Theory Posted September 21, 2016 Posted September 21, 2016 I've been seeing this girl for a little over a month now. During the week I usually don't hear from her, and I'll text her to set up a date for the weekend. After this, she'll text me from time to time over the next few days and we have fun when we finally meet to go out. Even after the date she'll text sometimes and say she had a nice time. But after that date, I don't hear from her at all the following week unless I text her. Even if I wait until Wednesday or Thursday. So, what should I do? I have come up with a few options: 1. Wait and see if she texts me. Maybe I'm becoming too predictable and she is just starting to expect it. 2. Man up and text her to set up a date. Maybe she feels more comfortable after I contact her. 3. Text her about something else and see if she brings up getting together or asks about my weekend plans. Any thoughts? I've been setting up and planning ALL of the dates so far.
fred123 Posted September 21, 2016 Posted September 21, 2016 id back off. up to her to initiate and ask u out. been in your situation. doesn't end well. you have no idea her interest levels for you. she could just be going along with plans cos shes lukewarm, nothing better to do, wants attention, etc. you have shown you are interested. now its her turn. one month is more than enough. let her text and plan. texting means nothing 2
ThisOverThat Posted September 22, 2016 Posted September 22, 2016 So you two are meeting solely on your terms (you do the planning) once a week? Why's this a problem? Sounds like those days apart are the opportune time to entertain other ladies or at least attempt to. Is she the only woman that you are talking to? Do you have some desire to be exclusive with her?
travelbug1996 Posted September 22, 2016 Posted September 22, 2016 man up please if you like her. women dont like passive men. 1
Author Theory Posted September 29, 2016 Author Posted September 29, 2016 Sorry for the late reply, I didn't get any notifications that you guys had responded and thought the thread was dead until I just searched for it. So I see what you're saying, but I guess it's just strange to me because it's been about a month and a half, and most girls I dated had occasionally tried to set up a date by now. Even if I'm the one doing most of the planning, it seems like she could suggest something. We've had 7 - 8 dates, and it's been all me. It seems like I'm putting in way more effort than she is, which tells me that either I'm more invested than she is at this point, or that she's just not interested. We have slept together, but that's no indication of seriousness I guess. I'm almost always the one to initiate a hug, or kiss, or whatever. What should I do? Back up and give her some space and see if she comes to me, or just move on?
GottaBeBoosted Posted September 29, 2016 Posted September 29, 2016 Hmm.. That could be touchy I guess. When I was dating I always waited for the guy to text me first and/or initiate the date. However, if I was genuinely interested, I made sure it was obvious that I was. I would try to show that I was excited to be hearing from them etc.. I always felt like guys gave the impression that girls were too needy or too clingy if they texted first and I guess that's why I became the way I did & I'm sure there are more like that out there. In hindsight, you could take a break from texting her and see if she texts you first. If she really likes you, she will. It has been plenty long enough for her to decide if she does.
Author Theory Posted September 29, 2016 Author Posted September 29, 2016 Hmm.. That could be touchy I guess. When I was dating I always waited for the guy to text me first and/or initiate the date. However, if I was genuinely interested, I made sure it was obvious that I was. I would try to show that I was excited to be hearing from them etc.. I always felt like guys gave the impression that girls were too needy or too clingy if they texted first and I guess that's why I became the way I did & I'm sure there are more like that out there. In hindsight, you could take a break from texting her and see if she texts you first. If she really likes you, she will. It has been plenty long enough for her to decide if she does. We spoke briefly in person, and she didn't seem super into it. But then as we were parting ways she said to text her if I wanted to hang out this weekend. Me: "Sure, when are you free?" Her:"I don't know, I'll have to check my schedule" Me: "I'll be anxiously awaiting the news" (sarcastic, but jokingly) After that she got kind of quiet, we said a few words and she just got in her car to leave. No hug or kiss goodbye. I don't know if I came off as a jerk, or if she's over reacting, or what. Do I even text her to hang out this weekend? Or back off for a bit? So confused.
GottaBeBoosted Posted October 6, 2016 Posted October 6, 2016 We spoke briefly in person, and she didn't seem super into it. But then as we were parting ways she said to text her if I wanted to hang out this weekend. Me: "Sure, when are you free?" Her:"I don't know, I'll have to check my schedule" Me: "I'll be anxiously awaiting the news" (sarcastic, but jokingly) After that she got kind of quiet, we said a few words and she just got in her car to leave. No hug or kiss goodbye. I don't know if I came off as a jerk, or if she's over reacting, or what. Do I even text her to hang out this weekend? Or back off for a bit? So confused. Yeah, that seems pretty odd and stand offish on her part. Have you heard from her since then??
Erik30 Posted October 6, 2016 Posted October 6, 2016 We spoke briefly in person, and she didn't seem super into it. But then as we were parting ways she said to text her if I wanted to hang out this weekend. Me: "Sure, when are you free?" Her:"I don't know, I'll have to check my schedule" Me: "I'll be anxiously awaiting the news" (sarcastic, but jokingly) After that she got kind of quiet, we said a few words and she just got in her car to leave. No hug or kiss goodbye. I don't know if I came off as a jerk, or if she's over reacting, or what. Do I even text her to hang out this weekend? Or back off for a bit? So confused. Why would she have to check her schedule when she was the one who suggested it? Weird... Maybe she meant it like "we should hang out some time," like some people do, even though they have no intention of following through. I would text her once to try to make plans. (That's what she wanted initially) If she gives you a lame excuse, she's not interested anymore. 1
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