RandomlyHearbroken Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 I really don't know where to start but me and my ex we together for 2 years and talked for almost 3; im only 16 years old and this is my first love. We have been broken up for about 6 months but we have been talking everyday until about a month ago. She started acting like she didn't want to talk me and out 2 weeks ago we talked andwe agreed to not to talk for a while. Well today I contacted her thinking im going to fix this, to my surprise she is in a relationship. This just eats me away, I love her so much and I feel like she is the only one for me. I really don't know what to do with myself, I feel like I can't do anything :'(
DarrenB Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 First loves are always hard to get over, regardless of the situation. Also, one of your first real break-ups can seriously take a toll on you. But you're young, you're 16 and the world is your oyster. You have experienced one of the more hurtful things in life; you may now take this on board and apply this for any future reference to be a better and more experienced person. Believe me, it does feel like 'you'll never find anyone like her' and all that mallarkey... but in hindsight you will and you will be happy again. You're right, you cannot do anything. You cannot do anything to get her back. She has moved on, it is unfortunate and hurts so much... but she has, and now it's your turn to. You can do it mate, I believe in you. Also, look up No Contact. Something almost EVERYONE will advise you to do. This will benefit you in the longrun 1
mg4514 Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 I'm 44, and there's nothing I can say that won't sound condescending, but I'll take a shot. You're 16, and at your age, in high school...there is nothing unusual about the feelings of a teenage girl changing on a whim. She's just as likely to be in three more relationships before I finish typing this message. Listen to what I'm telling you. You're young...pace yourself, because you're gonna experience this kind of loss many times throughout your life. And you know what? Your gonna be on the other end of things too at some point...you're gonna be breaking the heart of some young girl, and I'll be here, telling her the same thing I'm telling you. If you were my son, I'd tell you this: At your age, I don't want you thinking about love. I don't want you thinking about marriage or babies either. I want you to use this experience as a learning tool to help you figure out things you want, and don't want, as you get older. I want you to think about your studies, about your future, about getting a good job. When you've mastered control over your own feelings, and your own life, then I want you to concentrate on making a family, being a good provider, and the most important thing: being a fine role model for your own son. Take good care of yourself. 1
Author RandomlyHearbroken Posted September 16, 2016 Author Posted September 16, 2016 (edited) First loves are always hard to get over, regardless of the situation. Also, one of your first real break-ups can seriously take a toll on you. But you're young, you're 16 and the world is your oyster. You have experienced one of the more hurtful things in life; you may now take this on board and apply this for any future reference to be a better and more experienced person. Believe me, it does feel like 'you'll never find anyone like her' and all that mallarkey... but in hindsight you will and you will be happy again. You're right, you cannot do anything. You cannot do anything to get her back. She has moved on, it is unfortunate and hurts so much... but she has, and now it's your turn to. You can do it mate, I believe in you. Also, look up No Contact. Something almost EVERYONE will advise you to do. This will benefit you in the longrun Thanks. It still just boggles my mind how we talked about not dating anyone else and getting married and now this. I can't looking at her social media, I tell myself I'm not going to do it but I just end up doing it. This just hurts so bad Edited September 16, 2016 by RandomlyHearbroken
Thistooshallpass21 Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 OP, first loves are tough, but my brotha you are young! Guess what? There are soooooo many beautiful women who are going to catch your eye, whether it be a future relationship or a one time thing. There are so many great things (women and experiences) to come. I'm not much older (23), and this is something I've come to learn. Take every words of wisdom from the people on here who have had many more experiences than I have had, they know their stuff. I remember after my first love broke up with me a wise man I worked with told me "females come and go" this is especially true at a young age. There will be more heartbreaks and they do get easier in the sense that you learn to deal with the adversity that they bring, but also remember that with every heart break comes lessons learned and greater opportunities. For example, I was in an on and off again relationship for roughly 2 years with a woman I thought I would end up marrying. Now I am about to embark on a job that I am passionate about and am extremely excited about in which my ex would never support as it is a dangerous job. As hard as it seems look for the positives, bigger and better things are to come my friend. Cheers to healing and future endeavors 1
smudge21 Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 Thanks. It still just boggles my mind how we talked about not dating anyone else and getting married and now this. I can't looking at her social media, I tell myself I'm not going to do it but I just end up doing it. This just hurts so bad Welcome to the horrible reality of relationships and love. Yeah, feels great when it all works, but when it ends, it's a pain that you can never truly describe. You're dealing with loss, much in the same way when someone dies. The only healer is time and doing whatever you can to remove that person from your life (definitely no stalking social media - the only outcome of that is to make you feel even worse). Yes at your age you have the world at your feet, but when love breaks it really doesn't matter what age you're at. Just focus on you and follow all the guides on here. You'll be fine and will love again, but only when you're ready. 1
Author RandomlyHearbroken Posted September 16, 2016 Author Posted September 16, 2016 I'm 44, and there's nothing I can say that won't sound condescending, but I'll take a shot. You're 16, and at your age, in high school...there is nothing unusual about the feelings of a teenage girl changing on a whim. She's just as likely to be in three more relationships before I finish typing this message. Listen to what I'm telling you. You're young...pace yourself, because you're gonna experience this kind of loss many times throughout your life. And you know what? Your gonna be on the other end of things too at some point...you're gonna be breaking the heart of some young girl, and I'll be here, telling her the same thing I'm telling you. If you were my son, I'd tell you this: At your age, I don't want you thinking about love. I don't want you thinking about marriage or babies either. I want you to use this experience as a learning tool to help you figure out things you want, and don't want, as you get older. I want you to think about your studies, about your future, about getting a good job. When you've mastered control over your own feelings, and your own life, then I want you to concentrate on making a family, being a good provider, and the most important thing: being a fine role model for your own son. Take good care of yourself.Thanks so much. I hate the fact that I'm stuck in a girl but I can't do anything . 1
preraph Posted September 16, 2016 Posted September 16, 2016 This is where you grow as a person and make yourself have the self-discipline to stop focusing on her and instead schedule lots of activities with other friends and family and go off on your own and stay busy. The key is to fill your time and mind with other good things, and that will help you stop focusing on her and just move forward. 2
Author RandomlyHearbroken Posted September 16, 2016 Author Posted September 16, 2016 OP, first loves are tough, but my brotha you are young! Guess what? There are soooooo many beautiful women who are going to catch your eye, whether it be a future relationship or a one time thing. There are so many great things (women and experiences) to come. I'm not much older (23), and this is something I've come to learn. Take every words of wisdom from the people on here who have had many more experiences than I have had, they know their stuff. I remember after my first love broke up with me a wise man I worked with told me "females come and go" this is especially true at a young age. There will be more heartbreaks and they do get easier in the sense that you learn to deal with the adversity that they bring, but also remember that with every heart break comes lessons learned and greater opportunities. For example, I was in an on and off again relationship for roughly 2 years with a woman I thought I would end up marrying. Now I am about to embark on a job that I am passionate about and am extremely excited about in which my ex would never support as it is a dangerous job. As hard as it seems look for the positives, bigger and better things are to come my friend. Cheers to healing and future endeavors Thanks, sometimes I just ask why me? But I guess if it was ment to be it would've worked or maybe in the future. Thanks again
Recommended Posts