damianed Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 (edited) This is a strange issue and I have no idea where to post this thread so I'll just post here. My girlfriend gets uncontrollably excited and happy to the point her body can't seem to take it. We've been dating for a few months. It's hard to explain directly in a single sentence so I'll just write some things that happened. We started off as friends for the first few months we met. Fell for each other over time. We clicked so well and it was like laughter was our language. Then I asked her on a date and that's when it started. As we were getting more romantically involved, she began to have a hard time sleeping for the next few nights. She would wake up repeatedly throughout the night to her heart pounding and racing with the happy feelings she gets with me. I slept over for a few nights to help her sleep and then made a relaxing music playlist for sleep to help her. It helped alot, it still happens sometimes though. We have alot of touching moments and it triggers the heart pounding most of the time. I started to get concerned after the other night where we had a very touching moment that made us both cry and she got so shaky with the heart pounding that her legs got weak and she threw up. That's some of the things that happened... she's normally a very calm person, very quiet and usually has a easy time controlling herself. When we fight her body doesn't get like this which is odd. But I still definitely know this is anxiety related, possibly an excitement anxiety? It's strange, she's had long term relationships before and she says she has never got like this in any situation before. She told me that I just make her so incredibly happy and grateful-- prior to our relationship, she struggled from the community of the small town she grew up in, they were bullying and bashing on her all throughout her highschool and college years for getting raped by her ex boyfriend. (Ex never went to jail, he's a popular guy, well known by everyone from her town), parents were unsupportive, and she fell into another abusive relationship with another guy she met in the middle of that struggling time. She went through all of this in a total of 7-8 years. For the first month of our relationship she was anxious to trust me. So I always wanted to make her laugh alot, and I did. I want to think that the break downs, puking, and sleep issue is anxiety related but it's just so different because it's happening when she's happy with me. Hurting her is far from what I want to do for her... I love her so much and I don't know what to do about this in the time being. She's seeing her doctor about this soon. Has anyone here ever experienced something like this? Edited October 10, 2016 by damianed
ExpatInItaly Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 I don't think this is all down to being happy or excited. It could instead be related to some some fear in her, given that her other relationships ended badly and she is afraid this one could, too. So when she experiences a loving or happy moment, it perhaps also acts as a trigger for her anxiety. However, I am not a doctor and that is really the one person who could identify what is happening with her. It's an odd problem, indeed. Hopefully she gets some answers soon. 1
Gaeta Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 She should see her doctor, any type of stress to the heart isn't good and should be checked. You associate this to anxiety but it could be an actual physical problem with her heart or blood pressure. 1
Redhead14 Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 This is a strange issue and I have no idea where to post this thread so I'll just post here. My girlfriend gets uncontrollably excited and happy to the point her body can't seem to take it. We've been dating for a few months. It's hard to explain directly in a single sentence so I'll just write some things that happened. We started off as friends for the first few months we met. Fell for each other over time. We clicked so well and it was like laughter was our language. Then I asked her on a date and that's when it started. As we were getting more romantically involved, she began to have a hard time sleeping for the next few nights. She would wake up repeatedly throughout the night to her heart pounding and racing with the happy feelings she gets with me. I slept over for a few nights to help her sleep and then made a relaxing music playlist for sleep to help her. It helped alot, it still happens sometimes though. We have alot of touching moments and it triggers the heart pounding most of the time. I started to get concerned after the other night where we had a very touching moment that made us both cry and she got so shaky with the heart pounding that her legs got weak and she threw up. That's some of the things that happened... she's normally a very calm person, very quiet and usually has a easy time controlling herself. When we fight her body doesn't get like this which is odd. But I still definitely know this is anxiety related, possibly an excitement anxiety? It's strange, she's had long term relationships before and she says she has never got like this in any situation before. She told me that I just make her so incredibly happy and grateful-- prior to our relationship, she struggled from the community of the small town she grew up in, they were bullying and bashing on her all throughout her highschool and college years for getting raped by her ex boyfriend. (Ex never went to jail, he's a popular guy, well known by everyone from her town), parents were unsupportive, and she fell into another abusive relationship with another guy she met in the middle of that struggling time. She went through all of this in a total of 7-8 years. For the first month of our relationship she was anxious to trust me. So I always wanted to make her laugh alot, and I did. I want to think that the break downs, puking, and sleep issue is anxiety related but it's just so different because it's happening when she's happy with me. Hurting her is far from what I want to do for her... I love her so much and I don't know what to do about this in the time being. She's seeing her doctor about this soon. Has anyone here ever experienced something like this? She is lying to you about what's going on with her. She is not overly excited or happy, I'd say she is being "triggered" by being with a man and possibly suffering from PTSD. She's been raped and abused chronically. She is seeking male attention and doing things that she might not really want to do but does it because that's what she thinks is expected of her. For the first month of our relationship she was anxious to trust me As we were getting more romantically involved, she began to have a hard time sleeping for the next few nights. -- She is being triggered. She needs a complete physical and a therapist. 3
