SingleHawaiian Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 I've been catching the bus with this guy every day for over a year. At first, I could tell he was shy - arms crossed, looking at the floor etc. he's not the type I'm usually interested in but there's something about him. He's started to relax but he's difficult to read. I want to say hi but he makes me nervous. We have exchanged glances from afar but sometimes I see him look away and smile/giggle to himself. if I'm talking to a friend, his eyes don't leave my face. There are other times were we have been standing close & the eye contact is intense. Every time this happens, I look away. I don't mean to, it's just the nerves. I know I'm supposed to smile but I freak out. There was one time when the bus was so full we were standing almost shoulder to shoulder. He kept turning to look at me but his breathing became quite fast. I wasn't sure if I made him uncomfortable in a good or bad way. We have also crossed paths during lunch. Again, my nerves let me down & I freeze up. My friends think it's hilarious because I could just stop mid-way through a sentence until he walked by. I've never made the first move & I would only do it if I was at least 95% sure I had a chance. I mean, last week I caught him watching me but he looked angry/disappointed. What do I do? Does it sound like he's interested? Any insights from shy guys would help a lot!
Nowty V Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 You know absolutely nothing about him, right? So, potentially, he could be a High Functioning Psychopath, that's why you can't read him.
Author SingleHawaiian Posted September 18, 2016 Author Posted September 18, 2016 You know absolutely nothing about him, right? So, potentially, he could be a High Functioning Psychopath, that's why you can't read him. Interesting but I doubt it.
Buddhist Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 He's probably just enjoying the effect he has on you and has no intentions of anything other than having an effect on you.
basil67 Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 You cannot gauge his interest without experiencing personal interaction.
OnlyHonesty Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Sometimes a guy just enjoys a little window shopping, it doesn't always mean anything.
mortensorchid Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Have you actually SAID anything to him? Even "Hello how are you?" Otherwise it sounds like you two are just giving each other looks and nothing could potentially happen other than that. Like the last poster said, he might just be window shopping.
preraph Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 (edited) Sounds like neither one of you are equipped to follow through or take the least little chance, so maybe neither of you are ready to date yet. He's no doubt enjoying the crush of a stranger and getting his jollies that way and probably going home and thinking of you while he gets himself off, but if he's so fearful he can't talk to you after all the times you've seen him and been near him, then, I don't see the point. If he had an ounce of courage, he'd have talked and asked you out by now. If he doesn't, what exactly are you hoping he'll morph into? This is him. And if you did ask him out or give him your number, he'd probably peg you as promiscuous and mark you down for that, because fearful anxious guys usually don't like the least whiff of a woman who potentially might be more experienced than them (which means virginal). If you are determined to land this skittish fish, then your best bet is to begin having casual conversation with him. It's doubtful, but it's also possible you're misreading his actions as shyness when in fact he is taken and not talking to other women, though enjoying if one is interested. Edited September 18, 2016 by preraph
ThisOverThat Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 It shouldn't take you, me, or anyone a year to say ANYTHING to ANYBODY. Until you get over this fear or whatever it is of saying something to people that you want to say something to...don't worry about it!
smackie9 Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 (edited) Good lord just say hi to him...throw him a bone. Even if all you get is a friendly conversation out of him, at least you have made contact. Nothing wrong with making the first move.....break the ice, introduce yourself. And don't be shy to "suggest" grabbing a coffee with him sometime....I speak from experience, asking a guy out doesn't peg you as a sloot....that is folk lore. IMO you both have an attraction going on. You both have been making eyes with each other for over a year, so it's not like you are complete strangers. His reason for not making a move? Maybe he has a GF, maybe he never gets attention from girls, maybe he is a virgin has no experience, too shy lacks confidence, maybe he suffers from anxiety, etc. BUT you won't know unless you make contact with him...if you feel it's worth it then go for it. Don't take his disappointment personally....I bet money on it he is pissed at himself for not having the bal%$ to do anything about it. Edited September 18, 2016 by smackie9
Recommended Posts