her issue.

October 13, 2016

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

At best she is totally crass. At worst she meant what she posted.

I'd move on if what you want is someone for something potentially serious.

October 13, 2016

I mean, she posted meme on her IG about "needing a new d*ck every now a then." -___-

There's a lot of post of that nature on her page.

If I saw that on someone's Instagram I'd pass too. Why would she post something like that. Is it to work up the dudes who are following and complimenting her already?

Women pass up on guys all the time when they see something about us that indicates we don't share their values. (And as they should.) Well, don't feel bad about doing likewise. Especially if you have dated your share and know what personality type does not work for you--that does NOT make you "insecure", it makes you SMART.

Edited October 13, 2016 by Imajerk17

October 13, 2016

I met this girl on a dating site. We small talked, then she tells me how handsome I am, & wants really want's to go on a date. I'm thinking to myself, "wow, this is going to be too easy." We exchange numbers.

I added her on Instagram, and there's a lot of guys in her comments telling how beautiful she is. I mean A LOT. She doesn't respond but I really hate this. I know she's not my girlfriend yet, but I already have trust issues with her.

I told her I let her know when I'm free to go out. I'm kinda on the fence about this. I'm afraid she's one of those easy girls who hops from guy to guy. Looks too that she got out of a relationship. I hope I'm not a revenge rebound. So, should I just go out with her & see what happens?

Wow... you are making so much of so little... you have already judged and condemned this girl before even meeting her... well your lost... someone less judgmental will be the winner!

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If she's easy, she won't be amazing....

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