Ex is in a rebound relationship but keeps texting and calling...

[matty2049]

So my ex and I were in a 2.5 year relationship which had its ups and downs..

 

Recently I found out she s been in a relationship since the end of August but invited me over twice since it started (i had no idea she was even in one until a friend told me last week, social media was all blocked so no way to tell). She said she was going to commit to me but when I called her out on it she backed off. I had sex with her on the 5th of this month and then went over to comfort her a week later because she misses home and family. We moved out west together last year for a job I received.

 

I left her alone and told her not to message me again when I found out. Well I know I did it to myself because I still love her even though I shouldnt, but I was responding to texts. She told me she still loves me and has second thoughts constantly and regrets not telling me the truth. She called me 2 nights ago at 3 am saying he left her to walk home alone (45 minute walk) and that she was done with him and told me I would never let her do that and that I was the man she knew she wanted.

 

We ended the call because she had to work 5 hours later .. The next day she messaged me and said she was sorry and that she was drunk and didn't remember much of what she said... Then I asked if she spoke with him and she said yes and that it was a big misunderstanding, to which I replied "goodbye Danielle"

 

She messaged again last night saying "I think I'm just going to leave this place and not say anything to anyone".. Even though she said it to me lol but whatever... I didn't respond and don't plan to. My thing is that I love this girl to bits and I wish she would just come to her senses. I have heard things about this guy and he's nothing but trouble .. I found out he was trying to text a girl at 4 am a week ago and I told her that. She said it was done, then the next day it's not.

 

What's her deal. If I just go straight no contact do you think this girl Wil begin chasing me to the point where she needs me back or should I just move on with life because of it?

 

She's hot and cold AF....I'm keeping level headed and not chasing or begging her at all. Any thoughts on this behaviour and what it really means?

 

She also knows I plan on moving home at the end of October because there is nothing keeping me here anymore, and all my friends here fear she's just going to basically follow me home once I'm gone. Its very possible she's the type to do it and is almost obsessed with me...

[aloneinaz]

My friend, the question you should be asking yourself is "what's my deal". Ask yourself why you're allowing her to use you as a doormat or second choice at her convenience? Clearly she knows she has you wrapped around her little finger. She texts, calls and you're always available to her.

 

She sounds like a drama queen who's LOVING the attention she's getting from both her new BF and her ex BF. The problem, is you're allowing her to have it both ways.

 

She's clearly not that into you or she'd of stayed with you in the first place. But, she went out and found some new guy to play with.

 

You're allowing her ALL THE POWER between you. She's not respecting you what so ever as it's all about HER needs. Why allow that?

 

If you want to stop this childish, selfish drama from her, you need to stop having ANY contact with her. Start worrying about you and YOUR needs. Ignore her. Block her number or change yours and keep her blocked on social media.

 

Then, find someone new who wants you as her number one priority.

[NopeNah]

Man....read my history here. It's very messy,by the way.

[Ady1974]

My friend, the question you should be asking yourself is "what's my deal". Ask yourself why you're allowing her to use you as a doormat or second choice at her convenience? Clearly she knows she has you wrapped around her little finger. She texts, calls and you're always available to her.

 

She sounds like a drama queen who's LOVING the attention she's getting from both her new BF and her ex BF. The problem, is you're allowing her to have it both ways.

 

She's clearly not that into you or she'd of stayed with you in the first place. But, she went out and found some new guy to play with.

 

You're allowing her ALL THE POWER between you. She's not respecting you what so ever as it's all about HER needs. Why allow that?

 

If you want to stop this childish, selfish drama from her, you need to stop having ANY contact with her. Start worrying about you and YOUR needs. Ignore her. Block her number or change yours and keep her blocked on social media.

 

Then, find someone new who wants you as her number one priority.

 

This.

 

It is time to be selfish for you and make you happy. Move on bud, as hard as it may be. You have to do it for your own happiness and sanity.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

My friend, the question you should be asking yourself is "what's my deal". Ask yourself why you're allowing her to use you as a doormat or second choice at her convenience? Clearly she knows she has you wrapped around her little finger. She texts, calls and you're always available to her.

 

She sounds like a drama queen who's LOVING the attention she's getting from both her new BF and her ex BF. The problem, is you're allowing her to have it both ways.

 

She's clearly not that into you or she'd of stayed with you in the first place. But, she went out and found some new guy to play with.

 

You're allowing her ALL THE POWER between you. She's not respecting you what so ever as it's all about HER needs. Why allow that?

 

If you want to stop this childish, selfish drama from her, you need to stop having ANY contact with her. Start worrying about you and YOUR needs. Ignore her. Block her number or change yours and keep her blocked on social media.

 

Then, find someone new who wants you as her number one priority.

 

This is a great response, I'd say many of the same things here,

No point in beating the dead horse, you're being played I fear!

Cut her loose, let her have her ex...they deserve one another,

Find a different girl who will love you and not **** another!

[Toodaloo]

Matty - your ex is a cheater and a drama queen.

 

Move on. There is no fun in this at all.

 

Start ignoring her texts and phone calls. She will probably try and pull the "you don't care about me so you must be so mean" card.

 

Ignore it all.

[fromheart]

What this means is that she is very imbalanced and not relationship material. It means you walk away, and do not have her involved in your life.

 

She can't contribute towards your happiness, as she herself is not happy.

 

By walking away you are loving yourself first, and also showing her that you care. She was feeding and clothing herself long before you came along, she will be fine. Who she now chooses to date is irrelevant to your life, as she is no longer with you.

[Asterix]

Don't take this the wrong way but I think you are chasing and begging. I mean, why are you investigating the communication of het bf and telling her the outcome? It's like that kid telling the teacher you cheated on your exams.

 

Your words don't match your actions. If you say goodbye to her stick to it and don't communicate with her a few days later. She's got you exactly where she wants you, around her little finger.

 

The sobering fact is that she doesn't want you. She has feelings for you but she doesn't want you.

 

Remove yourself from the back-up plan seat, move on and go no contact. It is defenitily easer said than done but it is the only way out.