GemmaUK Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 I have to add also that clinginess is far far different from closeness and lovingness. Way different! If anyone here has experienced both - those are the ones who know. I love closeness and lovingness but I don't want a ball and chain around my foot! 1
pteromom Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 I am a very independent person. I need space. So clinginess is NOT for me. But I have no issue with 2 people who enjoy it enjoying it together. As long as both are happy, and aren't clinging out of insecurity or fear, but a healthy desire to just be near each other. 3
eightytwenty Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 I dated a guy that would send a "I love you" 4-5 times a day. he texted me every morning, good morning, even though I would call on the way to work. If I was going out, he would blow up the phone. I broke it off in a couple weeks. He was a great sweet guy, but I rather of pulled all my hair out then to deal with that. That being said, I'm independent, I like being the person that calls, but I also don't call unless I need or ask a opinion on something. My boyfriend isn't much of a talker, and as independent as I am but he'll call on his way home from work and sometimes at lunch. It's not a habit and we talk when we get home. When we dated we texted a few times a day, talked on the way to work and home, then called for a goodnight. Saw each other every other weekend. 1
Daisy-oliviaWentcher Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 It would be great if clingy people fell for each other. I've noticed clingy people seem to fall for free and independent people and then the problems start. Hahahaha yes! And the more clingy behaviour a person displays, the more independence and distance the other creates and then to compensate for the distance, the clingy person gets, even more, clingier! I've noticed that too! 2
Gaeta Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 So you won't even date someone and evaluate to what extent you can handle it or to the extend he's taking it? You may date him, then realize, "Oh, he's not THAT clingy after all." Right, you would need to find out by perception what "clingy" is to him and to you. Very good points, there's also the excitement of the new relationship where he was "acting out" in a fashion that may have appeared clingy, when it isn't his nature at all. In fact, it'll eventually reach a level or plateau. We will go around and around on this because your definition of cligny is probably not the same as my definition. Let me tell you about the last cligny man I met. After a first coffee together he started texting me several times a day, among those text there was 10s of those virtual picture of roses with little birds flying over, unicorn, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs about why I was the most beautiful human being walking the face of this earth. I kept an open mind and went on a second date. Second date he had brought me not 1 gift but 3 gifts. He was sitting next to me at the restaurant and wouldn't let go of my hand so I had to eat my meal with 1 hand free. After date 2 add even more little pictures of roses with birds flying over, unicorns, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs on how we are meant to be together and he wants me to meet his mom and daughter. You get the picture? Even then I did not shut him down. Nope, I had an honest conversation with him and told him he was a nice man I'd like to see more but he'd have to tone it down. He was suffocating me with his 100s text a day, his daily calls and him showering me with long conversation about how amazing I am. He said ok, he understand. It lasted 24 hours and he was back with his little pictures of roses with birds flying over with unicorns and angels. That's my definition of cligny. He did not let me breath. He did not let me wonder about him. He was in my face all the time! He killed it. What else was I suppose to do? Don't you think I gave him as shot? 1
preraph Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 I only attracted one clingy guy. He would follow me from room to room at my own house, like he was a piece of toilet paper stuck to my shoe. It was ridiculous. He was a nice guy. We started off too fast, my fault. But the last straw was when I would tell him I was just going to the restroom (this is a small house, mind you) so that he wouldn't follow me -- and he still followed me in there. Ridiculous!!! Thank heavens there were no smartphones back then.
LookAtThisPOst Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 We will go around and around on this because your definition of cligny is probably not the same as my definition. Let me tell you about the last cligny man I met. After a first coffee together he started texting me several times a day, among those text there was 10s of those virtual picture of roses with little birds flying over, unicorn, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs about why I was the most beautiful human being walking the face of this earth. I kept an open mind and went on a second date. Second date he had brought me not 1 gift but 3 gifts. He was sitting next to me at the restaurant and wouldn't let go of my hand so I had to eat my meal with 1 hand free. After date 2 add even more little pictures of roses with birds flying over, unicorns, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs on how we are meant to be together and he wants me to meet his mom and daughter. You get the picture? Even then I did not shut him down. Nope, I had an honest conversation with him and told him he was a nice man I'd like to see more but he'd have to tone it down. He was suffocating me with his 100s text a day, his daily calls and him showering me with long conversation about how amazing I am. He said ok, he understand. It lasted 24 hours and he was back with his little pictures of roses with birds flying over with unicorns and angels. That's my definition of cligny. He did not let me breath. He did not let me wonder about him. He was in my face all the time! He killed it. What else was I suppose to do? Don't you think I gave him as shot? Holding your hand the entire time you ate? Yeah...that IS clingy.
Author DrReplyInRhymes Posted September 30, 2016 Author Posted September 30, 2016 We will go around and around on this because your definition of cligny is probably not the same as my definition. Let me tell you about the last cligny man I met. After a first coffee together he started texting me several times a day, among those text there was 10s of those virtual picture of roses with little birds flying over, unicorn, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs about why I was the most beautiful human being walking the face of this earth. I kept an open mind and went on a second date. Second date he had brought me not 1 gift but 3 gifts. He was sitting next to me at the restaurant and wouldn't let go of my hand so I had to eat my meal with 1 hand free. After date 2 add even more little pictures of roses with birds flying over, unicorns, pictures of angels and at bottom long paragraphs on how we are meant to be together and he wants me to meet his mom and daughter. You get the picture? Even then I did not shut him down. Nope, I had an honest conversation with him and told him he was a nice man I'd like to see more but he'd have to tone it down. He was suffocating me with his 100s text a day, his daily calls and him showering me with long conversation about how amazing I am. He said ok, he understand. It lasted 24 hours and he was back with his little pictures of roses with birds flying over with unicorns and angels. That's my definition of cligny. He did not let me breath. He did not let me wonder about him. He was in my face all the time! He killed it. What else was I suppose to do? Don't you think I gave him as shot? Alright..I'll admit, as much as I like to judge people, even that is a bit much... Here, I thought 20 texts (realistically) a day was being clingy and out of touch!
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