CryForNoOne Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 My ex and I broke up in April and she's been a royal b!tch to me for the past 6 months. I won't get into the details but her behavior has been completely uncalled for. We need to maintain contact because we have a 2 year old daughter. She hooked up new guy immediately and they moved in together in July. They broke up about 2 weeks ago and low and behold, she is suddenly wanting to be back in my life in a major way. I still love her but have decided to make a clean break. I'm driving up to see my daughter this weekend and she is suddenly talking about doing things together as a trio. I'm 100% certain if I entertain her advances we're going to end up sleeping together this weekend. Do I reject her advances? It always ends badly but a part of me is always holding out hope because we have a daughter together and I want it to work out for her...
Arieswoman Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 CFNO, You can have a relationship with your daughter without having a sexual relationship with your ex. You need to set some boundaries with regard to co-parenting because your child needs a stable environment. Do I reject her advances? Yes. You make it clear that you're there as a parent and for no other reason. Don't allow her to suck you back into a drama that will be confusing and disorientating for your child.
smudge21 Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 You really think she truly wants you back in a loving long-lasting relationship way... or would you say this is more her looking for that short term ego boost, especially since following another break-up. Once she has what she wants, you'll be dumped again. Maybe, maybe not, but you know there's problems between you two and if you choose to ignore them then this will never work out. You can just have a relationship with your child and not your ex, but it does take you both acting like adults and not jumping into bed together because you feel you can't help yourself. If any relationship is to be rekindled, then you need to fix the problems that caused it to break first. 2
Gr8fuln2020 Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 ...I still love her but have decided to make a clean break. You still love her after the way she has treated you??? You love her so much that you would like to get back together and work it out? So, you were the one who got dumped for another guy? Of course, we don't know all of the story, but she left you and 'treated' you poorly until now. And you still love her SO much that you want to get back together? ...Do I reject her advances? It always ends badly but a part of me is always holding out hope because we have a daughter together and I want it to work out for her... Getting back together b/c of children is a poor reason considering you don't and didn't have a positive relationship in the first place. Your child is better off seeing two, separate parents behaving like adults and as positive role models than you two together fighting or doing whatever dysfunctional thing you've done. It sounds to me like you've already decided what you are going to do. No? 1
Toodaloo Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 You go and see your daughter and you do not do anything as a trio. You do know she is using you as an easy rebound to get over her fling don't you? Just keep it simple, keep clear boundaries in place and move on. If you get back together with her you will end up in a whole new s*** storm of messy emotions and broken hearts. Keep it civil for your daughter but go no further. 2
kendahke Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 I'm 100% certain if I entertain her advances we're going to end up sleeping together this weekend. Why? Because it's been a minute since you last had sex? You have no discipline? Do I reject her advances? It always ends badly but a part of me is always holding out hope because we have a daughter together and I want it to work out for her... question for you: what happens if you don't reject her rebound advances and you fall into bed with her and possibly create a second child? What happens after the fever breaks and you're laying in bed next to her looking at her after the deed is done? How will you feel about yourself for letting yourself be played out like that? 1
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