katheryn Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 i have read lots of the topics about no contact, but in my case I'm hoping to show that as i am still in house we shared and he is in neighbors/ex best friends literally next door, got to go past the fromt of my house to get to hers , I'm just acting very normal getting on with things telling him what kids up to and sorting things out like money for kids, post, and being just like i don't care but like everybody else i have hope as her relationships don't go anywhere, especially as i suspect that she used certain things about us both to get under his skin and to get him away from me if only i had seen this before he left i might have been able to save marriage in first place, she showed true colors wed afternoon as she new he had been talking to me on phone when he got 3 warnings from work if he wanted to hang up he would of he's done it before, like i said she was apparantly abit pissed of by the time she came home from work and tried to take it out on me,saying i was pushing him to her i told her she was welcome to him, then told him that i didn't want her to contact me again as i haven't done anything to her (felt like it but what would that achieve) since then we have had at least a conversation each day no arguing and very civil, the other thing i have tried not to do is tell him it wont work with her,her past record but he knows this and if i tell him this he would try to make it work, i think he was afraid of being on his own as i have told him that i don't want him back and have filed for divorce after just 6 wks but his reasons for leaving were all lies and only thinking about him self. i know i wasn't perfect but who is i hope he can manage to find himself before its to late
Zaira Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 This must be so awkward I am assuming it is the marital home? Are you looking at a divorce and/or property settlement? If so, I would try and get it done asap, so you can move away, and not have to face this cr@p.
Author katheryn Posted July 8, 2005 Author Posted July 8, 2005 cant sell marital home as we havent paid enougth of the morgage to be able to find some where else and she has morgage for property as well only one consolation all other males were on good money exh isnt and has to pay me money for kids and pay towards bills
Zaira Posted July 8, 2005 Posted July 8, 2005 You are in a really awful situation. I can only suggest that you do your best to avoid them, and find some time to enjoy yourself.
Author katheryn Posted July 8, 2005 Author Posted July 8, 2005 tomorrow Saturday im throwing a bbq/party for my friends so I'm moving on I'm not ready to go out looking for a new fella as this has left me in a state of wat the hell was all that effort for in the last 16yrs, he is talking to me quite civil evenn if it is just for the kids and one day maybe he can regard me as a friend but never will i trust her again what are friends for to worm there way into a friends relationship and then move in on there husband when he walks out that ain't my idea of a friend, my worst time is in the middle of the night when i wake up and cant get them out of my mind it is very annoying when i do this and i don't want to doctor wont give me any sleeping pills as I'm on anti depressants, i even work some nights and then i stay up next day until i have to go to bed and even this don't work hopefully i will stop this with time,
Author katheryn Posted July 10, 2005 Author Posted July 10, 2005 the bbq went wellwe stayed out untill after midnight but when i went to bed the night again was not very good i woke by 4 and couldnt get back to sleep untill 6.30 they kept invading my thoughts and i even cried a couple of time and when i got up i felt so low it was tearing me up, tried to explain to exh how my 21 yr old does not understand wat she sees because of her disabilities he said he could not support me on trying to keep her from comming in to see her (the new gf) because she is obsessed with her so i asked for backing on there actions while my daughter is there dont know if that will work they think im unreasonble but they decided to have a relationship next door
Zaira Posted July 10, 2005 Posted July 10, 2005 ~huge hug~ I really feel for you. I can't even imagine what you are going through knowing that they are so close. I think another trip back to the doctors might help though, and I think counselling would be very beneficial.
Author katheryn Posted July 10, 2005 Author Posted July 10, 2005 waiting for a appointment to counselling and already taking antidepresents, waiting at mo for them to bring back our kids and then it will be tougth because the kids will play me up and i have to be strong for them, they are due back in a hour and half
Author katheryn Posted July 12, 2005 Author Posted July 12, 2005 i managed to get an appointment today for councilling hope it will help, also took daughter for check up have to wait and see if he is interested to results i have decided he can find out for himself , he also got to let me know were he wants to meet the kids tomorrow im not asking him , yesterday i went into garden to pick washing in and they were sitting outside not even a hello he even gave a dirty look to my older daughter and her friend, on sunday he shouted at me that he still wants joint custody so did what solicitor said and told him to go for it hope he knows wat it involves, solictor cant see judge letting our 2 kids live there as there aint no room, he looked shocked at my response , as far as i know he hasnt even seen a solictor yet for advice his loss, going to try and do no contact but it going to be hard as he sees the kids, and got to walk past me sometimes to get to her house, sorry to sound like im moaning but needed to say these things
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