Parrotlet Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 My boyfriend has a mild cold. He is acting like he is on death's door. I was sympathetic, but, in my opinion, he has veered into crazy town. Last night, my boyfriend mentioned that he had a tickly throat and a stuffy nose. He felt well enough to go to the gym and get drinks with a friend. However, when I saw him later he was DYING. He was moaning, appeared to have trouble breathing, was rolling around in bed and generally acting as if he was on death's door. i honestly thought he needed to go to the emergency room until I discovered that all of this moaning and carrying on was the result of a stuffy nose and a sore throat. Yes, my man child has a minor cold. He wasn't having an asthma attack or appendicitis or even the flu. He kept me up all night moaning and rolling around the bed and demanded I get him medicine at 1 am and take care of him. He was freaking out bc yellow mucus was coming out of his nose. Finally I did go out and get him stuff to shut him up so that I could sleep. (I needed to be at work at 630 this morning.) After I gave him the medicine and babyed him, he went to sleep with no trouble. I am exhausted today, and want to punch him in the face. He of course is home sick. He did have tha audacity to text me to tell me I picked him up the wrong medicine and that he still feels sick. I told him his behavior last night was insane. Is there anyway to address this? He seems to think that because he is sick he can act anyway he wants. I'm happy to pick up some oj and chicken soup after work, but that is the extent of my sympathy for a minor cold. 5
ASG Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Have you never heard of man flu? This is it. Just deal with it... there's really not a lot that you can do. Either leave him be or take care of him! I'm sorry this is the way it is, but it is a known aflition! 8
Michelle ma Belle Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Reading your opening post made me laugh out loud! I've yet to meet a man who didn't turn into a whiny little boy whenever he got a whiff of sick no matter how big or small. It can get seriously annoying, I agree but that's how they role. And they say women are over dramatic, HA! 8
hippychick3 Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 My BF is the same way. I'll never forget the first time he was sick after just a few weeks of dating. We were supposed to go out on a Friday night and he texted me that day telling me he was sick. I thought at the time he was canceling on me and trying to get out of seeing me as he didn't seem that sick. I told him to feel better and I would make other plans that night. He then said, "Why would you do that?! I want you to come over and take care of me!" And that's how it's been ever since with even the most minor "sniffle." It's very annoying, but I'm used to it now!
preraph Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Good God. Pack him off to his mother's. She's who did this to him. 8
Toodaloo Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 There is science behind this. Men do have a much lower threshold to pain than women do! Next time it happens just go and sleep on the sofa... As someone who does suffer badly (I have a very poor immune system, cold viruses and flu viruses nearly did kill me a few years ago so I am now paranoid about it!!! ) when I get colds and flu I can tell you now I am a really grumpy so and so... I usually decamp to the sofa and set myself up with everything I need. I get very anti social. 1
Sunkissedpatio Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Welcome to the man-baby motherhood club! I hate to make generalizations but I can confidently say I have yet to meet a man that does not become unbearably needy when he gets a cold. In his defense he may have been running a fever hence the super erratic behaviour. Be patient and count to 10, if you love this man there will be many more like this. Now you know. 5
preraph Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Reading your opening post made me laugh out loud! I've yet to meet a man who didn't turn into a whiny little boy whenever he got a whiff of sick no matter how big or small. It can get seriously annoying, I agree but that's how they role. And they say women are over dramatic, HA! Jeez, I've encountered just the opposite. It's mostly always been men who won't admit they're sick or won't go to the doctor, won't stay home a day from work to recuperate, don't think it's manly to be sick. I live in Texas, God save me. 2
preraph Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 There is science behind this. Men do have a much lower threshold to pain than women do! Next time it happens just go and sleep on the sofa... As someone who does suffer badly (I have a very poor immune system, cold viruses and flu viruses nearly did kill me a few years ago so I am now paranoid about it!!! ) when I get colds and flu I can tell you now I am a really grumpy so and so... I usually decamp to the sofa and set myself up with everything I need. I get very anti social. I'm the same way. With the possible exception of someone dropping something tasty off on the porch or some Nyquil, I do not want to be disturbed when I'm sick. I better get over that because I'm soon to be 64.
