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my ex asked if I could never see us being serious again.


unrequitedlove11

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unrequitedlove11

We've been broken up for 3 years and that same year we broke up, he got married although we were still seeing each other and being intimate. I didn't know until 6 months later when he moved away from her and then we fell out bad. He texted me May 2014 apologizing, I accepted it and was looking forward to moving on.

 

I received another apology in July 2016 saying "Always kinda knew I'd be punished for what I did to you however I never could have guessed it would be this devastating and draining I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy, even if we never speak again in life I just want you to truly know how sorry I really am, from the bottom of my heart I'm sincerely sorry ...". In the back of my mind I'm like why does he keep apologizing?

 

Im guessing he came to visit the second week of August and wanted to meet up but I was so nervous about seeing him that we never did. Days later here comes this: "So you could never see yourself being serious with me ever again ?". I was actually speechless and it took me a minute to reply but the only thing I could say was "it's not me, it's you". I know it's cliche but I honestly didn't know what to say.

 

I asked if him he thought deserved that and he said probably not but that he could earn it. Then I brought up the fact that he's still married so idk if they're divorcing because he told me he was moving back. I'm trying to make sense of it all and I honestly feel like he's trying to get back in good with me because he's moving back.

 

But I'm such a hopeless romantic, part of me feels like what if it works the second time? And then the other part of me is saying don't fall for it... After I tried to dig deeper to see where this was even coming from, he replied with "Look T the bond I had with you was the greatest bond I ever had with anyone you might not believe that because of what I did but at the time I didn't kno either I've grown a lot I wish you could see but I understand how much pain and what not I've caused I'm sorry for bringing it up".

 

I haven't talked to him in 2 weeks because I never texted him back. But there's so much I want to say to him even though I feel like no matter what or how many times I say it, he will never fully understand because he doesn't know how it felt. Should I let him know how I feel or let it be?

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1st, is he still married to that other woman?

 

If he still is married then tell him to be single then talk to you. You dont want to be his back up plan, do u?

 

If he is divorced or in the mid of it, then u can proceed to talk it out face to face and see where this leads to.

 

Even after the break up 3 yrs ago he still contact u means he has feelings for you and you have feelings for him too. But u need to take time to find out his true intentions.

 

Is he taking u as an option or he truely feel that he want to spend his life with you?

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Jersey born raised

Run !

 

Sounds like his wife commited adultery and he is looking for a revenge adultery or a rebound fling. Either way you are inn for a worid of hurt. Go over to the wayward forum. One in ten(?) woman went down that path.

 

Do not let him cry on your shoulder, do let him say I made such a huge mistake you are so much better then her. Block him on social media and on your phone.

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  • 3 weeks later...
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unrequitedlove11
1st, is he still married to that other woman?

 

If he still is married then tell him to be single then talk to you. You dont want to be his back up plan, do u?

 

If he is divorced or in the mid of it, then u can proceed to talk it out face to face and see where this leads to.

 

Even after the break up 3 yrs ago he still contact u means he has feelings for you and you have feelings for him too. But u need to take time to find out his true intentions.

 

Is he taking u as an option or he truely feel that he want to spend his life with you?

 

 

He's still married but when I asked how he was going to "earn another chance" by still being in that situation he responded by saying never mind and would talk about it another time... but it hasn't come up yet. He texted me last Wednesday at 10:00am saying this:

 

This is not me coming on to you or anything I don't mean to make you feel uncomfortable or anything I'm not looking for you to say anything back, I understand how you might feel about me I understand you could never be with me again but I really just want you to know I miss EVERYTHING about you from the smallest things you can think of to the biggest, and thanks for still being my friend now if you would even call it that or just being cool with me or whatever it means alot to me .

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unrequitedlove11
Run !

 

Sounds like his wife commited adultery and he is looking for a revenge adultery or a rebound fling. Either way you are inn for a worid of hurt. Go over to the wayward forum. One in ten(?) woman went down that path.

 

Do not let him cry on your shoulder, do let him say I made such a huge mistake you are so much better then her. Block him on social media and on your phone.

 

At this point I have lost some feelings for him because I feel like why are you trying to come back now? You should've "changed" or grew up back then... However I did say being there for people in their time of need is just who I am, I can't help that. I would never leave someone I cared about out to dry even though he does deserve it because that's kind of what he did to me.

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He's hedging his bets. He wants the go ahead from you before he decides whether to leave his wife. Although from what he's saying, leaving her isn't about to happen

 

I don't think I could forgive him not telling you he was married and getting back with you

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Lets hope that in three years you have changed and so has he. You are not the same people you were then. Move along with the understanding that one of you has grown out of this "past" liaison and needs to be the mature one.

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