ChickiePops Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 She is lying to you about what's going on with her. She is not overly excited or happy, I'd say she is being "triggered" by being with a man and possibly suffering from PTSD. She's been raped and abused chronically. She is seeking male attention and doing things that she might not really want to do but does it because that's what she thinks is expected of her. For the first month of our relationship she was anxious to trust me As we were getting more romantically involved, she began to have a hard time sleeping for the next few nights. -- She is being triggered. She needs a complete physical and a therapist. My thoughts exactly. It's not excitement, it's PTSD. 1
elaine567 Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 Yes, I think anxiety, potential heart problems and PTSD are valid suggestions. Has she ever been in therapy for the rape/abuse/bullying? My feeling that PTSD triggering does fit, as redhead suggested, but Hypo-mania may be a possibility - Hypomania and mania | Mind, the mental health charity - help for mental health problems. or thyrotoxicosis Overactive thyroid (hyperthyroidism) - Symptoms - NHS Choices Is she experiencing any of other symptoms detailed? Whatever it is, she is definitely doing the right thing by consulting a doctor about it. He will be able to exclude any medical reasons for her symptoms and point her in the direction of good psychological/psychiatric help if that is what is required. 1
Lansing Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 Personally I would try not to overthink this yourself or try to "fix" it. Sure, give her every opportunity to open up to you and talk to you. Make her feel comfortable that she can bring issues to you and discuss them. However, on the medical side, I would say seeing a doctor (and even if the first doctor doesn't have an answer seeing other doctors) is essential. If you go off of advice that you might come across on the internet you might worry too much or overthink things yourself. People have mentioned possibilities on here already and they seem like a possibility. A short story from my dating experiences.... I was dating a girl once and I found out weeks after on our second date she didn't want to have a coffee because she had felt "sick to her stomach". We talked about it more and turns out she felt really anxious about the date because she really liked me. It seemed unusual to me but later in our relationship other things had come up where she felt really anxious and part of the reason we broke up was that she just seemed very anxious about the relationship as a whole and felt like I wasn't re-assuring her enough. So from my personal experiences (I have some issues with anxiety too) I do think this type of reaction can be from anxiety but there could be a lot more going on too.
smackie9 Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 This is definitely a psychological/medical issue that needs to be addressed by a professional. Gaeta is right. If this condition isn't diagnosed and taken care of, her health and possibly her life is in jeopardy. This is pretty serious and shouldn't be taken lightly. 3
Dis Posted October 10, 2016 Posted October 10, 2016 It sounds like there are both psychological and physiological health concerns here Her doctor should do a full physical assessment including an EKG, blood work, (TSH, ACTH, CBC) As for the vomiting, her doctor should order an MRI to rule out any abnormalities of the brain (Sometimes spontanous vomiting can be caused by tumors on specific lobes of the brain, more specifically the brain stem) Although there may be some physiological issues I'm inclined to believe her symptoms are arising from specific psychological conditions such as anxiety, posssibly mania, ptsd etc (As mentioned by others) Let your gf know loud and clear that you are open to talking about her emotions and that she need not hide things from you....which I'm sure she is considering her lengthy history of abuse I do think you need to keep in mind that dating may not be the best thing for her right now. She might need to recieve medical treatment and begin to heal before she can function healthfully in a relationship Best of luck to you and your gf
preraph Posted October 11, 2016 Posted October 11, 2016 She needs to get diagnosed by a psychiatrist or psychologist, I think, but start with a medical doctor to rule anything out. But to me, she sounds like she possibly could be bipolar. They have highs and lows to varying degrees all over the spectrum. When manic, they are very active and not sleeping usually and can be creative if they have any creativity in them, and are very up and happy. Then they can crash real hard and be depressed and tired and in a bad mood. Glad she's seeing the doctor, because something is up. Sounds manic, but could be something else causing the mania I guess. I once had it as a backlash when I finally got over a major depression and sometimes if I just hear something I like it can derail me for a couple of excited days. The last time it was from hearing an old Alice Cooper song when I was traveling and I "fell in love" with him for about 72 hours. Mind you I've been a fan my whole life and even met him a couple of times, but I hadn't fallen in love. It was so crazy. I was just on this high and that's what triggered it. It's okay, Alice, I'm safe to be around again now, so don't be afraid to come to Dallas. I'm on a cane, so I'm sure you could outrun me anyway.
jstar845 Posted October 13, 2016 Posted October 13, 2016 I’m glad you reached out for support on this situation. I’m glad that your girlfriend has someone like you in her life to support her. I don’t think this situation is odd; however, I have heard of individuals who have experienced similar situations. It does sound like anxiety as anxiety could do this to a person. Additionally, she seems happy with you which is a great thing. I also believe she desires to make you happy and you may be seeing a reaction from this as well. It’s good that she is seeing her doctor about this soon he/she will give her the best advice on how to handle this situation. I believe you are doing a great job with supporting her. Best Wishes!
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