how does a man trust a woman when what she's saying now might not be true in a few mo

[Drivetildriven]

My girlfriend of 3yrs broke up with me last month. Over the years she has sent me cards, letters, poetry, notes, etc. and told me how much I mean to her, how she's mine forever, etc. However over the several months, her feelings for me have grown to become less romantic and more friendly in nature. When she broke up with me she said that she loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore.

 

As I read the postings on some of these forums, its the same thing. The woman has some kind of change of heart. So my question is how does a man trust a woman when what she's saying now might not be true in a few months or years.

 

For me now, i'm so jaded that a woman can profess anything to me and its all bull****.

[Kat]

You can't paint every woman with the same brush.

 

Not all women are selfish, lying, and manipulative bitches.... just a few and they are always someones ex for a reason

[Pocky]

Love isn't a promise written in stone. Find it, enjoy it to the fullest, miss it when it's gone and realize that it can come and go in the blink of an eye.

[Drivetildriven]

If she's anything like her sister she'll be several guys ex. But hope she isn't...

[Kat]

People change and as long as they meant what they said when they said it, you are luckier than most

[Drivetildriven]

I suppose you're right. She's the type of girl that needs to be made jealous. I made myself easy for her for far too long. I hope she sees me out with some chick before I see her out with some F-ing dude.

[moimeme]

Men who post threads with titles like 'women are unstable' betray their inability to comprehend that the fact that SOME women may be unstable does not mean that ALL women are unstable.

[Drivetildriven]

You're right, just the ones who guys write about on these forums.

[Zaira]

Originally posted by Drivetildriven

My girlfriend of 3yrs broke up with me last month. Over the years she has sent me cards, letters, poetry, notes, etc. and told me how much I mean to her, how she's mine forever, etc. However over the several months, her feelings for me have grown to become less romantic and more friendly in nature. When she broke up with me she said that she loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore.

 

As I read the postings on some of these forums, its the same thing. The woman has some kind of change of heart. So my question is how does a man trust a woman when what she's saying now might not be true in a few months or years.

 

For me now, i'm so jaded that a woman can profess anything to me and its all bull****.

 

I used to send cards, letters and write poetry to my boyfriend of four years etc etc. We broke up a few months back. Why? Because we weren't IN love anymore. We were both hurt by the break up and we both wanted it to be "perfect" forever, but it just wasn't going to happen. Better to know now and be able to move on and find happiness, than to stay together and not being happy at all.

 

PS: It happens with girls, it happens with guys - people change, relationships break up. It doesn't mean they're unstable. It might mean that you'll find it hard to trust in a relationship again, but that will change in time and with the right person.

[Drivetildriven]

Ok, well here's a new question. Do woman like men that are hard to get?

[VirginiaBob]

what you are talking about is infatuation feelings, not real love. you can fall in and out of infatuation in a very short time. Love is not a feeling. It is a choice that you make, a decision, a commitment. Jesus (if that is your belief) gives us very clear direction on what love is and none of it involves feelings. you can' t fall out of love or in love. love is forever but you have to decide to do it.

[Drivetildriven]

Bob, that's the best thing I have ever heard and you are damn right. It is a choice, not some flighty thing that comes and goes.

[Kat]

Originally posted by Drivetildriven

Ok, well here's a new question. Do woman like men that are hard to get?

I was atracted to my man for the following reasons. He was honest, caring, kind, open, and respected me and my family.

 

Being hard to get or easy has nothing to do with it for me

[Zaira]

Originally posted by Drivetildriven

Ok, well here's a new question. Do woman like men that are hard to get?

 

Some do, some don't. We are all individuals and think/work differently

[Drivetildriven]

My ex woman was 24 going on 19. She said that for her, passion is the most important thing in a relationship and for her, after three years, that wore off. She even said that she doen't think she'll ever find someone who treated her as well as I did. She cried so much when we broke up, you'd think i was breaking up with her.

[Drivetildriven]

And it's not like I'm some boring super nice guy, door mat. I work out, have a nice car, ride a fast bike, am in the military. Hell, I'm going to war in November. I dunno. I've got three dates with three different girls this coming week. It's too early for me to be real interested in them, which might not be fair to them, but I'll take them out and show them a nice time. If it gets my mind off her, or somehow gets back to her and makes her jealous than its a win win situation.

[Drivetildriven]

I'm just going to move on like she's never coming back, while maintaining a small hope in the back of my head that she will. I don't think that's too unreasonable. I've been in some good relationships in the past, but no one has ever come close to making me as happy as she has (aside from the utterly crushing heartbreak).

[Zaira]

Originally posted by Drivetildriven

My ex woman was 24 going on 19. She said that for her, passion is the most important thing in a relationship and for her, after three years, that wore off. She even said that she doen't think she'll ever find someone who treated her as well as I did. She cried so much when we broke up, you'd think i was breaking up with her.

 

Passion the MOST important thing? She has a lot to learn.

[Drivetildriven]

That's what I think and that's what my friends have said. But it's not something I can tell her. I guess she's gotta learn the hard way.

[J dub]

something tells me shes gonna be back

[Jadey]

Never ever put women or men in the same boxes!! Even i dont do that and ive been let doqwn by males endless times Theres nice ones out there. I like to think of myself as an example For real tho..Im nota bitch,.

[Drivetildriven]

One of my chick friends called me a while ago to say that my ex sent her and some of my other chick friends an email informing them of our breakup, if they didn't already know (some of them didn't, I haven't told everyone). In it my ex said that she still wants to be friends with them, and that for the past three years she hasn't been herself. She said that she's felt like being in a couple defined her and she wasn't happy or herself. She said that now she's who she wants to be, she's so happy and has all theses plans and that they should all keep in contact. What I said and what my friend said was, who the hell was she for the last three years?????? I can tell you my ex was more comfortable around me than anyone. Not herself?? She sure as hell put on a good show about being happy, and COMFORTABLE for EVERYONE. Talk about negating the last three years of my life.