Author Parrotlet Posted September 23, 2016 Author Posted September 23, 2016 I had no idea this was a thing. This is my 3rd long term relationship, and it's the first time I've ever experienced this. My past boyfriends have been very stoic about being sick. Neither of them would ever have demanded a night time drug store visit except in a true emergency. (Nor would I for that matter.) For the record, I did go to sleep on the couch. However he was moaning so loudly, I still couldn't sleep. Apparently I bought him zzzquil at 2am instead of night quill. I honestly was trying to drug him with sleeping medicine, but of the cold fighting variety. I didn't even know that zzzquil wasn't cold medicine. He was quite miffed when he found out this morn.
Haydn Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Man flu is no laughing matter. You have no idea;) 6
Redhead14 Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 My boyfriend has a mild cold. He is acting like he is on death's door. I was sympathetic, but, in my opinion, he has veered into crazy town. Last night, my boyfriend mentioned that he had a tickly throat and a stuffy nose. He felt well enough to go to the gym and get drinks with a friend. However, when I saw him later he was DYING. He was moaning, appeared to have trouble breathing, was rolling around in bed and generally acting as if he was on death's door. i honestly thought he needed to go to the emergency room until I discovered that all of this moaning and carrying on was the result of a stuffy nose and a sore throat. Yes, my man child has a minor cold. He wasn't having an asthma attack or appendicitis or even the flu. He kept me up all night moaning and rolling around the bed and demanded I get him medicine at 1 am and take care of him. He was freaking out bc yellow mucus was coming out of his nose. Finally I did go out and get him stuff to shut him up so that I could sleep. (I needed to be at work at 630 this morning.) After I gave him the medicine and babyed him, he went to sleep with no trouble. I am exhausted today, and want to punch him in the face. He of course is home sick. He did have tha audacity to text me to tell me I picked him up the wrong medicine and that he still feels sick. I told him his behavior last night was insane. Is there anyway to address this? He seems to think that because he is sick he can act anyway he wants. I'm happy to pick up some oj and chicken soup after work, but that is the extent of my sympathy for a minor cold. Guess what, it's a common phenomenon. Every woman has a story like this about her BF/husband In my mind, though, it's kinda cute. He's showing his soft under belly and being a little vulnerable . . . men don't like a lot of babying, nurturing, usually, but once in a while they still do want their mommy Unless he's sick every week, you might just need to be mommy once in a while. (Think of it as practice for when you do have kids). My SO falls apart over a paper cut But, when I was in a terrible car accident, he did everything he possibly could to make me comfortable and feel safe again. And, when he almost lost his hand at work, he tried everything he could not to upset me and minimize it . . . Don't sweat the small stuff. It's not important that he's a baby when he's sick, what's important is whether or not he takes care of YOU when you're sick. This goes both ways. 1
kendahke Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 I had no idea this was a thing. This is my 3rd long term relationship, and it's the first time I've ever experienced this. My past boyfriends have been very stoic about being sick. Neither of them would ever have demanded a night time drug store visit except in a true emergency. (Nor would I for that matter.) For the record, I did go to sleep on the couch. However he was moaning so loudly, I still couldn't sleep. Apparently I bought him zzzquil at 2am instead of night quill. I honestly was trying to drug him with sleeping medicine, but of the cold fighting variety. I didn't even know that zzzquil wasn't cold medicine. He was quite miffed when he found out this morn. Girl... I'd have put the ear buds in my ears and listened to rain instead. I wouldn't leave the house for anything less than 101 degree fever or a trip to the ER. There really is no cold medicine once you've got the common cold. You have to just soldier through. Zquil is only for sleeping--it's the ingredient they put in Nyquil to make you sleep. Nyquil is generally for flu symptoms, which he doesn't have. It would be very obvious had he had the flu. At most, he's got a sinus infection and he needs to see the doctor about that--there's really nothing you could have bought to address that without a prescription anyway. But yeah. You've got a big baby. Slap his mother the next time you see her. She grew that.
preraph Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 The Nyquil has to be bought from a pharmacy in the US, but the pharmacy version, not the one out on the shelves, has the ONLY effective decongestant in it.
