RyanO1991 Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 My ex and I broke up in August after she said she'd met someone else and don't trust me to open up to her. After a messy and emotionally charged couple of weeks, she said she saw a difference in me and was confused. She said she needed time to decide what she was going to. She said she'd get in touch when she was ready but didn't want me to contact her. But she wanted to let me know a meet up with a new female friend went - I bluntly refused. Just to clarify, I have no intention of getting back with her. I deserve better and it turns out my family and friends never even liked her. But I accidentally saw her in a picture on Facebook recently and she looked upset and lost. I'm wondering whether I should get in touch and tell her bluntly that I don't want her in my life or maintain the NC and just not respond when she tries to contact me - show her that she has no power over me and I really don't care. 1
Frozensushi Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 show her that she has no power over me and I really don't care. This is the best thing you could ever do for yourself. 3
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 2, 2016 Author Posted October 2, 2016 This is the best thing you could ever do for yourself. Thank you! 1
aloneinaz Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 I'd move on with your life and to a better GF. "IF" she reached out in the future because she's so awesome to "consider" dating you again (how nice of her), I'd give her a big fat dose of IGNORE.. F-her and ignoring her sends a signal that she's a not even worth replying too. 4
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 2, 2016 Author Posted October 2, 2016 I'd move on with your life and to a better GF. "IF" she reached out in the future because she's so awesome to "consider" dating you again (how nice of her), I'd give her a big fat dose of IGNORE.. F-her and ignoring her sends a signal that she's a not even worth replying too. Thank you for this. I appreciate it. 1
smudge21 Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 How lovingly respectful of her to "let you know" and expect you to just hang around whilst she lives her life. Wow, where did you find such an angel. I bet she's the type who along with the moody Facebook pictures, also posts quotes regarding loyality and respect in relationships and how nasty some people can be... clearly ignoring the fact that's exactly what she does. In case you can't tell, I'm in the "walk away" camp on this one. You can and should do better. Find someone who respects you as much as you respect her. Ignore social media as that's only postcards of someone's life and nothing to do with you. She made this choice and now you go live your life instead of waiting around for her. If she ever does get back in touch, then ignore. If you find you can't do that (I hope you can) then simply reply with something about respecting your self. Onwards and upwards. 3
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 2, 2016 Author Posted October 2, 2016 Thanks, Smudge. I appreciate it. I'm not friends with her on Facebook and haven't even bothered to see what she's up to. Just mutual friends who have taken pictures and she happens to be in them. Her new guy is very controlling and sounds quite neurotic, so I can take satisfaction in being the best person in all this. I'm definitely not going to contact her.
aloneinaz Posted October 2, 2016 Posted October 2, 2016 Thanks, Smudge. I appreciate it. I'm not friends with her on Facebook and haven't even bothered to see what she's up to. Just mutual friends who have taken pictures and she happens to be in them. Her new guy is very controlling and sounds quite neurotic, so I can take satisfaction in being the best person in all this. I'm definitely not going to contact her. They sound perfect together! Even better for her is to NEVER hear from you again.. 1
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 2, 2016 Author Posted October 2, 2016 They sound perfect together! Even better for her is to NEVER hear from you again.. LOL. This put a smile on my face. Thanks for the support.
fromheart Posted October 3, 2016 Posted October 3, 2016 My ex and I broke up in August after she said she'd met someone else and don't trust me to open up to her. After a messy and emotionally charged couple of weeks, she said she saw a difference in me and was confused. She said she needed time to decide what she was going to. She said she'd get in touch when she was ready but didn't want me to contact her. But she wanted to let me know a meet up with a new female friend went - I bluntly refused. Just to clarify, I have no intention of getting back with her. I deserve better and it turns out my family and friends never even liked her. But I accidentally saw her in a picture on Facebook recently and she looked upset and lost. I'm wondering whether I should get in touch and tell her bluntly that I don't want her in my life or maintain the NC and just not respond when she tries to contact me - show her that she has no power over me and I really don't care. You're dong the right thing, and are getting your power back. Only thing I'd say is, if there is a similar situation in future go total NC as soon as she meets someone else. Really bad of her to be telling you how 'confused,' she is when she's already done the deed. Not worth the time of day... 1
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 You're dong the right thing, and are getting your power back. Only thing I'd say is, if there is a similar situation in future go total NC as soon as she meets someone else. Really bad of her to be telling you how 'confused,' she is when she's already done the deed. Not worth the time of day... Thank you for this. I appreciate the support. 1
Marc878 Posted October 3, 2016 Posted October 3, 2016 IMO I'd block her on everything. Going dark in these situations speaks louder than anything you could say 1
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 IMO I'd block her on everything. Going dark in these situations speaks louder than anything you could say Thanks, Marc. I appreciate the advice. I haven't blocked her but I'll be ignoring any contact she tries to make. Just curious to see if she actually has any courage to actually get in contact, which I doubt. Whatever happens, she's out of my life.
aloneinaz Posted October 3, 2016 Posted October 3, 2016 Thanks, Marc. I appreciate the advice. I haven't blocked her but I'll be ignoring any contact she tries to make. Just curious to see if she actually has any courage to actually get in contact, which I doubt. Whatever happens, she's out of my life. But you should block her because you don't care if she does or doesn't reach out. That's the point. It really screws people up when the small percentage of people do contact an ex and they are not over it yet. Why risk that. 1
Author RyanO1991 Posted October 3, 2016 Author Posted October 3, 2016 But you should block her because you don't care if she does or doesn't reach out. That's the point. It really screws people up when the small percentage of people do contact an ex and they are not over it yet. Why risk that. Good point. I know I won't contact her, even if she tries to contact me. But blocking might be the best bet. Thanks.
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