SirGOT4life Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Hi everyone, I'm a little confused and really need help on where to go/what to do. I'm just starting my second year at uni, and 8 days ago I was at a house warming for a house where few of my friends (same uni course as me) live. After the party I walked back with 3 of my mates (2 girls and a guy - all yet again same course as me) to get a takeaway. After that, we went back to the the 2 girls house and chilled there. One of the girls went to her room and the guy went to sleep on a sofa. The other girl said I could sleep in her bed, which I did, after talking for a long while in just our underwear. The next night i slept in her bed again, just in our underwear. The next few nights we had mutual friends that were having parties and we both attended, and chatted and a bit of flirting banter. Now is the bit that confuses me. Myself and the girl are in the same friendship circle but we never spoke much 1 to 1, only on 2 brief occasions if I remember. And we never spoke over the summer after the first year of uni. So why would she sleep in just her underwear with me on two occasions (one drunk and one sober). There was no sex which would probably suggest that I was friendzoned BUT we were only friends because all of our friends were friends with each other. So we don't know anything much about each other, but yet she felt comfortable sleeping in just her underwear in the same bed as me (I was in my underwear). Since then we have been flirting/flirtatious banter with each other. I'm 22 and shes 18 if that counts for anything. Could she be into me? I'm kinda into her and we have been getting to know eachother well for the last few days. Thank you for any advice given
PogoStick Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 In general, I think anytime a girl is sleeping with you in her underwear it means she is interested. If she's not interested, then you are 100% friend-zoned, because she isn't going to do that with someone she doesn't like. Considering the age difference, the weight is on you as the older, experienced, guy to make the move. How you end up in a girls bed, almost naked, twice! and never made a move...I have no fking idea. I suggest you flirt heavy and seal the deal the next chance you get, unless you want to be the emasculated friend that she thinks of as just another girl she is sharing her bed with. Hint: if you end up in a party situation with her, lay a quick, passionate kiss on her as you're passing by to let her get excited about later in the evening.
Author SirGOT4life Posted September 18, 2016 Author Posted September 18, 2016 Yeah I will definitely try sometime soon. The only thing that tells me she isn't interested is that fact we never text each other apart from once or twice haha. In my uni house, I live with 3 of my mates, which one of them is my ex (we were together, and also lived together when choosing the house) and the girl I'm kinda interested always asks stuff about what it is like living with my ex, and that it must be tough. I see this girl nearly everyday and each time she asks them samet questions. She also seems to be mesmerised by the fact I'm 4 years older than her haha
joyful Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 you should just ask her to do something one-on-one and take it from there, especially if you are into her and not just looking for a convenient (possibly drunken) hookup. 1
smudge21 Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Ever thought that she's asking the exact same questions right now. Why would a guy sleep in the same bed in his underwear, etc etc... If you like her and want to see if there's more here, then ask away. It's much better to know for sure then find out years later and regret you never did anything. 1
phineas Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 If a woman did that with me i'd try to sleep with her. If she rejected my advances i'd get out of the bed and sleep somewhere else. I do not sleep with women who won't sleep with me. I am not a cuddlebitch nor am I looking to reach the Nth level of sexual frustration. 1
Shanex Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 I've been there too, when I was your age. Afterwards a party and we were fairly tipsy. Though we were only the two of us home and I could have done or try something. Same situation, we almost cuddled and were wearing underwears. That says enough for me: She IS interested.. try something in the next few days, reach out to her the way you want/can. A woman, a girl, doesn't sleep with a man in underwear if not interested. Doesn't mean it has to happen the first night, but still...
ThisOverThat Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 Ha Ha Ha! Please tell me you're joking. You were in a bed with a woman you're attracted to on two occasions and NOTHING happened? And you both were wearing minimal clothing? C'mon bro. This can't be real. 1
ThisOverThat Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 And what were you thinking the second night you went to her bed, took your clothes off, watched her take her's off, and proceeded to lay down?
ThisOverThat Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 I'm sorry but I have to... So did she put the pillows in the middle of the bed and say 'This is my side and that's yours'? Did she sleep under the covers/blanket/sheets and you on top of them?
smackie9 Posted September 18, 2016 Posted September 18, 2016 (edited) If a woman did that with me i'd try to sleep with her. If she rejected my advances i'd get out of the bed and sleep somewhere else. I do not sleep with women who won't sleep with me. I am not a cuddlebitch nor am I looking to reach the Nth level of sexual frustration. This 100%^^^^^^^ IMO stop sleeping in her bed unless you are going to throw a *&^p into her. If you want a relationship, then just ask her out on a date and go through the process of texting and all that crap. Sorry but you are 22 years old not 15...you are a man, you should know these things by now. Edited September 18, 2016 by smackie9
Author SirGOT4life Posted September 19, 2016 Author Posted September 19, 2016 Looking back, I definitely should have made a move. But it's weird because she doesn't give guys she's interested in any special attention in public, so that did flag up the whole "should I make a move on her" thought while in the bed. This was only less that a week ago so I'm sure she wouldn't have lost any interest straightaway. Maybe whats holding her back from giving me more signs of intereat in public is the fact that her ex studies same course as us and he is also in the broad friendship group, even though me and him are not close. I think I'm just the kind of guy that needs to see signs of interest before I make a move. Yeah I know we were both in bed in underwear but that was the only sign of interest up to that point. I think ideally I want to sleep with her rather than have anything serious with her.
smackie9 Posted September 19, 2016 Posted September 19, 2016 Then just throw a h ump into her next time you are invited into her bed. Confident guys don't need a "signal" they just go for it. Be that guy.
Shanex Posted September 19, 2016 Posted September 19, 2016 Then just throw a h ump into her next time you are invited into her bed. Confident guys don't need a "signal" they just go for it. Be that guy. I agree, but men occasionally 'screw up', even confident guys.. I can sympathise with the OP because I was once there too, didn't make my move because she was a friend of a friend, we were tipsy etc. It's easy to say ''I am a man, not a teddybear'' but when you're in the bed and in the situation, it's pretty different.
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