Balista Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 I just broke up with my girlfriend. But I still love her. And it hurts. I love her and she loves me, but things haven't been good for a while now, and I realize a lot of it is because i have some deep emotional issues that were preventing me from being the person she needed and deserved. She is a really mature person, and she knew what was hapenning, and she understood why. This is what pains me. I want to be with her, i want to make her happy and be happy with her. But I can't, not how I am now, so i had to let her go. And even though I'm therapy to figure my ****, I know that we will probably never be together again. And it hurts. It hurts more than I can bear right now. It hurts to know that I broke the heart of the person I care most in the world
DarrenB Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 Hey, don't be too hard on yourself. Problems arise from time to time, especially within ourselves, and especially when we find romance. Emotional issues are incredibly hard for ourselves to keep at bay, and even harder for our other half to constantly cater to, or just to simply empathize how we are. Unfortunately, alot of the time, we are given up on. We tend to blame the OP, but we are unable to make them stay through whatever it is that is drawing them away from us. It doesn't sound like this is the case here, but you've done a good job in not allowing it to aggravate the situation further and ending it on a somewhat considerably good note. It's good that you understand, the process of overcoming what you're facing in this predicament is to acknowledge the negatives and understand the route of the issues. Coming to the realizations of the worst outcome is typical, but is also a good thing to notice... just so it doesn't get your hopes up entirely. As it goes for reconciling (if you even wish or tend to), or to simply better yourself from the situation for future reference, just take some time. Honestly, time to do anything. Sleep, reflect, grieve, dwell, be active and w/e else you could possibly think of. Time is one of your main friends after losing someone you love. The whole process especially the aftermath of losing someone you love, is very hurtful... can be for quite some time. It can either be a very temporary or longterm process - there's no in between. But, the fact of the matter is, is that you will overcome it. Of course you will. Once you've noticed your mistakes, it'll make it alot easier for you to apply this in future reference and to avoid the same things happening continuously. What you mustn't do though, is compare how things would have been if 'you did things differently'. The more you dwell about things like this, the harder it will be to let go; ultimately will also be harder for you to move on (you may probably already know that). What you do from now, is for you, and only you. Not anyone else, especially not her. She is no longer present in your life... for now anyway. Proving to yourself, that change within yourself can happen is the main thing you have to do. Dealing with emotional issues, emotional stress, mental stress and so forth is proceeded solely by you and your actions. Once you're able to identify this and 'change', you will feel much better than you do now. I'm sure you'll be able to do it with some time and thought. As it goes for losing someone you love and having to let someone go, yes it's hard and yes it is awful knowing that you might not ever get the chance to be with them again. Unfortunately, coming to these epiphanies fundamentally is better than getting your hopes up and assuming that once you've changed you'll be able to rekindle what you had with the OP. You might get the chance, you might not. But it's not worth thinking about in the meantime. You're simply just going to have to like you say 'let her go', even if it's temporary or worst comes to worst indefinitely. Don't destroy yourself over something that was inevitable, especially at the time. With change comes improvement. With improvement comes self-preservation and with self-preservation comes immense amounts of self-worth and self-esteem. Better yourself and give yourself opportunities for the future. 2
loney_girl Posted October 5, 2016 Posted October 5, 2016 Why do you think you can't be together in the future? Do you think you could work it out after you figure out your issues?
loney_girl Posted November 29, 2016 Posted November 29, 2016 Hi Balista, if you are still with us, I was just wondering how you are making out and if things have gotten any easier for you?
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