Cocoaflavareena Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 I want to take the time out to write this, and as I'm writing this so many bottled up emotions A LOT OF PAIN. I been through a lot in my life , my own father didn't love mw and was never apart of my life, having gone through a lot of things I rather keep to myself that resulted in having a big void in my life. I was 18 years old when I met the first guy I fell in love with on a block. ( at the time i was dumb and naive) he was 4 years older than me. Long story short... Hw was the most romantic guy, at the time cause no guy ever took the time out to REALLY get to know me. OF couRSE he got comfortable by now IM DEEEPLY in love and this was something big for me cause I never opened up emotionally to any guy let alone fall in love. He seen a young female and I believe he took advantage He started making me feel low i should of looked at the signs he had a baby mother he still was, doing god knows what had another chick who was always making it seem like they was communicating. But anywho , one day my mom kicked me out and I moved in with him everything changed I thought it would be perfect. Wrong !!!! He started acting very distant complaining about how I cleaned mind u I was trying to do everything right its like after that he completely changed. He would add a lottttt of females on facebook to the point it made me insecure and i would tell him. He would brush it off like "Its only facebook". And go on chicks page liking ton of there pics like trying to get there attention. I never did this. If any guy would try to talk to me I would let them know im taken and send pics of me and him to the ones who ignored the fact I was taken and repeatedly flirting. He was a club person EVERY week he would go out at the ttime I was to young he would pressure me to have threesomes s finally did. Thinking he would see I love him , he got comfortable and would say so many disrespectful things he was very good at verbally abusing me. Called me a lot of bitches , he left me one time for hes baby mama they already had a convo about getting back together. He DID SO MANY things took a female out to thw bar once. AND HOME. And i still loved him. Itwas like a drug. Now to this day Im trying to move on called it quits because one night he got drunk i was at one of my close friends get together & he started accusing me of being a hoe. He went to her house trying to find me by than I was home sleep and my phone was dead , basically she told me he was inappropriate calling her thick , touchung her feet. & etc that CRUSHED ME. than couple days ago I was listening to my voicemail he forgot he pocket dialed me and was talking to hes friend saying thags why its good to **** have sex with a female whos taken. And talking about hes sexual encounter so right there i knew he been cheating on me. He would say "whata the point in cheating when we **** bitches together " but yall im so damaged. Nobody knows the half i blame myself for putting up with this i feel so damaged abd hurt. He sell drugs and has money but never spoiled me he would take trips and buy expensive chains has a camaro everyone knew who we was together , but im wortg more he really messed me trauma and damaged ms so bad. He calls me fat a lot recently, Im no where near fat but he says hes just playing very nasty guy. I know another pretty female going to jump on him. I really need help to get over him. Im checking hes facebook on this fake page I made. Im jus THINKING of him and he doesn't even deserve to be thought of.
JewelD Posted October 3, 2016 Posted October 3, 2016 I've been there. You have to cut him out of your life entirely or you'll never be able to get over him. I don't know if you guys are still living together but he seems like the type of guy to drag women down just because he can. And if you have a baby with him it will be even harder to let him go. You should try no contact. No calls no texts and block him on everything. It's really the only way to wean yourself off a toxic relationship. But once you get through the hard part, you'll look back and see how destructive he really was to your life and youll question why you ever put up with it. And there is no reason to be worried about him getting with some other woman. You already know he isn't **** so you know any woman who dates him is going to encounter the exact same treatment that you did. Maybe even worse. 1
Author Cocoaflavareena Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 Been two days and he's calling and texting. But Im so over this relationship by now, even if he meets a female and treat her good ill atleast know i really did anything and everything, under the sun for this man. He is a **** hole i even went to jail for domestic violence, after finding out he was being inappropriate with my friend. It hurts cause he aint **** from wanting space, and breaks clear to see i was a doormat hes controlling about what i wear calls me hoe. I need to walk away for GOOD cant be weak i still check hes fb and i hate that
Author Cocoaflavareena Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 I've been there. You have to cut him out of your life entirely or you'll never be able to get over him. I don't know if you guys are still living together but he seems like the type of guy to drag women down just because he can. And if you have a baby with him it will be even harder to let him go. You should try no contact. No calls no texts and block him on everything. It's really the only way to wean yourself off a toxic relationship. But once you get through the hard part, you'll look back and see how destructive he really was to your life and youll question why you ever put up with it. And there is no reason to be worried about him getting with some other woman. You already know he isn't **** so you know any woman who dates him is going to encounter the exact same treatment that you did. Maybe even worse. And on top of it he gives bad head and hes sex gets whack.
Author Cocoaflavareena Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 After 3 LONG YEARS of calling my friends hysterically crying of agony and pain from a guy I GAVE , GAVE and gave until I lost myself. Finally done... After hearing a voicemail of someone I love talking about screwing women, and being inappropriate with my close close friend, from me going to jail cause of that I am done. No more crying No more being called names No more feeling down No more going above n beyond No more fake moaning lol Wash my hands. Being with this man made my connection with my family stop ,and become like strangers this was a very bad toxic relationship with a guy who treated me like ****. SAD PART still love him. ..NOT IN LOVE still check hes Facebook and wonder what or whos he is talking, to even tho during our relationship by hearing the pocket dial voicemail he left at the time , hes been cheating. Hes been calling n texting i blocked him but how can I remain strong? I even pray for god to remove any feelings I have for him away..
Author Cocoaflavareena Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 Even tho my ex really treated me horrible, still have love for him. How do I stop myself from checking hes Facebook or thinking about him a lot any tips.?
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