GemmaUK Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Wow! I just wouldn't give in to that type of crap! I've never dated a man who did that (there is one though who I suspect probably would have been similar if he had got sick before I dumped him). I'm not into being babyed either. No way would I have gone out at that time of night. I think I'd stock up on cold and flu stuff and stick it in his beside drawer. If he gets a cold again I'd be on the sofa or in the spare room with my earplugs in!
alphamale Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 ..., and want to punch him in the face. not a good course of action as that would be assault. just ignore him and call him out for the big baby that he is
TunaCat Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 There's no way in HELL I'd put up with that. I'd have told him to call his mother and have HER go get him medicine at 1am because I have to be up early to go to work. I refuse to coddle another adult. 1
BaileyB Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 The dreaded man cold... Feared by women everywhere. There is nothing that can be done to help a man cold except to wait it out;). 2
smackie9 Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Men.........that's all I have to say.....men.:rolleyes::rolleyes:
jen1447 Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 I hate it too - don't get as many foot massages.
preraph Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Well, I'd go get him medicine, but i wouldn't wait for the middle of the night for him to ask me to. I'd probably already have some in my cabinet for myself. I'd get him everything he needs and tell him to go to a doctor if it got bad. But I would also not sleep with him and tell him "I can't afford to get sick." 1
LostOnes05 Posted September 23, 2016 Posted September 23, 2016 Well, it sounds like he has a sinus infection from what you stated. Your mucus should never be yellow or green, as that's a sign of infection. Only gets worse if you don't get antibiotics to clear it up. This coming from someone who has had them a lot. You can't sleep, because you can't breathe. And you can't get better if you don't rest. Usually, you can make it through the day doing most things but nighttime is the worst. And if you have post-nasal drip forget about sleeping laying down. He probably needs a Z-pak if it is indeed a sinus infection. But I do wonder if all the people saying that he's a big baby and they wouldn't do this and that for him would say that if it the roles were reversed. Sometimes it is difficult to sympathize with people when they are sick because you aren't experiencing the symptoms, only the inconvenience.
preraph Posted September 24, 2016 Posted September 24, 2016 ^ I agree, but there is a middle ground. And he's not in it. I had a bf once whose mother ignored him when he was sick, so not only did he have zero empathy for anyone who was sick, but he got mad about it and resented it because it brought up bad memories. But most people would maybe ask for a thing or two but not just use the occasion to make you their servant. And most people with just a cold are perfectly able to make a trip to the pharmacy too. See, if someone is maintaining themselves to a reasonable degree then you might not mind so much pampering them with a little chicken soup. 2
Sunkissedpatio Posted September 24, 2016 Posted September 24, 2016 Sometimes it is difficult to sympathize with people when they are sick because you aren't experiencing the symptoms, only the inconvenience. It's pretty safe to say every single person on the planet has experienced a flu, a cold and or a sinus infection. Like other women have mentioned, I just want to be left alone when I have a flu. Don't pester me, don't try to bring me back to health, if I don't feel like talking much respect that, yes offer to pick up medicine and if I need I will take you up on it but just let me go into my corner and heal. I'll be back to my cheerful wonderful self soon enough. But right now let me die alone. I think women and men are very different this way. I found what works best is to wait until the craziness passes a bit so don't try to talk him out of his insanity the first day. Best remedy for sinus infection just cook him some homemade chicken soup (keep the carcass of the chicken in the soup and boil the bones in the soup because there are great properties like amino acid, cystine, that helps boost the immune system and cuts some of the mucus) so it instantly works to clear the sinuses. Throw in shiitake mushrooms, fresh oregano and lots of garlic which are all also great to boost immune system. Then of course whatever medicine they prefer to curb the symptoms. And lots of sleep/rest. Then once they are better you let them have it. You knock him out again with the punch you were saving from the other night. Just kidding.... ok, you kiss him and tell him you are happy he is feeling better and tell him next time he puts you though a hell-ish night like that you expect a new bag or a piece of jewelry hahah that'll cure him
five2nine Posted September 24, 2016 Posted September 24, 2016 I would have gone to get the medicine as long as he takes of me when I'm sick or in other ways. Guys like to be babied and taken care of. They have to be tough in public most other times, so being vulnerable at home and cared for by their s/o is special I think.
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